Stop and Stare
by This-and-That
Summary: human Alice/Bella. Bella has an internship in New York this summer and by fluke, sees a girl who captivates her. Through a series of unlikely events, the paths of two completely separate lives seem to criss-cross all at once. AU.
1. One Moment

**Hello everyone. This story was started a very long time ago, and left alone. I have a very sunny day off while my girlfriend is at work, so I'm going to take the time to go through every chapter and edit it. And then continue it.**

**I am sorry that it's been over a year.**

**My writing style has changed very much. However, I remember my outline/gameplan for this story, and I intend to stick with it. I am astounded by how many reviews this story has racked up in my absence. You guys are awesome. I will do my best to serve you guys justice!**

**If you want to know what I've been up to since I've been away, feel free to message me. I'll respond.**

* * *

Prologue:

Life is like a clock. Time ticks away, and with every second you lose a bit of yourself.

Every minute that passes is a minute you will not be living. Every hour spent, is an hour spent doing something - and that _something _can never be done again - at the exact time, in the exact moment it was done.

Every moment is unique.

It's a simple concept, really; to believe that time is definite, time is subjective, and time is cumulative.

And as repetitive as life may get, moments will always vary and seconds will always pass; _and sometimes_, the things that happen in those moments are powerful. They can change things and they can change people. Indefinitely.

Now imagine me, Isabella Swan; imagine me standing in the streets of downtown New York, buying myself a hotdog. In a few seconds I would pay, and in a minute I would be eating said hotdog. Exactly a minute later, I would see her and my entire life would change forever.

This minute, would be unlike any other I'd ever lived.

...

"That'll be $2.50 please." Said the vendor, grinning widely at me.

I handed him three bills and told him to keep the change, walking over to sit on a ledge. I would have to go back to work soon, but I didn't want to rush this. I freakin' loved hot dogs.

I sunk my teeth into the supposedly-beefy goodness and suppressed a satisfactory, yet primitive, groan. This was so much better than being in the office.

I was interning at Target this summer; there was this huge side-project that the company had tossed around for months, but hadn't the time to really dive into. Thus it became my project for the 5 months I'd be there. Needless to say, I had become a 22 year-old workaholic and it wasn't even a _real _job.

Oh, the perks of not having a social life.

Fine, fine; I mean that in very loose terms. I _had_ a social life - after graduating from NY University, I'd been blessed with Angela; the best friend anyone could ever have, and her boyfriend Ben. Yet, the time I spent with them was slowly decreasing, and I really only saw them on weekends now. I'd lived with them for a while, but they'd recently moved out of our downtown apartment to move into a condo on their own. That left me with a three-bedroom flat and a mighty big bill. So far, I'd gotten an old high school friend, Cooper, to room with me for the time being, but I was still looking for another roommate. New York flats were expensive, to say the least.

It was my clumsy nature to spill ketchup all over myself, and so that's exactly what I did. The second-last bite of my delicious lunch did not come without a price, as the hotdog entered my mouth and the bun did not - coloring my blouse red and yellow. "Great," I muttered, getting up and heading to the vendor to get some napkins. I should've foreseen this, really.

And as the kind man handed me napkins, a number of things happened.

To start, a huge gust of wind (uncommon in the sheltered streets of New York) tore the napkins from my fingertips and sent them cascading down the street, dancing with their new found freedom. My eyes followed their path, and I debated going after them (I wasn't one to litter). At the same moment at the end of the street, a girl rounded the corner, looking down at her phone as she did. A stray napkin fluttered around her legs, then continued its way down the street; yet, my gaze had stopped its pursuit. The napkin had taken me to the girl, and now I started the ascent from her feet to her face. In that exact second, her eyes left her phone and swept across the streets before her, lazily; the same second that her eyes had flitted from the one napkin that was dancing in her direction, to another napkin, on to the hotdog vendor, and then finally to me; her gaze locked with mine.

So let's talk about this.

Have you ever had those moments - those moments, where things just stop _being_? Those times where everything seems to freeze, and in the standstill you become more aware of your surroundings than you have ever been in your entire life? Those seconds - minutes - months that seemed so trivial to you before, suddenly reveal themselves; they become crystal clear in meaning, as if a curtain had finally been pulled open and you could see the hidden object you'd been so studiously oblivious to. That one time in your life - that one surreal time - where it is clear that everything you've ever done, was leading up to _this_ moment, _this_ place, and _this_ feeling?

That's exactly what was happening to me.

In the noisy streets of New York city, on the dirty sidewalk where I stood, there was _silence_. People, hundreds of them, had just stopped existing; and not even the cars dared moved - the smoke from their exhaust frozen in this picture of stillness. Not in that second. In that second, the streets were empty. There was nothing except me, this girl, and three flitter-fluttering napkins blowing away in the distance.

I could see her with crystal clarity. I could see her short, raven hair, gently swaying with the wind; her light, pleasant skin, bathed in warm sunlight; her small figure, peeking out from designer clothes; and her warm, green eyes, locked onto mine. In that moment, my body did strange things and I knew, I just_ knew_, I had to meet her. And not only would I meet her, I would know her and she would know me and all that mattered was that it _was_. It was, and there were no other words for it.

My lips parted ever so slightly, as if I were going to call out her name - a name I had yet to discover, and my hand moved a millimeter in her direction; and there was nothing else but this.

And then the moment ended.

It was almost overwhelming, my trance being broken. A horn honked in the distance, and birds continued their friendly chirping, the shuffling of busy people resumed all at once; and what it sounded like was confusion. The hotdog vendor still had his hand outstretched towards me, and my left hand hung suspended in midair, where the napkins had escaped them. My eyes were still on this mysterious girl, yet hers had moved along after that one moment.

The girl turned towards the street and started hailing down a cab. As if something had gutted me, right in that second, I felt, rather than chose, my legs move in her direction. I needed to meet her. I just needed to.

A yellow taxi pulled up in front of her, and I quickened my pace. The girl got into the backseat, and I got closer. The door shut, and I was even closer. The taxi signalled to get back onto the road, and I was now running.

I couldn't let her get away; couldn't she see I needed to talk to her? Didn't she feel the whole world stop, the entire place _change_?

The cab edged its way back onto the road just as I made it to the sidewalk where she had stood moments earlier, and I stopped at the end of the concrete, as if there was an invisible wall between her and I.

I hardly knew how I got there, but it wasn't fast enough - I stood there helplessly, watching the yellow vehicle drive away from me. I watched the most important person I've never met, drive away; and I was almost certain that that was the end of it. I would never see her again. I couldn't even chase after her, because for some reason, the New York traffic was nonexistent at this time and the taxi sped down the near-empty street. I could almost make out the shape of a designer-clad shoulder through the window.

And so I stood, with ketchup and mustard battle stains on my business blouse; suddenly not knowing anything anymore, suddenly aware of nothing except the fact that I had a meeting in 10 minutes at Target. I sighed and turned on my heel.

Though I would be discussing Ad services for the next two hours, the only thing that ran through my head was just one sickening mantra.

"She got away."

...

"Bella?"

The voice broke me out of my thoughts, and I blinked twice. My eyes stared at the television screen, but all I could focus on were the little fuzzies of the pixels.

A curly-haired Cooper stood in front of me, bowl and fork in hand. "Are you alright?" He asked me.

I looked up at him, my face generally point-blank. Cooper's face twisted in confusion and slight concern, and he waved three fingers in front of my eyes. "Are you sick? How many fingers am I holding up?"

I watched the boy's hand wave madly in my face, and the corner of my lips curled up. "Nine, at that rate." I replied.

That seemed to suffice for him, because he shrugged and landed in the seat beside me, causing me to bounce on the cushions. "Are you still thinking about her?" He asked, picking up the remote and flipping through the channels. I didn't answer, and he groaned. "Come on Bells, it's been _forever_." I could practically hear the multiple complaints that were behind that; Cooper had initially been supportive of this ordeal, but my zombie-state had worn him down quickly.

Forever? Yes, it felt that way; it really did. In actuality, it had been three weeks and two days since I'd seen her. Three weeks and two days since I could think clearly, and much to Cooper's misfortune, since I could talk about anything else. Instead of telling him what he already knew, I grunted. "I didn't say anything." I told him, like it was no big deal.

_Ha_, as if I could get anything past my oldest friend. He rolled his eyes. "You don't even have to say anything," He said.

"Am I obvious?"

He gave me a knowing look. "I made Kraft Dinner, and you're not at the bottom of the bowl yet." He said. That was explanation enough - we both knew that I loved mac and cheese. I had an affinity for anything unhealthy, processed, and ingredient-controversial.

I won't even lie, since the day I saw that mystery girl, I had been on a constant lookout. I had combed the streets during my lunch breaks, keeping around the area near the hotdog vendor. In a state of utter desperation, I had thrown a pile of napkins into the nonexistent wind and watched them litter the ground around me. To say the least, I was a little bit obsessed.

I knew it would pass - these things happen, right? I didn't know her, I didn't even know if this girl was _nice_; if she even wanted to get to know me. I was acting crazy. I was being ridiculous.

Yet I couldn't stop.

It was like an itch that I couldn't find, and I wouldn't be satisfied, and I wouldn't sit still, until I found it. I'd never been gay before, but you know how they say 'love at first sight'? I'm pretty sure this was a case of 'gay at first sight'. It was stupid; but it was what it was.

Cooper was cool with it - he's cool with everything. He said he'd called it before too; apparently my interest in video games and plaid shirts made me dyke-material. Whatever logic that came from.

I wasn't disputing it - clearly this new obsession was something more than general interest in personality.

Ah, a personality I'd never discover . . .

"Stop moping." Commanded Cooper, once again yanking me from my thoughts.

Apparently my face can be very expressive.

"It's hard not to think about it." I told him, grimacing.

"This is just . . . so unlike you," He said, shrugging. I knew he wished I could get over it - we used to hang out all the time. Drink a few beers and play Black Ops online with friends, or go out and just eat Chinese food, seeing where the night would bring us. Usually to a bar. "You're usually so laid back about everything. Except when you're hungry, then you're terrifying. But seriously, this chick is messing with your head big time." He said.

I sighed.

I knew he was right - this girl _was_ messing with my head. And my general 'mopey-ness' of this whole situation put our hangout nights on hold for the time being. Cooper must of seen the look on my face, because his expression softened and he smiled. "I love you, even if you suck sometimes. You know that." He reassured me, throwing his lanky arm around my shoulder.

I leaned into him and smiled too. "You're an asshole, but I love you too." I told him. I meant that, really.

We spent the next hour and half watching mindless television shows; you know, the type that stage every scene for a separate punchline. Family Guy, That 70's Show . . . oh television, you are so entertaining.

It was nearing 5pm, and we both went to our rooms to change out of our pajamas - it was what we did on Sundays; pajamas the whole day.

Today though, there was a need to look presentable. We had a somebody coming over who had seen our ad for a roommate. As much as I loved it just being Cooper and I, the rent was ridiculous in this city and we needed another body in the flat. It was the first time I'd considered living with a stranger. I was okay with the idea, just as long as the person wasn't creepy or a douchebag. Messy? Cooper and I were like tornadoes leaving wreckage wherever we went. Messy wouldn't be a problem. Just as long as they were nice . . . I guess that's what the interview was for.

Like a movie, Cooper and I exited our rooms at the exact same time, our doors being right across from each other. I smirked at his Star Wars shirt, and he rolled his eyes at my plaid blouse. No words needed for that exchange.

We went straight back to the television - the bane of our existence, and waited. This guy would be coming soon. What was his name again? Jeremy? Jesse?

There was a knock on the door.

I glanced at Cooper, who shrugged. "Looks like Jasper's here."

* * *

**Do tell me what you think. :)**

**For those of you that aren't familiar with my stories, I usually have one OC. And it's usually Cooper. You'll like him. :P**


	2. Suck it

**Okay, I seriously have the attention span of a flea. I'm bored of editing. **

**I'm just gonna scan through the chapters to recap what I've written, and start writing the next installment. See you at chapter 20!**

**Mwah! ;)**

* * *

Jasper was really freakin' cool. It had been only a few weeks since he'd moved in, and we were all getting along as if we'd been BFFL's forever. At first I had been apprehensive, of course. Jasper _seemed_ alright during the interview, but you never know, right? He could be hiding a bag of toenail clippings under his pillow for all I knew. Unlikely, but completely possible. Eventually though (actually, kind of automatically), the fairly soft-spoken Southerner had earned his way into my heart; whether it was his lame sex jokes that did it, or his delicious cooking. I remain undecided on that one. We were now even on nickname basis - he was Cowboy, and I was Chimes. You know, like bell chimes? Yeah.

He was pretty awesome.

On weekends Coop and I went to the bars with Ben and Angela, and on weekdays we'd have our usual How I Met Your Mother television night. Jasper went out a lot to see his girlfriend, and Cooper and I joked about getting multitudes of cats in the stead of actual relationships. C'est la vie. Needless to say, things were _pretty_ peachy.

I hadn't forgotten about the Napkin girl, as we'd come to name her. Far from it. I'd just accepted the fact that I'd let her get away, and would spend the remaining 50 or so years of my life not knowing her. . . Serious kudos to me for saying that like it was no big deal. Reality?- I cried.

Yep.

Young adult, career-starting, serious-until-intoxicated, Bella Swan, _cried _because she didn't meet some girl she thought was pretty.

My. Life. Is so lame.

I may be belittling my affection for her though; _pretty_ was a gigantic understatement. It was like calling an oak tree an acorn - that shit just doesn't fly. She was more than pretty, she was fucking gorgeous - all seven seconds of her! She was amazing, wonderful, brilliant, dazzling, stupendous, fabul- _fuck it_. For simplicity's sake, she was indescribable. _So_ indescribable, that if I told people what literally happened, it would sound utterly ridiculous (at least on my part): Bella buys hotdog; hotdog attacks Bella; napkins fly to girl; Bella sees girl; world stops; girl turns Bella gay; world restarts; Napkin girl leaves, and Bella mopes forever. Denouement.

Ugh, even repeating it to myself was embarrassing. How could one girl - one _stranger_, do so much to me in so little time? In the _absence_ of time! Fucking hell. And then the obsessiveness in the following weeks that Cooper had appropriately named the Zombie Scare. One day. One second. One girl. That was all it took to uproot my entire life. It was like a quarter-life crisis. I was never one to be cheesy, but I swear to God I had met the girl of my dreams that day. And now to never find her. Even if I _did_ find her, what would I do? I'd probably punch her in the face because I wouldn't know how else to react. Geez: I had even started to miss her . . .

But alas! Time goes on and so does life. At least that's what I kept telling myself. Even Jasper had his part in convincing me to move on - Kraft Dinner with extra_-extra_cheese? Oh boy, where did this man come from? He was happiness in human form. Needless to say, _that_ and several Cooper-inspired drinks later, I was back on my feet. Well, sort of. My mind frequently went back to Napkin girl; but with less fervor and determination. Every thought was defeated, due to me knowing there was only one possible outcome. Must I say it again? I probably should for good measure: I lost her and she is never coming back. Thus, I suck.

What if I did things differently that day? Oh, God. That just gets me started on a whole other cycle of _what if_'s . . .

So far, I'd found only one, very positive thing from my encounter with her. That new advertisement campaign I was working on for Target? I'd landed our winning slogan: Don't Miss the Target.

The idea came to me relatively easy and in direct correlation to my almost-meeting with Napkin girl. The company loved it and put me head of the project! Well, I already was the head of the project, but it was nice hearing the boss reinforce that. I was spending longer hours in the office now and we were coming to the stages of actually implementing the campaign. A photoshoot was soon necessary for our Don't Miss the Target models, and that was the latest buzz in the workplace.

Hurrah!

Yes, the hurrah was necessary. If all goes well, I could land a permanent job at Target; live in New York forever; marry a man with a mustache; and have fifty or so kids.

At least that was the plan.

* * *

"It's terrible." I said, my voice completely flat.

Cooper's face lit up, and he grinned wildly. "I knew you'd love it! Everyone at the studio does. This is great, this is just . . . fabulous. This beats Lord of The Rings!" He was jumping up and down like a crack squirrel. Maybe it was me, but I didn't see the glamor of it. All I saw was myself in a really stupid costume.

I gave Cooper a bored look. "Nothing beats Lord of The Rings. And I'm also contemplating killing you."

"_Look_ at it! It's got so much potential to be a series!" He exclaimed again, spreading the storyboard onto the kitchen table in front of me. In summary, Cooper had been working on a new comic book series for the past month: his finished outline lay before me.

Title? _Bella and the Zombies_.

Plot? Oh yeah, brace yourself for this:

Normal girl Bella meets supernatural Naztkin (_such an _original_ spoof of Napkin - _[insert eyeroll here]) girl, who turns her into a zombie. Breaking through her spell with the help of friends, Bella turns back into a human, but with zombie ass-kicking powers. Bella sets out on a quest to save the world from an impending zombie apocalypse by going after Naztkin girl, who is currently creating an army of zombie badassery.

Correct. Cooper had officially, _and_ successfully, turned the most important moment of my life into a full-fledged, testosterone-pumping adventure comic.

Gun to head, boom?

Everything about it was lame and my costume was just plain offensive. I would _never _wear plaid spandex! God!

How did I let this happen? Well, _I didn't_. Cooper was halfway done when he showed me the first time, and Jasper thought it was the greatest idea in the world. Ange and Ben didn't seem to mind it, saying it was 'unique'. Screaming, threatening, and excessive-drinking later, Jasper had somehow talked me into accepting my fate as the stupidest comic book hero in history. There was really nothing I could do at this point, though I still strongly disapproved. That didn't bother Cooper in the slightest.

"My eyes have never been so disturbed." I told him, taking in the sketches of undead slaughter. His drawings totally didn't do Naztkin - er, Napkin girl, justice. Her hair was all wrong, her face too evil. She wasn't sexy enough, she wasn't great enough - she wasn't perfect. And even my character - Christ, when did I get so _busty_?

Cooper placed a hand on my shoulder and stretched the other one out, as if he was revealing an expensive painting. "Think; what do nerds such as you and I adore? Blood. Guts. Cool weapons. Zombies. This story has got it all." He said. The way he was presenting it reminded me of a host introducing a celebrity. "_And_," he emphasized. "There may even be some lesbian action in it!" He shook my shoulder, and my eyes instantly narrowed. "Every boy's wet dream!" He squealed.

I closed my eyes. Breathe. Breathe. It's just a stupid comic. An embarrassing as hell, stupid comic. But no one I know reads comics, so there is no harm in this actually getting published. There is no harm. No harm. No harm.

My eyelids opened, revealing a picturesque happy Cooper. Did I have enough willpower to not kill him right now?

He suddenly hugged me, bouncing up and down as he did. "This is incredible! You are so inspiring!" He chirped.

I sighed, peeling the lanky mess of a man from my body. "Will you stop jizzing. Let me crawl up and die, please."

"No thanks." He said back, rolling up his storyboard and heading back to his room.

"Make me some KD then." I called out to him.

His reply came back from behind his closed door. "Anything for my main gal!"

I rolled my eyes.

Now Napkin girl would be around forever. In hard copy, bad ass, evil villiany.

I was desperately trying to cut her out of life, yet here she was: stuck.

Great.

Cooper can officially, _and_ successfully, suck it.

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed that. I've got plans for this story.**

**Btw, I'm seriously considering starting a "Bella and the Zombies" fic (Alice/Bella) if you guys are interested. I feel like it could be hilarious.**

**Look out for more!**

**Oh, and I love Cooper. I have a feeling he will be a permanent OC for all my stories. He's so freakin' lovable!**


	3. Closeted Wants

"Why are you ordering so much pizza?" I asked Cooper, arms crossed.

He already owed me $30 from Friday, and now here he was, ordering 4 pizzas for five skinny people. I had already spent more than I should on alcohol, seeing as it was Super Bowl night and that in itself required drinks; but I didn't see the purpose of ordering a feast.

"We've got company," Cooper replied, putting the phone down. Jasper walked into the kitchen, and I passed him a beer.

"What company?" I asked, giving him a knowing look. Last time Cooper invited people over, we'd somehow ended the night locked out of our flat, with a stranger passed out in the bathtub. Not to mention that when we finally got back in, Degrassi season 1-7 DVDs were scattered inside our bedrooms. In advance; _no_, I do not know what happened that night. Nor did I feel inclined to find out.

"_His_ company." Cooper pointed to Jasper, who just grinned.

_Well, I hope his friends are better than Cooper's_.

"My girlfriend and her brother are coming over for the game." Said Jasper. I almost smiled, because now that I looked at him, he _was_ fairly dressed up tonight. Who wears a dress shirt for beer and pizza? - a guy in _looooove_!

I teased him about that for a while, and he shrugged it off with happy smiles. Ben and Ange came over not very long after, and the excessive drinking began. The TV table was littered with empty bottles and the Super Bowl hadn't even started yet. I wasn't drunk; I wasn't even tipsy - but I still managed to trip over coffee the table.

Jasper laughed. "I hope you're not like that at work, Chimes."

I got up from the floor, with wonderful beer stains on my shirt. How lovely. "Fuck work." I shrugged. "It's long and hard, and it drives me crazy."

"That's what she said." Jasper grinned.

A comeback was on my lips, but I did have to admit that was a good one. I settled with a "Shut up".

Naturally, he replied with a smirk and "Never".

Oh boy, he's so gonna get it. When his girlfriend comes over, I'm gonna let it flow - all those embarrassing things about Jasper were going to be exposed. Did he really think I hadn't noticed his obsession with horses? Especially white ones. That would be a good place to start.

"Football is so macho." Ben said, as the players started to run onto the field.

Cooper shrugged. "It's men in tights, grabbing each other."

"I, on one hand, really appreciate the tights." Ben replied, earning himself a slap on the arm from Ange. "I appreciate tights on anyone."

"I think that's a wardrobe hint, Ange." Jasper said, raising his bottle towards her.

Angela rolled her eyes. "I'll start wearing tights when you do."

_Knock, knock_

Everyone's heads swiveled to the door. "Pizza!" Ben cried.

I locked eyes with Cooper, and a second later we were both racing to the door. It was a tradition from way back when, that whoever opens the door first doesn't have to pay for the delivery. Thus the wrestling began. We toppled over each other, and I nearly swallowed a mouthful of Cooper's curly hair. We were on our hands and knees now, crawling towards the door; Cooper grabbed my ankle and pulled me back. As he was passing, I pushed his face away with my palm and scurried to the doorknob. My hand was a foot away when Jasper grinned down at me, and swung the door open himself.

What a cheater.

My protest was on my lips, but the words didn't come out. The pizza man stood there, 4 boxes piled high in his hands, but two people were standing behind him. One girl, and one boy.

Suddenly I was 2 months back, standing beside a hotdog vendor. Well, it felt that way; it was same type of surreal. It was the same feeling. It was the same _girl_.

I would recognize the spikes in her hair anywhere; her face was as clear and familiar to me as if I'd only seen her yesterday. It was Napkin girl. Napkin girl was _here_!

My tongue was rubber in my mouth, it was dry and inanimate. I couldn't get the God damn thing to move. I just stood there- er, I was on my hands and knees; I just crouched there, hair probably tousled from the wrestling, and big yellow beer stains on my shirt, gawking. I couldn't believe it. What were the chances!

She stood, lips curled back in a smile; body clad in designer clothes; and green eyes on _Jasper_.

Holy fuck.

_She_ was Jasper's girlfriend!

As if to confirm my inner monologue, Jasper swept her into a kiss; a super classy one that made them look like long lost lovers. _Bleh_.

He did a bro handshake with the other guy, and invited them both in.

I almost didn't register the tugging on my shoulder, but I looked up and realized it was Cooper; trying to get me off the floor.

Jasper grabbed Napkin's girl's hand and led the two guests inside. He grinned.

"Guys, this is Edward and Alice." As he said the former's name, he glanced into her eyes and I swear they were looking at each other's souls. They were ridiculous!

Cooper was the first to react, clapping his hand on both Jasper and Alice's shoulders, and looking between the two. "Good to finally meet Jasper's ball and chain." He joked."I'm Cooper."

Ben and Ange called out their hellos, and then eyes were on me.

Time to use my mouth. "Nnnngh-"

Oops.

Jasper raised an eyebrow, and then chuckled. "This is Bella; she's a little flabbergasted because I beat her to the door."

"I thought I heard monkeys on the other side." Alice replied, walking up to me and sticking her hand out.

Do people even shake hands these days?

Oh boy, she has a nice smile. Right; the handshake.

I snapped back to reality, took her hand, and shook it wildly.

Cooper took the pizza from the delivery man, and turned to me. "Can I borrow like, a hundred bucks?"

"Are you kidding-"

I was cut off by a wave of a hand. The other boy, Edward I think his name was, pulled out a wad of bills and handed it to the deliverer. "I got it."

Cooper ran a hand through his hair. "Gee, big spender. Thanks."

"Not a problem." Edward said, turning to me.

I didn't know what he was doing until it was done, but he took my hand and kissed my knuckles. "I'm Edward."

I blinked at him. "Rad." I replied.

Wow. I said 'rad'. What was I, fifteen? God, I really needed to clear my head.

The group congregated in front of our television, and Ben told Cooper to get more beer from the fridge. I followed Cooper to the kitchen, and took the chance to sweep him away while we were alone.

"Bella, what are you-"

"_Shh_!" I hissed, pushing him into a closet and closing the door behind us.

"God, I think I have coat burn, what are you on about?" Cooper said in a hushed voice. "Why are we in the closet? I thought you came out already."

I narrowed my eyes at the gay joke, but I didn't have time for silly prattle.

"It's _her_!" I hissed.

"Alice?"

"Alice!"

"What about her?"

I grabbed his shoulders and shook him like a rag doll. "It's Napkin girl!" I cried.

"Alice?"

"Yes!"

"_Jasper'_s Alice?"

"Yes!"

"Oh shit."

"Yeah, shit." I breathed.

"She's hot."

I swatted him in the head.

"Ouch!"

"Jasper's dating the girl of my dreams!"

"I know, they're cute together."

I hit him in the head again.

"Ow! Stop it."

"_You_ stop it. You're on my side. What the hell do I do?"

"I dunno."

I rolled my eyes. "You're useless." I could Cooper's shadow cringe away, expecting another hit. "I'm not going to hit you." I told him.

"Just making sure." He said.

Once more, I was shaking him. "What are the chances, Coop? What are the fucking chances!"

"Slim to none."

"Exactly!" I cried.

There was a pause, then Cooper spoke again. "This is gonna add such a crazy spin on my comic."

"FORGET THE COMIC!"

"Never! It's my baby. . ." Cooper protested.

I sighed. "I want her Coop." I admitted. I never wanted anything else so bad, and it was pathetic. I wanted her, and I didn't want to want her.

"We can kill Jasper." He suggested, and it took me a second to realize he was joking. I was too disheartened to reply though. "I'll hold, you punch?"

"Tempting. . ." I trailed off. "But I love Jasper too much."

Cooper shrugged. "Yeah, he's our homeboy."

There was another moment of silence, and all I could do was stroke a nearby coat. I stroked it because it was calming, not because I was crazy. Then Cooper spoke again.

"So . . . How do you feel about it?"

"Uhh," I said. How _did_ I feel about it? I wasn't entirely sure. My new, awesome roommate was dating the girl that the past two months of my life centered around. It wasn't his fault, obviously; but hell! It felt like hell! My life was being so retarded right now. "Like shit." I replied.

"Are you gonna tell him?" Cooper asked.

"So he can break up with her, and hand her to me? Of course not!" I hissed.

"Well then, what?" He asked.

"What, what?"

"If you're not going to do anything, then why are we still here?"

I sighed. What _could_ I do? "I don't know."

"Let's get out, then." He said, and I nodded in agreement. Before either of us could open the door, it opened on its own accord.

Alice stood in front of us, looking very much confused. "Oh," She said. "Sorry."

I raised my eyebrows slowly, then looked at Cooper. The realization made me laugh. Cooper caught on pretty quickly too, and we both blurted out our protests at double speed.

"What?- _Him_? Oh no; no, no, no, no, never." I said quickly.

"Never!" He added.

"Like, just, _no_." I said.

"Not at all. I'll shave off my beautiful locks before _that_."

"As would I." I nodded.

"As would Jasper." Cooper supplied.

Alice stood there, perhaps overwhelmed by the sudden spitfire, not sure whether to laugh or to take us seriously.

"It's a closet." I said quietly, realizing immediately after that that statement had no point to it.

As if it would help everything, Cooper and I smile our biggest smiles in unison to the girl. We looked ridiculous.

"I'm just going to grab my cellphone . . ." Alice said, gently pushing past us and reaching for her coat.

I blinked at Cooper, and not a second was wasted as we both made a beeline out of there, ducking underneath the girl's arms. Gosh, we were practically the same person.

So that was my second meeting with Napkin girl.

Oh, God.

She thinks I'm crazy.


	4. Coincidence and Discovery

I was just going to have to deal with it. Really, did it seem like I was a girl with much choice in the matter?

I had spent the entire night watching them snuggle, laugh, kiss, be all couple-esque; even when the half time show came on and Fergie murdered Sweet Child O' Mine, I couldn't concentrate on anything but them. Anything but _her_.

I still couldn't believe it. The girl that had turned my boring, stable world into shits, giggles, and zombies; turned out to be Jasper's girlfriend - of all people! But that wasn't the main fact. The main fact was that she was in my life again. The girl who I thought had gotten away, the girl who I so hopeless had given up on ever seeing again, was now in my life, on my couch, eating my pizza. That had to mean _something_, right? These things don't just happen. They can't.

This is seriously God's idea of a joke.

Damn this world!

Ben and Ange had left right after the game, and we were now watching the Glee episode that came on right after. For a television addict, it was weird that I'd never watched Glee before. I did enjoy it though - what's more awesome than turning your life into a musical? Good job Hollywood, good freakin' job.

"You look awful pale, Bella." Said Jasper, regarding me with concern. "I mean, you're already borderline albino; but now you just look super anemic."

If anything was making me sick, it was the sight of Alice curled up into Jasper's arms. Why did they have to look so God damned cutesy?

"Yeah, Bella. I wonder what in the world is bothering you right now." Cooper said, innocently.

Of course, I knew all too well that Cooper was being the anti-innocent, and I shot him as discreet a glare as I could. "I'm just dizzy, that's all." I muttered.

Who's the guy that said honesty was golden? That's a lie: _always_ make excuses. I would know.

"Would you like me to get you a glass of water?" Edward chimed in, suddenly in front of me. Holy moly, I never see this guy move; he's always just _there_. "Perhaps some tea?" He offered.

Wow. First of all, this was_ my_ house and he was acting like it was his and I was just some damsel in distress; and second of all, I was so sick and tired of him being a 'gentleman' to me all night. Perhaps I should tell him that his sister turned me gay in 0.01 seconds - maybe that'd get him to back off.

I took a breath. I was going to make it through this night in one piece. One big, gay piece.

"I'm fine, thanks. But could you pass the vodka?"

...

I popped another Advil, my hangover was being my morning bitch. Who put Super Bowl on a Sunday night? Didn't they know that everybody in the world drinks during the Super Bowl?

Terrible, just terrible.

It wasn't even like I could plunk my head on my desk and shut my brain off at work today - today was the start of the week-long media capture. Photoshoots, commercial shootings, ad design meetings: _everything_ was this week. And I was one of the head honchos. Great.

I had just gotten to the studio and everything was already hectic: half naked men ran around to get outfitted; lights were being rolled here and there; people were shouting for the photographers; and photographers were having coffee, not really giving a shit. A girl with an earpiece led me to the meeting room where we re-briefed ourselves on today's events, and then another girl led me to the doughnut table. _Mmmm doughnuts_.

Oh, you freakin' know a clumsy moment comes up now.

A particularly feisty honey glaze slips through my fingers as I'm raising it to my mouth, and I reach out to grab it. My essentially useless fingers fumble with it in the air and then it bounces onto the ground. I run over to it, bending down to pick it up just as a man wheeling a huge fan comes behind me, knocking me over.

My face. Is in the doughnut.

Fuck this world!

"Bella?" A familiar voice causes me to raise my head from the pastry.

Oh my God it's Alice. "Are you alright?" She asks me, holding her hand out to help me up.

I take it, wiping my face with my other hand, and smile sheepishly when I'm at eye level. "I think I'll live."

Alice laughs, and I might just have memorized that moment. The way her lips curl up and her eyebrows raise when she's happy; yeah, I could get used to that. "Are you going to be on the floor every time I meet you?" She asks.

"I seriously hope not." I told her. And then my shoulders bunch up, because believe it or not, I get _shy_. Young, successful adult, getting shy! This was unbelievable, not to mention unacceptable.

"You work here?" Alice asks me, and as I take in her words, I also take in the unlikeliness of the situation. Here I was, meeting her _again_. Three completely separate circumstances, and one single girl. Well, not really 'single'. Let's not get into that.

"Yeah, I'm actually sort of running this project." I said, scratching the back of my neck because my words are rubber and I was shit at talking. "Do you work here?" I ask.

Alice smirks and I don't know why. It was an innocent enough question, right?

"I own this place."

Well, my jaw takes a vacation to Zimbabwe. Goodbye jaw; hello open mouth. Mouth that won't close for the life of me. Good God, she's joking.

"Don't look so surprised." She says in mock-offense, but no words could change my facial expression.

"You-" I started, stumbled, blurted, barfed. "_This_ is all yours?" I managed to get out. I took a look around this place. It was huge; one of the best studios in New York - which is why I chose it. This company had a few locations, and was also a multi-million dollar venue. I couldn't wrap my head around it. She couldn't possible own it, she was like, my age! I would've known when I'd booked their services, or when I'd researched their company. I spoke to a man named Carlisle on the phone, _he_ said he owned it. No, no no . . .

"Okay, well technically my father owns it; but he's living in Washington right now so I manage most of the New York stuff. Edward and I take turns checking in, but this baby is a well-oiled machine; we don't always have to physically _be_ at the venues. It usually just when we have big projects, like so, that I have to oversee everything. I'm mostly in the editing room after the shoot." Alice said. She was talking like it was no big deal. Like being ridiculously rich at such a young age was absolutely normal. Suddenly I felt self-conscious that she was in my flat last night. My messy, messy flat.

"I - Uhh, there's- you. That's nice." I finally get out. I seemed to have a thing for being incoherent around her. "It's . . . Rad."

Alice laughs again, shaking her head slightly. "You look like you need a moment. I have to run to the meeting room quickly because I'm late, but I think we'll be working together afterwards, right?"

I nod, dumbly.

"I'll see you around then." She says, and I'm reduced to a blinking, wordless, wreck.

She takes a step to pass me, but freezes. "Oh, and you have something on your face."

"Huh?" My face? Her face? Her hand coming up to my mouth?- What's going on?

Before I know it, her thumb is tracing along my jaw, carefully wiping away an unseen sugar-smear. Her nails faintly graze my skin, and the millisecond that her fingers linger at my face feels like a year and a day. But it's all still too fast, because then, with a smile, she's already walking away from me.

The warmth from her touch is all too apparent, and I already know I'm flustered. I watch the back of her head until it disappears into the crowd.

Good God, I really did have it bad.

This can't be good for my health.

Fuck.


	5. Turning A New Leaf, A New Salad Leaf

**I've realized something. I hate writing about Bella at work. My resolution? -I will try to keep her as far away from the office as possible. Lol. **

**Enjoy! I really like writing this story . . . tell me your thoughts. **

* * *

The studio was nearly empty with the work day having finished 3 hours ago. There were a few stragglers here and there, but nothing to really break our concentration.

Alice and I had stayed behind late, working on the selection process of the hundreds of photographs taken today. She was playing around with some designs on the computer, and I sat beside her, laptop open and fiercely typing emails. Sure, I was ridiculously incapable when I was around her, but we had found common ground in the one thing we both took very seriously - our work. Thus, after the initial part of the day passed, something in our brains had switched into a different mode where we were driven to complete our tasks.

After all, I hadn't beat 300 other internship candidates for nothing.

"What do you think of this?" Alice asked me, snapping me out of my typing trance.

I looked to the screen for the first time in the hour; I had been so absorbed in my work that I hadn't been paying attention.

What she was showing me was entirely different from what our advertising team had mapped out previously. Everything was different - the entire approach was different. Like, _woah_; but nevertheless, in some way it actually looked better. In fact, I was impressed. The image was to be a billboard ad, and she had taken the pre-chosen template of two particularly hunky models. Except then she pretty much art-vomited all over it, gave it a rinse, and vectorized the whole thing. That's how different it was. 'Don't Miss the Target' was splattered across one model's chest, and a big red target was behind the other. The company was going to shit.

I'll give her this though - it was definitely more seductive and attention grabbing.

"Wow," I breathed. "It's different - but it has character. You're really good at that stuff."

Alice smiled, pleased with her work. "That's why you hired me." She grabbed two water bottles from her desk and threw one to me. "Look at these, too." She said, flipping through various pictures of the same like. Each one was different, but had the same edge to it as the last. Wow, she had really done a lot today. We were making more progress than I'd hoped for.

"Those are great, Alice. Let me just email the headquarters, they're gonna love this." I said, turning to my screen again.

I was in the middle of typing the recipients when Alice closed my laptop.

"Wha-" I started.

"Stop working. You have all week and we're already way ahead." She told me, handing me my laptop case as if to prove her point.

I wasn't quite sure how to react, no one had_ ever _gotten in the way of me or my work before. "It's only 8 o'clock," I protested. "And I'm on a roll."

Alice chuckled. "It's 10:30, Bella."

"What?" I said, snapping my head to the clock on the wall. Sure enough, it was 10:30pm on the dot. "Gee . . ."

"You work too much." She stated, crossing her arms.

"Big city, big bills." I said, knowing that it sounded totally dorky.

I wanted to say something cool, something that would make her think I was interesting, but instead I just shuffled under her gaze. She was staring.

Her face was puzzled, as if she were assessing me, and I waited until she broke her silence.

"You look very familiar." She said, furrowing her eyebrows.

I smiled wolfishly. "Well, you did see me last night." I said.

"No, I swear I've seen you before." She pressed. "Before last night."

My breath caught in my chest. Could it be? Did she remember how she came into my world, chewed it up, spit it out, and turned it into a huge, laughable joke?

"Oh my God, I've got it!" She exclaimed.

"You remember?" I asked quietly; maybe too quietly.

Alice clapped her hands together. "Kristen Stewart. You look _exactly_ like Kristen Stewart, that actress." She said, triumphantly.

Ah, fuck this life. "Oh,"

"That's crazy; you're a spitting image." She continued.

"I get that a lot." I said meekly.

"Do you act?" She asked.

Why is that always the order things go? People say I look like somebody who does _something_, and then assume I can do that same. Gosh, people really needed to get it through their heads that I was pretty much talentless. "Nope." I breathed.

Alice laughed, lighting up the room in a way I adored way too much. "Well, neither can she; so it's all good."

We joked about Kristen Stewart and her monotone acting in Twilight for a while, before deciding to call it quits for the day. Before we left, we ate some late night doughnuts that had been left over from the morning, and thankfully my shirt remained clean.

We walked up to the control room so Alice could shut off the utilities. It was a small room that oversaw the entire studio from its window, three stories up. As she placed and turned the key to shut down the power, I watched in slight awe as the lights went out, one by one. The normally hectic place was empty, equipment left where they'd been used; and as the place were doused in darkness, for some reason I thought it looked really beautiful. There's something peculiar about seeing things in a standstill, when you'd only ever seen them in action before. It was nice.

"Don't you have like, a janitor or something to close down the place at night?" I asked her, as we walked out of the building and she locked the door.

"Yeah, but I like closing it up myself so I tell the custodians to go home early. It kind of gives me closure at the end of the day." She replied.

I mused at this logic, but I guessed that I wouldn't really understand.

"There's something about being alone here, when everybody else is gone. It's like it stops being work, and it starts being your choice. I can't really explain it." She said.

"No, I get it." I responded. Well, at least I thought I got it. "For most people, this place is just a pay check; they come in, do their work, and leave. When you get to take the people out of the picture, see the work they do, frozen in place; you can kind of see this place as a whole and appreciate it."

Alice smiled.

"I couldn't have said it better."

...

"Throw a sticky! Throw a sticky!" Cooper yelled into my ear.

I maneuvered my virtual self, and threw a sticky grenade through the window. A big yellow '+200' popped up on my screen, indicating a double kill.

"Behind you! There's a guy behind you!" Cooper cried again, bouncing on the couch. "Knife, knife, knife, knife, knife him!"

I turned around and melee attacked the person who was sneaking up behind me. "Geez, stop backseat driving. I saw him." I told Cooper. I moved my character into a building, setting off a trap and blowing myself to bits. "Ah, shit!"

"Let me play." Cooper said, and I handed him the controller. He was better at Black Ops than I was, but I attributed that to him having no life. I shook my head as he got a 5-killstreak.

My stomach groaned louder than the game, and I rubbed it. "I'm starving." I said.

"Jasper should be back soon." Cooper responded, eyes set on the screen.

Again with the movie-likeness of my life, Jasper opens the door to the flat at that second.

"Jasper!" Cooper greeted.

"Cooper!" Jasper hollered back.

"Food!" I cried, nearly running up to him and grabbing his groceries.

Now that Jasper was in our lives, Cooper and I had become completely dependent on him. We were too sloth-like for things like groceries and cleaning, and Jasper seemed apt to tasks like so. Thus he became the errand man. Given, Jasper was out a lot, recording with his jazz band and doing small gigs; which consequently led the two of us, Cooper and I, to sometimes be waiting days long after the need for groceries to arrive. We could usually stall for a while by ordering delivery; but once we had to physically leave the house and go to the nearest Sobeys. We try to avoid situations like that.

I pulled out the various foods from the bags, my glee turning to dismay. Apples, oranges, celery, tomatoes, fish, _skim_ milk . . . the like. "Are you trying to kill us?" I asked, gawking at all the healthy foods.

Jasper laughed, putting his satchel down and helping me unpack. "Contrarily, the opposite." He said with a crooked smile.

"Where is the sugar? The wrappers? The expiry dates!" I cried, holding up a stalk of bananas with the tips of my fingers like it was the plague. _Why would he be so cruel_?

Jasper gave a light sigh before explaining. "Alice is a vegetarian. She's trying to get me to eat healthier, because what we eat is a way of life, we don't _have_ to eat meat if vegetables can sustain us, yada, yada, yada . . ." He trailed off.

I handed him the bananas. "She's trying to brainwash you away from your macho-ness. Go out and buy steak like a man!" I commanded, giving my best bossy face. He was still the noob of the house, and seeing as life subsistence now branched off from him, he should fix this horrible problem.

Jasper grinned, and by now Cooper had joined the conversation, marveling over all the fruits. There was a first time for everything in this flat. "Why did you buy so many cucumbers," Cooper asked. "That's a little gay of you."

Jasper shrugged. "Making Alice happy. I wanna give it a try."

"I assume you're talking about the vegetarianism, not the homosexuality." Cooper said, taking an apple and biting loudly into it.

"Right." Jasper replied. "By the way, Alice is psyched that she's working with you." He said, talking to me.

I dropped the potatoes I'd been holding, and Cooper struggled to catch them as they spilled out towards the floor. Stupid motor functions!

"Something 'a matter?" Jasper asked, very confused by my reaction.

"No," I said, taking a few potatoes out of Cooper's now-overflowing arms. "It was a real surprise, seeing her there."

"Yeah, I can't believe I didn't put two and two together when you told me you were doing that project for Target. It must've slipped my mind, because it's been crazy busy lately with the band." Jasper said.

"Telling us your girlfriend is filthy rich must've also slipped your mind." Cooper breathed, rolling his potatoes back onto the table.

"Yeah, you suck." I told him. He couldn't have prepared me for that? For any of this? How about showing us a picture of her during the two months he lived here, so that I could discover Napkin girl was also Jasper's girl? Even a general description might have tipped me off. Couldn't he have given us _anything_? Good God, he was friggen in puppy love with Alice and we had no idea who she was until now.

Jasper smiled apologetically. "Sorry. I didn't think it would matter. Alice isn't really like that, anyways - she doesn't exactly act like she's rich, so sometimes I forget." He said sheepishly.

Cooper cocked an eyebrow. "The day I forget someone is rich, is the day I, myself, am a millionaire."

Jasper laughed again. "Oh, and Bella."

"Yeah?"

"Alice is coming over on Friday; she's gonna sleep here. Can you be nice to her?" He asked me.

I looked at him quizzically. What an odd request. "Umm, sure. Why wouldn't I be nice to her?"

"Well when she came over for the Super Bowl, she kind of thought you were acting weird. And then you ignored her all night." He said.

"Oh," I breathed. Yeah, _that_. I'd avoided her because she was with_ him_, and also because Edward wasn't giving me a second alone the entire evening. Also, I avoided her because I didn't want to get to know her. Not when she was unavailable, like she was. Not when I couldn't have her. It's better to not have her in my life at all, than to have her an always want her - right? That was my reasoning. And then fucking work happened . . . The chances of that? I'll get back to you on that one after being hit by lightning a few times. "No problem." I said, plastering a smile on my face.

Jasper hummed. "Great. She also wants to cook dinner for us."

"Sweet." I responded.

"A nice, vegetarian dinner."

* * *

**See what I've done there? Vampire vegetarians, human vegetarians - Jasper trying to adapt? Oh, self, sometimes you are so clever that I must talk to you. **

**I am not insane. **

**Hope you enjoyed that! Mooooore coming up.  
**


	6. Entering the Lottery

**I do, really enjoy this universe. Cooper, thou art awesome. **

**

* * *

**

It was the middle of the day, and for once, I had nothing to do. Absolutely nothing. Is this what freedom feels like?

I freakin' like it.

The studio was the least busy it had been all week, simply because it was the final day of production and no one had any work left except for wrapping up. We'd finished ridiculously early mostly due to the fact that Alice was a machine. She flippin' did her editing as fast and easy as the task of blinking was, and we'd stayed behind late nearly every day of the week. Now it was Friday, and yes, I was reaping the rewards of hard work until it was bone dry.

My makeshift lounge chair was really just two boxes and a speaker, but I'd strategically put it off in the corner so no one could see me slacking. Hell, everyone was slacking in this place now; but I had an image to maintain, y'know?

A worker turned the corner and was about to hurry past, but stopped as he glanced at me.

"Sorry, ma'am." He said.

I watched him, as he looked at me expectantly. "Can I help you?" I asked.

"I need to pack away that speaker you're sitting on." He said.

"Oh," I jumped up from my slouch-fest and helped him put the speaker on a trolley. At least I'd have my boxes to sit on, you wouldn't think they were comfortable but you'd be surprised with-

"And I'm going to need those boxes too." He said.

Fuck! Nobody understands me.

"Sure thing." I said, nonchalantly. I watched as he wheeled my chair away, and decided I needed to find a replacement.

Walking into the open space of the studio, I looked around for stray boxes. To my dismay, most things were cleared out by now. I saw Alice from across the room, gliding between trolleys and ducking under big men holding big equipment. I smiled and made my way towards her.

"Excuse me," I said, pushing past people. "Sorry," I muttered, after stepping on someone's toe. "Can I get through here? Thanks." God, I felt like I was pushing my way towards a celebrity. "Excuse me," I said again, trying to duck under two men holding a ladder.

Yeah, Bella Swan walks under a ladder - bad luck, right?

"Woah-" I said, tripping over a power cord. I grabbed a man's shirt to stop my fall, causing him to fall down with me. The trays he had been holding bounced onto the ground with loud clutters and clangs that echoed through the studio. And then it was like the whole workplace stopped to look at the man on the ground, and me buried underneath him. No, literally - _everybody_ froze in their spots to look at the source of the noise.

"Mmrggph!" I said, trying to get my face out of his back. I could see out of my peripheral vision people starting to crowd around us.

"God, Joe get off you're suffocating her!" Someone yelled.

The large man rolled off me, and the breath of un-sweaty air was welcomed in my lungs.

"You've killed her!" Another man cried.

"She's fine, Paul." A woman chided.

And then the audience starts to speak up. As if I could get any more embarrassed.

"Joe killed our boss!"

"Who's Joe?"

"Who's our boss?"

"You're all stupid, she's breathing!"

"But who's our boss, anyways?"

The man got up and offered me a hand, which I took graciously. "Thanks," I muttered, keeping my head down. Why was everybody still staring? It wasn't like it was a car crash or anything.

I hate spotlights.

"Sorry." He said. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. It was my fault." I said, sheepishly.

The man raised his hands in the air. "She lives!"

There were a few hoots from the crowd, and then people started to get back to their tasks. Except at a God damned glacial pace.

I was helping 'Joe' pick up his trays, when I saw her. Alice was standing in front of me, arms crossed over her chest and a big, smug smile on her face.

Shoot me!

"I think that's three in counting." She said, chuckling.

I stacked the trays into Joe's arms. "Huh?" I asked.

"The number of times you're on the floor when I meet you." She said.

"Oh," I gushed, knowing my face had been red before and was even redder now. "That was . . . an accident."

"I'm going to buy you a helmet." She said.

"Wha-"

"Workplace safety." She laughs, tapping her temple.

We start walking back to the office, because by now I know that rebuilding another chair is futile. When we get to the hallway, however, Alice pulls me along in the wrong direction.

"Uhh, Alice - the meeting room is back there." I said, though I gave no resistance to her pull. Hell, she could be walking off a cliff and I'd let her drag me along.

"Don't tell me you're still thinking of working." Alice laughed, looking back at me over her shoulder. "You and I pretty much made this slack day possible."

That was true. This week we'd been workaholics on energizer batteries - never running out of juice. "We're leaving?" I asked.

"Yeah; unless you'd prefer to suntan on another 'lounge-chair'." She teased, and I blanched. Maybe I wasn't so hidden.

"Where we going?"

"You're house, duh."

I blinked. Why did she want to come to my house?

"Jasper will be happy that we're going back early. We haven't seen each other like, all week."

Oh, that's why.

We were coming up to the parking lot elevators when she she'd stopped suddenly. "Wait!" She cried.

I looked around, alarmed. "What?"

Then Alice was towing me back in the direction we came. "I have an idea before we go."

"Okay."

...

Alice, Rob (the control room operator), and I were pretty much in hysterics. My hand was pressed against the window for support, I was laughing so hard.

Alice had brought us back to the control room, and convinced Rob that this would be well worth his time. She proceeded to change the hue of all the main lights in the studio to blue, causing all the little people below to freeze and look around in confusion. Then she set the lights to alternate between colors, casting the entire venue into a seizure-worthy, disco-esque light spectacle.

Chaos broke out among the workers. Nobody knew whether this was a fire-drill, some weird lock down procedure, or just a hot chick messing around for shits and giggles; either way, the tiny people scurried around in a frenzy trying to figure out what was going on. Some people rushed to the exits, some stood dazed and looking up at the blinking ceiling, and some were trying to shut the lights off with the switches on ground floor.

Rob's transmitter hummed to life. "Rob? Rob there's something funky going on with the lights. What the hell did you do?"

Rob picked up his receiver and brought it to his mouth. "Relax, try to party." He said, with a very even, steady tone.

Alice and I laughed even harder as Rob tried to convince the person on the other line that this was 'better for the workers, and an encouraging working environment'.

"Rob!" The angry voice snarled. "Shut it off!"

Rob maintained his composure. "On the contrary; _no_."

"I am coming up there _right now!_" The voice said.

Rob smiled goofily at Alice and I.

"You're the best Rob. I'll vouch for you when your ass gets beaten." She promised.

"No problem, Alice. Get outta here before Hank throws us out this window." He said.

Alice planted a quick, chaste kiss on his cheek before pulling me out the door in a fit of giggles.

She seemed to be pulling me everywhere today.

...

"You're early." Cooper called from the kitchen as we entered the flat. His back was facing the door, and he was pouring over some work-related catalog. I ruffled his hair as I passed him, and immediately dove into our diminishing stash of Poptarts.

"So on the second meeting, you don't greet your guests?" Alice said, closing the door with a smirk. "I see how it is."

Cooper swiveled his head, and grinned at Alice. He walked over to hug her. "Oh, forgive me for my inaction; my lady. I normally greet lovely girls with warm embraces; however, I thought it was only Bella."

I scowled at him. "_So_ classy, Coop."

Cooper winked at me, and I flipped him the finger between bites of sugar.

Alice was amused with the exchange, and pointed at my Poptarts. "Those will kill you one day." She said.

I looked down at my treat, and shrugged. 22 years of death-worthy foods, and I was still a skinny pale chick. My body was just weird like that. "So will a lack of protein." I said, poking fun at her vegetarianism.

"Luckily, I suffer from neither." She said happily. "I eat a lot of nuts and beans."

"You eat a lot of _nuts_, eh?" Said Cooper, wiggling his eyebrows. "You enjoy them?"

Alice blinked at him, and I, once more, rolled my eyes. "Again, Coop._ So_ classy."

Cooper giggled - well, the male version of giggling. "I can't help it. And if you're looking for Jasper, he's in his room jacking off."

Alice and I exchanged glances, and in the silence we could hear music coming from the bedroom area.

"Actually, I think he's practicing the saxophone." Alice said.

Cooper shrugged. "His equivalent."

...

Well, Jasper screamed like a girl when we'd snuck up behind him. He gets really into his music, in a creepy trance-like fashion, and I suggested that Alice bite his ear to get his attention. The punch that followed his realization that I was the mastermind? Bruise material. The woman-shriek and horrified face when he'd been bitten? _Priceless_.

"You guys are mental, I thought that was _Cooper_!" He cried, still a little shaken. Alice and I, for the second time that day, were in stitches with laughter. "Why are you guys home so early, anyways? I mean, it's nice - real nice," He squeezed Alice's hand. "But you guys usually work late."

"Alice wreaked havoc in the workplace and we made a speedy escape." I supplied. It wasn't necessarily the truth, but then again, it wasn't far from it.

Jasper's eyebrows flew up. Then he grinned. "Impressive." He said, rubbing his nose against Alice's.

Ugh; Eskimo kisses. Time for me to leave.

I muttered a 'no loud noises' rule, and walked out of the room; shutting the door behind me. I can't believe how cool I was acting about all this. Not that Jasper had any reason to suspect I wouldn't be cool with it, but God damn, I was good. Key word: acting. Inside: kind of dying.

You know that feeling you get when you realize that you'll never be rich, you're only average, or that dreams just don't come true? Yeah, it was _that_ kind of feeling; that feeling of accepting a mediocre fate. Alice was like a lottery ticket, and the mathematical probability was simple - I just wasn't going to win.

C'est la fucking vie, right?

Cooper was just about to open our last box of Kraft Dinner when I walked into the kitchen. "Don't waste that," I said.

"You're kidding, right? It's KD. I'm hungry."

I made a face.

"Did you forget? Alice is cooking tonight."

"NOOOO!"

You'd think he was dying.

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**Please, just visualize it. Cooper sneaking up behind Jasper and biting his ear.**

**One big LOL. Enough said.  
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	7. Different Occasions for Panic

**three chapters, one weekend; I must love you guys.**

**You may not love me for the end of this chapter, though. :P**

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The tofu and spinach left our stomachs and took their respective places in the toilet bowl. And then we'd ordered Chinese.

Unfortunately, that night was one of many. Alice was over more often now, as her place was getting renovated; and Jasper did not hesitate to invite her and her leafy-green appetite over several times a week. We were all pretty much good friends by now - Jasper and Alice had integrated into our lives quite smoothly and were always welcomed company to me and Cooper's escapades. Jasper's band was getting more gigs as time went on; Alice was practically a flatmate, seeing as her bedroom was being worked on and she'd been sleeping at our house for the time being; and Cooper was a week away from publishing 'Bella and the Zombies'. Dandy days, right?

As for my job, you wouldn't believe what happened in the days following the shoot:

Two months ago

"Sir, you asked to see me?" I said, poking my head into Mr. Cline's office. I hadn't been there since my orientation day - what was this about? Maybe he didn't like our new approach to the campaign, or maybe he was going to assign me another project. Maybe he just wanted a latte.

"Yes, sit down Mrs. Swan." He motioned to the chair across from him, and I sat down gingerly. "I wanted to talk to you about something very important, and very serious."

"Sure." I replied. I smoothed out my skirt, hoping I wouldn't start sweating. He was scary, alright? Mr. Cline was a no bullshit, his-way type of guy. Me? I was disposable. Very, very disposable.

"I understand that on the last day of shooting, you and the venue-owner pulled a rather juvenile 'prank'." He started.

_Oh, crap.  
_

"- Hank went to shut down the lights, but ended up cutting the power to the whole studio for a few minutes."

My eyes widened, I suddenly knew why I was here. _He was firing me; I was getting fired!_

"Thus all the computers in the venue crashed, and we lost some very important documents. If we didn't lose them, then they became insecure because of the network disconnection."

_Goodbye career. Hello McDonalds._

"So I called you in to fire you."

_This world sucks! Everything sucks!_

"Sir, please; I've worked so hard on this project, I-"

'I'm not finished, Mrs. Swan." He said, quieting me instantly. "As I was saying, we lost some documents important to our campaign so we tried to retrieve the soft copies from our mainframe."

_Maybe there's hope? Maybe I should start crying. _

"We've recovered the files, and in the process became aware of a system malfunction. The I.T. looked into it, and discovered that this 'glitch' was the reason for our system failures in the recent weeks. The workers removed it and now our mainframe is clean and working perfectly fine."

_Huh?_

"If it wasn't for you and the venue owner, we would have never found it. We'd been looking in our network programming rather than our own system, and it was costing us millions of dollars."

_Keep a straight face, keep a straight face. Should I still start crying?_

"Therefore I'm giving you a promotion. Your internship is almost ended at our company, and you've done an excellent job with your current project - mind you, the new designs are great; I'd like to offer you a permanent job here at Target as part of our marketing team. There'll be an appropriate pay raise, and you'll get your own office."

_What._

"What do you say? Would you like to join Target?"

_There is a God._

Present time

That feeling of choosing to go into a glass box of poison, and realizing immediately after that you'd have to wait until someone lets you out. That was the feeling I was having right now, and I'm pretty sure it was mutual.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Cooper shrieked. "IT NEVER ENDS!"

I held onto whatever breath was left in my lungs as we went down yet another drop.

The new roller coaster at Six Flags boasted to be the longest, scariest ride in America; and it did not disappoint. Surely this couldn't be a three minute ride, it felt like we'd been strapped on for hours.

"CORKSCREW! TELL MY MOM I LOVE HER!" Cooper cried, as we spiraled through the third corkscrew of the ride.

Similar screams and deathbed wishes were emanating around me, some even coming from my own mouth. The only person who seemed to be enjoying this ride was Alice. Her and Jasper were in the seats in front of us, and Alice was laughing with her hands up. I could see Jasper hugging his seat guard with a death grip, being completely silent. When Jasper's silent, you just know he's panicking.

Finally, the ride slowed to a stop. Our seat guards released us and we all stepped out onto the platform. All at once we toppled over, because our feet were absolute jelly.

"That was amazing, let's do it again!" Laughed Alice, getting up and dragging Cooper and Jasper off the ground.

"That was death, multiplied." I said, getting up on my own accord.

"I think I shat myself." Cooper muttered, shaking out his curly hair. The wind had given him an irreversible middle part, and it was just not flattering.

We followed Alice to the exit, stopping to look at the picture that had been taken somewhere during the ride.

"We should get a copy." Alice said happily.

I raised an eyebrow at her. The picture was of our group of seats, and nobody except Alice looked decently alright. Jasper's hair had been blown back behind his head, making him look bald; Cooper was mid-scream, nostrils flared; and I had one eye closed, one ridiculously wide open, and a double chin. Alice looked like she was at a dinner party - she'd even smiled for the snapshot.

"Absolutely not. Let's never relive that." I told her. "Plus, those pictures cost like $15."

"Yes, but, as you've so graciously dubbed me, I'm the 'rich bitch' - right?" She said, smirking over at me. Of course I didn't have to say anything, Alice had a knack for getting her way. She bought a copy of the hideous picture and Jasper stored it in his satchel.

"You don't look so great, Jazz." Cooper said to him.

"Yeah, honey; you're really pale." Said Alice, placing a hand on his chest.

Pale might not have been the right word. Sweaty, flustered, and looking like he was about to vomit was more like it. Who would've thought the Cowboy had the softest stomach of us all?

"I'm just feeling a little nauseous." Jasper said, snaking his arms around his torso. His eyes widened and suddenly he was on his heel, scurrying towards the washroom. "I'll be back!"

Cooper shrugged. "Give us some man time." He said to us, chasing after his friend.

I looked to Alice, who looked at me, and we walked out to wait for them on the bench.

I'm just glad it wasn't me about to projectile vomit.

"That roller coaster got him good." Alice said.

I chuckled. "Actually, I think it was the soy-burger you fed him at lunch."

"Soy burgers rock; you can't even taste the difference!"

"Yeah . . . if you have no taste buds."

"Maybe it's just an acquired thing."

"Maybe it's just an Alice thing." I countered, and we both laughed. Some people just aren't cut out for vegetarianism, I guessed.

Cooper and Jasper were taking a long time in the washroom, and I was perfectly content with talking to Alice.

I just wasn't prepared for the outlandish question that came next.

"So are you gay?" Alice asked me, and I nearly dropped the purse I was sifting through. My mouth opened and closed without any sound; I was completely taken aback.

"Wha-what?" I asked, feeling my heart beat in my ears. Where did that come from? Did she know? Does she know? Great, now I'm the one about to barf.

"I was just wondering, since you never talk about any guys."

I frowned. "I never talk about any girls, either."

"So you're straight?"

"Of course I am!"

"You're not dating anyone, though?"

"You'd know if I was."

Alice mused about this. _Okay, she's just curious - girls like to gossip, right? This doesn't mean anything. _

"Why did you assume I was gay?"

Alice laughed. "You wear a lot of plaid."

"Seriously?"

"That among other things."

"_What_ things?"

"Things." She said casually. I was about to press for more information, but she changed the subject. "So what did you do for Valentine's Day?"

Right, another random question. Maybe I didn't get out enough to know how normal conversations go, or maybe Cooper and I just spoke the same language and thus the normal world didn't make sense to me anymore. But hell, I'll go with the flow.

"Uhh, I went out with Ben and Ange."

Alice giggled. "You went out with Ben and Ange?"

"Why's that funny? We went out for dinner."

"Don't you think that's kind of an awkward, third-wheel situation?"

"What, no; they were fine with it and . . . Oh,"

I hadn't really thought about that at the time, since us three were so close - but now that I looked back, they did seem to think it was weird when I suggested we all go out together. Alice laughed again, and I guessed the mental picture of the two lovebirds having a candlelight dinner, and then me randomly sitting there could be quite comical. "Well, what did _you_ do on Valentine's Day?"

"I went out with Jasper, he did something sweet."

Sweet? Right, I bet I could _so _out do him. "What did he do?"

Alice smiled, seeming to take herself back to that night. "Well, he's got friends in the NYPD and got them to seal off a part in Times Square; so we had a picnic there. It was really cool because the place is usually shoulder-to-shoulder busy, and then there we were on our little patch of empty space, with a picnic blanket and some wine. Jasper also got his band to play for us, which was really nice. Then we took a carriage through Central Park, and it brought us to Tiffany's where Jasper let me pick out a ring. After that, Jasper had rented a small boat and we kind of just floated off into the night."

Oh my God, fuck her and her perfect life and perfect boyfriend and perfect face. That's it; I'm going to be a nun. I shall give up my career, and be a nun.

"That sounds great."

Wait.

A ring? Jasper let her pick out a ring!

"HOLD UP; Jasper got you a ring? Why?"

Alice grinned. "Technically, he just let me pick it out. He wanted to make sure I'd have the one I wanted when he decided to get it-"

"Get it for what? Alice - is Jasper proposing to you?"

_Panic_. That's probably the best word to describe my brain right now. It would also describe my stomach, the lump in my throat, the stones in my lungs, and pretty much everything else except for my face. A scary-looking attempt at a smile was fixed on my features. I think I might have been twitching.

Alice leaned in and whispered to me. "He plans to; we've been talking about it. He says he's gonna do it when 'the time's right'; but I think he's gonna do it on our year and a half anniversary."

As I tried not to hyperventilate, and look somewhat casual, Jasper and Cooper were walking up to us; ending the current conversation. We walked over towards the food court, because boys are always hungry. Jasper was chatting happily to Alice, and I was having my own inner monologue.

_Jasper and Alice are going to get married._

_No, no, no, no . . . And they've only been dating for a year and a half anyways! Alice doesn't know what she wants! Does she?_

_Am I wronging Jasper by not wanting them to get married? _

_Do I need an education to be a nun?  
_

_I can't deal with this. I need to get out._

"Bella, you want to come to the comic book convention next week?" Cooper asked me. As I looked at him, he arched his eyebrow. He knew something was wrong; nothing I do gets past him.

"I don't think so."

"Why not?"

"I'm going to Boston, I want to visit Jacob."

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**I promise you'll like Jacob. :)**


	8. One Cullen to the Next

**Enjoy! **

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"You have no idea how long it's been, since I've had a _real_ meal." I said, biting into the steak and relishing every second of it.

Jacob laughed, bringing a plate of porkchops to the table. I told him I wanted a meaty meal when I arrived, and he really went all out. Pork, steak, lamb, and KD - pretty much my four food groups. "And that's because of-"

"Alice; she's a vegetarian."

"Right, the girlfriend that you share with Jasper."

I shot him a look, over my food. "Yeah right, I wish."

Jacob poured me some orange juice, and finally sat down with me. "So let me get this straight. You're not straight."

"Sort of."

"- because of Alice."

"Yes."

"- who's getting married to Jasper."

"Unfortunately."

"- and now you're here, because?"

"Because I can't stand being around them." I said, exasperated. I sighed, feeling my suppressed word vomit resurface. "I can't deal with them being together, literally all day and all night since she's practically 'moved in'. She's everywhere and I hate it. I hate her fucking vegetarian dinners that we all eat to make her happy; I hate the way she gets whatever the hell she wants whenever she wants; I hate how I can't say no to her; and I hate her face because it's lovely. God, and I feel like it's not fair because everyone does so much for her, and makes so many sacrifices; while she does nothing for us except look pretty." I spat, knowing I was getting worked up. I felt a tinge of guilt, seeing as this was our reunion meal and here I was being Donnie Darko. "Sorry, this whole thing just makes me angry sometimes. And I have to wear this happy mask all day back at the house, which gets me even more riled up."

Jacob nodded carefully. "No problem, let it all out. I think I understand what you're feeling though; you see, it's easier to be angry at someone, than to want them."

"No, I've decided that I don't care."

Jacob scratched his non-existent goatee. "You know what that tells me?"

"What?"

"That you care. You care very, very much."

I grumbled as I shoveled more food into my mouth. Stupid Jacob and his stupid wisdom.

I was staying at Jacob's for the week, having told my boss I was attending a funeral in order to get the days off. Technically, we were in Ashland, not Boston; but it was close enough and I planned to be in the city often. Jacob lived on the border of the Ashland reservation, in a cabin by a lake. The property was surrounded by one of the few virgin forests we had left, and it was absolutely breathtaking. I knew this would be the perfect place to come and clear my mind. Not only that, but Jacob was a guy whom is acutely aware of emotions and body language - he's the type of friend that'll let you have your time alone if he thinks you need it. He also won't ask questions that you don't want to answer.

I wanted to Alice-detox, hence the hopping on a train and cabbing to Jacob's humble abode. Maybe I'd read a book or go fishing with Jacob - either way, I just wanted to be ridiculously busy. Lucky for me, the reservation and the city itself had a lot of activities to offer.

Yeah, this place was exactly what I needed.

...

I carried the planks of wood towards Jacob. We both didn't trust myself to handle a saw, or any sharp objects for that matter; and so I was just being the muscle.

"Can you grab the measuring tape from the shed?" Jacob asked me. He was currently in the process of making new windows for the boathouse.

That old boathouse had been wrecked for years, and no one had put the effort into fixing it. With Jacob's new boat almost built, he decided that, with my help, now was the perfect time to do so. Seth was supposed to rebuild it with him last week, but he had broken his ankle on a hiking trip. That's where I came in.

"Where is it?" I called, looking around. I pulled a sheet off a table to look underneath it, only to discover that it was a motorcycle. "Whoa Jacob, you ride a motorbike?"

I found the measuring tape, and ran back out to where Jacob was standing.

"That old thing? Yeah, but its pretty much ancient, it's been sitting there for years. I usually just take the truck."

"You should teach me to ride it."

"You really want to learn?"

I nodded. "I want to do something new; you know, change my pace."

Jacob chuckled. "If you want, I'll check to see that it still runs and maybe we can take it for a spin. You have to promise not to die, though."

"That not really on my agenda."

"No, but things have a habit of getting on your agenda all by themselves."

...

I walked through Boston, glad I hadn't brought a coat. It was pretty hot and sunny out, and my body seemed to have an affinity for sweating. The Harvard campus was nearby, so I decided to check it out. The campus, though I had been there before, was always a lovely place to be. The Victorian style buildings and well-groomed courtyards had a welcoming vibe to them, and I parked myself under a tree to read my book.

After about an hour of Jane Austen, the heat was begging me to get a drink. I walked into one of the main buildings; surely there was a food court somewhere.

"Excuse me, is there a food court in one of these buildings?" I asked a man at the information desk.

The man made a face. "Yes, it's right behind you."

"Oh," I turned around to see various food boutiques. "Thanks."

I walked towards the Subway, which was the nearest shop when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"I thought it was you."

I jumped up, and did my best to contain my shriek. "Oh my God, don't do that!" I hissed.

Edward grinned crookedly. "Nice to see you too."

"You almost made me crap myself. I thought you were-"

"A rapist? Maybe a murderer?" He asked, still grinning.

"Yes. No. Maybe; I don't know." I said sheepishly.

"I doubt someone would try to kill you in the middle of Harvard."

"_I'm _going to kill you in the middle of Harvard."

"I doubt that too." He laughed. This was random, not to mention absurd; Edward was the last person I expected to meet in Boston. I didn't hate him, but I certainly didn't like him. The way he was standing indicated that he had no intention of leaving. "Would you like a lunch buddy?"

So here I was, eating the meatiest sandwich they had on the menu, while Edward nibbled on salad. Yeah, there was something wrong with that picture. It was the third day of my intended Alice-boycott, and I was already having lunch with her brother. I have now lost faith in the theory of mathematical probability. It just doesn't apply to my life.

"You don't look like a meat-eater." Edward stated.

"And you don't look like a vegan." I said back to him. This time around, Edward had turned his excessive flirting down, something that I was grateful for. Perhaps it was because he wasn't drunk. Whatever the reason, this conversation was quite a bit more enjoyable.

"Looks can be deceiving." He said. "So what brings you to Boston?"

"I'm visiting a friend; he lives on the reservation." I told him. "How about you?"

A meatball fell out of my sandwich and onto my lap. Edward grinned, and slid a napkin across the table.

"I'm here for medical school."

I wiped away the sauce, cursing because it was only spreading out. "Really? But you've got the studios don't you?"

Edward laughed. "Yeah, I do. That thing runs on its own though, I'm pretty much bored all day. I've got nothing but time, and I like helping people. Doctorate, here I come."

"Impressive," I said. "Is Alice doing schooling too?"

Edward nodded. "She did part-time at Julliard."

"_Julliard_?" I breathed. Man, there was so much I didn't know about this girl. She's artsy too? "What for?"

"Drawing. She stopped, though. I don't know why; but she hasn't picked up her sketchbook in a while."

"Again, impressive."

Two rich kids, two prestigious schools. Can somebody say _perfect life_?

"What are you doing tonight?" Edward asked me.

I groaned internally. Was this the part where he asks me out again?

"I'm busy."

"Doing what?"

"Jacob and I are rebuilding his boathouse. He's kind of swamped because the guy who was going to help him, broke his ankle."

Edward grinned. God, there was that face again - the one that told me I was going to end up spending my afternoon with him.

"Then he wouldn't mind if I helped out. You came here by taxi, right?"

"Uhh,"

I was supposed to be avoiding the Cullens, not affiliating with them!

Edward picked up his tray. "Then I'll drive."

...

Well, at least the day wasn't fruitless. Edward turned out to know much more about architecture than I did, and he and Jacob had hit it off well. They were discussing something about drainage pipes, and I stood there being useless. Eventually, I went back into the house to cook the boys some dinner. I chuckled to myself evilly, because Jacob generally had nothing but meat in his fridge. Edward could either join the meat party, or nibble on the single turnip Jacob had. I looked out the window as I was washing the chicken.

Jacob was laughing as he hovered over Edward, who was trying to cut a plank though his saw kept getting stuck. Jacob was generally alone out in these woods, save the Quilette boys who came by sometimes during the week. It was good to see him making friends outside his circle.

"Would you like to stay the night?" Jacob asked, as dinner was being served.

I placed the single, tiny turnip in front of Edward laughing inwardly. Like a good guest, he thanked me profusely for the wonderful meal.

"No, I have to get home tonight; I didn't even tell Alice I would be out."

I froze. "Alice is here?"

Jacob seemed very amused by this, and I shot him a glare to silence his chuckles.

"Yes, she's in town for a few days. You guys are friends right? You should visit her, she's staying at my place."

Great. Just what I needed. _Why_ did she have to bombard my life everywhere I went? I could go to Zimbabwe on a peace mission and find her there.

"I don't think so." I said. Alice was the last person I wanted to see on my trip here. Couldn't she go ruin someone else's vacation?

"Did you guys have a fight?" Edward asked.

I shook my head. "No."

"Then you should visit her." Edward said. "She always loves company."

"Yeah, Bella - you should." Jacob added, nodding to me. He was supposed to be on my side - what is this blasphemy!

Couldn't the 'all-wise' Jacob see that that was a recipe for disaster? I sighed; if one thing was for sure, it was that I would absolutely _not_ visit Alice.

Nobody was going to change my mind.

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**Well, well, well; the predicaments Bella gets herself into . . .**


	9. Hopping Back On

**It's a bit short, but I liked writing this chapter. **

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Of all people, _why _did Jacob have to invite Edward back to work on the boathouse? Of course, Edward took the offer with much enthusiasm, and went as far as to say that he'd be sure to see the project finished. They liked each other way too much, and it was agitating.

Not only that, but lone behold; Edward _also_ knows how to ride a motorcycle. _Is there anything the Cullens can't do?_ After Jacob informed Edward of my wanting to learn, they insisted on taking out the old bike and teaching me. It might've been my sixth fall that day, or it might've been my hundredth. I stopped counting.

"Bella," Jacob said, chasing after me. I had walked away from them when they'd insisted I have another go.

"You're right - I'm going to die on that thing. I think I'll take up knitting." I said, still walking away.

Jacob grabbed my arm, lightly, and spun me around. He offered me a small smile. "This isn't about the bike, is it?" He asked.

Oh Jacob, how observant. "No, it obviously is not." I said. I made a mental note not to sound too angry - they were only trying to help, right?

"Then why don't you give it another go, you've almost got it." He said.

"What's the point? I'm going home in three days, and I won't have a bike there anyways."

Jacob sighed and sat me down on a nearby log. Sometimes I felt like he was my father; which was really weird considering he was younger than me. "It's about wanting something, and not giving up on it; regardless of how hard it seems." He said softly.

"I didn't want to ride it _that _badly, you guys kind of forced me into it today."

Jacob chuckled. "I'm not talking about the bike, now."

"Oh,"

"It's pretty strange that things turned like this, with Edward and all. Isn't it?" He said.

I nodded at him. "You can say that again."

"What do you think about it?"

"It sucks." I said. Jacob didn't have to be a psychic to figure that one out.

He did a throaty hum, and looked back at Edward who was waiting for us patiently by the bike.

"Coincidences, eh?" I asked, though it was more like a statement. And if it was a statement, then it'd be an understatement.

"Maybe not." Jacob replied.

"What do you mean?"

Jacob chuckled, and swung his arm around my shoulder.

"You live a busy life in New York, Bella. When you're doing too many things, meeting too many people, you sometimes start to miss the big picture."

"I'm not following you, Jacob."

"Exactly."

"Exactly, what?" I asked. Jacob sometimes talked in circles, and I wasn't really in the mood for Yoda.

"Life is just a chain of events, isn't it?"

"I guess so."

"No, it _is_. You wake up in the morning because you went to sleep the night before, you went to sleep because you came home from work, you came home from-"

"I get it, Jacob." I said, cutting him off.

"Alright, alright. I'm just saying; everything that happens, leads to another thing that happens."

"Which leads to another thing, which leads to another thing." I said, getting tired of this. "What's your point?"

Jacob smiled at me. "These 'coincidences'; where are they leading _you_?"

I shuffled my feet. Jacob was searching my eyes with genuine kindness, and I was searching myself for an answer to this ridiculous problem.

I sighed. "I don't know, Jacob."

Jacob grinned, and ruffled my hair. "Then you'll find out, won't you?" He said, springing up to his feet. "Come on, give it another go!" He said, ushering me back towards the bike.

I shook my head; why do people always get their way with me?

"Fine."

...

Day three of Edward's presence, and I actually didn't mind him. Jacob convinced me that there was no point in 'being glum' about things I couldn't change, and I guess I owed it to him to be open-minded. Plus, Jacob and Edward were getting along really well, and seemed to enjoy each other's company quite a bit. They'd already planned a hunting trip together in the coming weeks when I'd be gone.

The boys were installing the doors onto the boathouse, and discussing car engines - a conversation I had nothing to add to. Instead of helping them; aka, standing around for the most part, I decided to take Jacob's boat for a trip around the lake. Time alone gave me an opportunity to think things through. I sighed.

So I had it bad for Alice Cullen.

Real bad.

Here I was taking a vacation to _stop_ having it bad her. That's exactly how deep I was.

Those years of Disney movies were a lie. Love wasn't some big, fun adventure; people don't meet their soul mates and run off to get married, singing along the way. I let my head connect with the steering wheel of the boat, with a satisfying groan from my own mouth.

Now I was talking about love. How pathetic am I?

I wasn't in love with Alice - I couldn't be. Sure, I had a planet-size infatuation with her from the moment our eyes met; but that was that . . . right?

I mean, just because my heart thumps every time she smiles, and I can't get a coherent thought to turn into a coherent sentence when she's around, that's not love. That's just nerves. Just because I fall asleep with her on my mind, and wake up right where the thought left off; that's just because I was thinking too much. Staying behind late, those days at the studio to finish the project - that was just me working hard. Trying to eat vegetables when Alice was around for meals, it was me being healthy. Checking on her room when she fell asleep before Jasper got home; that's me being . . . Protective?

Okay, maybe not.

Who was I kidding. I was in love with Alice Cullen. If I wasn't in love, then I was in deep like. I should just stop denying it - acceptance is the first step to moving on. Not only did I want to accept it, but I wanted to scream it from the rooftop of Jacob's house so the whole world could hear - I was in love with Alice Cullen. There, said it. I was in love with Alice and as much as it sucked, as much as it was tearing me apart, I liked the feeling. I really, really liked the feeling.

Screw Disney and its lies! I was strapped onto this roller coaster, and I was strapped on with Alice. Somebody once told me that once you get over the fear of being on the ride, then you realize that feeling the fear is the fun part. Okay, fine - it was Jacob who said that.

What a smart ass. He was seriously my fairy godmother.

Alright, so what was I supposed to do? Obviously, 'turning off' my love was not an option. Coming clean? I doubt that'd go off too well:

_"Oh hey, Alice? Yeah, I really hate when you cook dinner but I eat it so that you'll like me. Also, I'm in love with you. I'm in la la la love. Can you please not marry Jasper, turn gay, and start loving me back? Please?"_

I will swallow a live fish before I say those words to her.

Sighing, I decided it was time to head back. I'd been gone for quite a while, and it was starting to get dark out. Bella on a boat, trapped in a lake during the night? Not something I was looking forward to.

I drove the boat back to the doc, marveling at the wildlife around me. America seriously needed to have more virgin forests, this place was beautiful. I really wouldn't be surprised if I found a leprechaun prancing around these woods; or maybe a unicorn.

I walked into the house, and Jacob was cutting up some vegetables. Edward was putting potatoes in a pot, and the two were laughing as I entered.

"You mean to tell me that you seriously walked five miles, carrying nothing but a watermelon?" Edward said, smiling in a way that the skin beside his eyes wrinkled.

Jacob laughed. "I'm completely serious. Nobody wanted to pick me up off the road, I was totally a damsel in distress."

I smirked, I've heard this story before. "Did he get to the part where he tripped walking up his steps, and the watermelon smashed on the concrete?"

Edward nearly doubled over with laughter. "It didn't!"

"It so did."

"Way to ruin the climax, Bella!" Jacob said. Like a two year old, I stuck my tongue out at him.

I opened the fridge to get myself a beer, and immediately noticed the multitudes of vegetables and fruits. "You went shopping." I stated. Of course he would, what _wouldn't_ he do for his dearest new friend, Edward? It was almost laughable.

"Well, I had to prepare for the vegetarians in the house tonight." Jacob said, smirking.

Oh, God; I didn't like that smirk. No! If he did . . . oh, I hope he likes me shoving his face into potatoes. "Vegetarians, _plural_?" I croaked.

"What kind of friend would I be, if I didn't invite Edward's sister over for dinner? She's come to visit _him_ after all, and he's been eating here for her entire trip."

Edward smiled at me, completely oblivious to this terrible ploy that Jacob had cooked up. "She's stoked, Bells." He said.

I literally slammed my palm into my face.

"Jacob! You little . . ."

I heard her Porsche before it entered the driveway.

* * *

**Om om om, broccoli!**


	10. Lake Water, Among Other Things

**I'll say it over and over again. I love this story.**

* * *

When life gives you lemons, squeezes it in your eyes, and then tells you to make lemonade; you go and wash that shit out, saying you'd rather have oranges.

"Oranges, please." I said to Edward.

He was holding up an assortment of fruit, asking what type of dessert I wanted. Really, it shouldn't have been called dessert; but it was the closest I was going to get to a box of Oreos.

Typically, I'm a slow eater. Tonight, I scarfed that shit down like my chair was on fire. Of course, when I'd rushed into my room, I shouldn't have been surprised that Alice followed me. I shouldn't have been surprised that she proceeded to tell me about her day, how crazy it was that I'd run into Edward, and how awesome she thought Jacob was. Presumably, I'd be okay with this - talking about anything and everything was something I'd done with her countless times before; but now I was all too aware of how close on the bed she was sitting to me, how she had a single strand of hair that rested on her eyebrow, begging to be put into place, and how she was wearing designer clothes in a log cabin, literally in the middle of a forest.

"You didn't tell me that you went to Julliard." I said. I was lying down on my mattress, head on a pillow; and Alice was lying down beside me, head at the foot of my bed. It seemed appropriate, I thought, to have our heads on complete opposite sides.

"It wasn't a big part of my life, I don't talk about it much." She said, tangling up her fingers, then untangling them.

"College?" I breathed. "That's a huge part of life."

"I didn't like it." She said, looking like she wanted to drop the subject.

If I were polite, I wouldn't have pressed the subject. Except I wasn't polite, I was in love. "Why not?"

"It just wasn't for me." Alice responded.

Again with these vague answers! Was I missing something? Alice had never talked about Julliard before, which I thought was weird because Julliard is an impressive school. In fact, it's _the_ most impressive school for fine arts - who wouldn't boast about that, or even mention it? I couldn't help but think she wanted to keep something hidden.

"There must be a reason, right? Most people love college."

Alice sighed, propping herself up on her elbows to look at me. "The college was great." She said slowly. "It's just the people that I met . . ." She trailed off.

Alright, so I was at least getting somewhere.

"Have you ever been in love?" She asked me. A little off-put by her question, I managed to nod in reply. I could only hope she wouldn't ask whom I was referring to. "Then you know how it feels, right? Doing anything and everything for someone, just because you could."

_Oh, how appropriate_. Did she know she was describing my life right now?

"- and just because something is wrong, or just because it's not supposed to happen; you do it anyways. Anything to get closer to that person."

I could only nod. I knew that feeling all too well, and the familiarity of it churned my stomach to bits.

Alice continued, seeming reluctant. "Well, when I went to Julliard-"

The door opened, and Edward stuck his head into the room.

_Oh my God_, _go away_!

"Hey girls! Enough chatting, come watch the game with us."

How awkward would it be if I punched him right now? Would slamming the door be appropriate?

"Who's playing?" Alice asked.

"Knicks versus Celtics." He responded.

And because Boston was playing New York, Alice nearly teleported to the television set; effectively ending our conversation before I could get anything slightly substantial. Edward's untimely entrance had made me temporarily hate him. Screw this world! . . . And all males for that matter.

So from what I had gathered, Alice had fallen in love with _someone _during her schooling at Julliard. I didn't know who this someone was, but it seemed to have a big impact on her. Suddenly, I felt the need to find out the rest of her story. As if, somehow, this missing piece of information would complete the picture of what was Alice Cullen. It was like a nag, an itch that I couldn't find - maybe it was nothing, but for some reason I felt like it was important.

This new found anxiety prevented me from getting really immersed into the game, like the others. I couldn't even rub it in Jacob's face that the Knicks had kicked the Celtic's ass, because I was in another world. Or say, a glass box of emotion. People could see me, I could see them, but the interaction was just mindless actions.

Why did I have to hang onto every word that this girl said? It was probably nothing.

The night went on at an excruciatingly slow pace, and finally Edward mentioned how late it was getting, and how they'd better go. My escape was short-lived, however, as they promised to be here tomorrow morning to finish up the boathouse. As if we wouldn't be seeing each other for another month, everyone hugged everyone. Even Jacob got a hug from Edward, and I swear it was border line bro-mance.

When the siblings had left, I let myself topple onto the couch in a sigh of relief. Jacob towered over me with a smirk.

"Stop with that goofy smile." I told him, and he only smiled bigger.

"Only when you stop with yours."

Maybe I hadn't noticed the huge grin that had spread across my face. I tried my best to scowl.

"Admit it, you liked her company." Jacob said.

I rolled over to hide my face in the cushions, away from searching eyes. "Not as much as you enjoyed Edward's." I said, knowing it was a stretch. What's a desperate girl supposed to do?

"He's a good guy." Jacob said, sitting down on the couch beside me. He maneuvered my legs to make space for himself, putting me in the fetal position. Well, I guess that's exactly how I felt - like a baby. A big baby, crying for attention.

I don't need to say from who.

...

I woke up, tangled into Jacob like a pretzel. I don't know how I managed to get trapped between the couch and his massive legs, but I did know that my body wasn't supposed to bend that way.

Trying to escape by gently pushing him off me, he fell to the ground with an '_oof!_'

"Sorry, bro." I said to the still-sleeping Jacob. It must've been the beers we downed last night.

With the day young, my books being read, and Jacob _still_ snoring; I decided to go on another boat ride. I guess I was hoping for another epiphany.

I was out on the doc, untying the boat when a familiar hum of an engine could be heard nearby. It wasn't long until Alice and Edward appeared in the driveway and they walked up to greet me. Similar hello's were exchanged, and Edward held up a six-pack of beer.

"Since I think we emptied your fridge last night." He said. What a smart boy; alcohol was the first step to making friends.

"Speaking of that, Jacob's in a beer coma. His snoring has been intensified."

"The horror!" Edward cried, in faux-suffering. We all giggled, and I suggested Edward go wake him up with handful of ice cubes.

Thinking the idea was Nobel Prize material, Edward rushed into the house. I laughed because seeing Edward on a mission was kind of like seeing a squirrel on crack.

Where did that leave me? - standing on the doc with Alice. I looked at her, not really knowing what to say; but as usual, the girl didn't miss a beat.

"So you're taking that thing out?" Alice said, indicating the boat.

I scratched the back of my neck, wishing she didn't look so cute today. "I was planning to." Technically, I was planning to drive it away, off the face of the earth. In reality, I just wanted to be away long enough to breathe Cullen-free air. Obviously, my life is not and movie and good things just don't happen.

As if that was invitation enough, Alice hopped into the passenger seat; telling me to hurry up. I let myself smile, shaking my head as I got into the boat and revved the engine.

This girl was such trouble.

...

Being with someone you didn't want to be without, yet wanting to be without them when you couldn't be with them, was more or less a complicated situation. One should think that any person with a feasible amount of brain power, would logically just walk away from said situation. But what if said situation follows you around like a shadow?

Oh yeah, and the shadow was the size of a building.

I wish I was Harry Potter, so I could put on my handy dandy cloak of invisibility and hide under a rock. Any rock would be fine, really. Even the one our boat was stuck on.

"You're gonna have to do it." Alice muttered, as we peered over the edge of the boat.

Having been enthralled by the forestry around us, we had decided to turn off the engine and let ourselves drift. After a while of simple musing, we then realized that we had drifted right into a patch of seaweed and one, evil rock. Yes, the rock was evil - why else would it do this to us?

"No way, seaweed is gross and I'll probably drown!" I complained, absolutely _not_ wanting to get into that water.

"Bella, the water doesn't go past your shoulders."

"You'd be surprised at my drowning abilities."

"I'll save you."

"With my luck? Impossible."

Alice crossed her arms, and pouted. I made the effort to ignore the adorableness.

"Fine, we'll just be stuck here forever . . . I don't have a life to live or anything."

"Drama queen."

"I'm sure the studio will be fine without me . . ."

"I'm not going in."

"My clothes will be donated to better use."

"Alice-"

"I shall live with the fish and water plants, eating bark for sustenance."

"You really think I'm going to dive into the tick-infested, fish-inhabited water, probably drown, probably break my foot, probably never resurface, all for _you_?"

Alice batted her eyelashes.

"_Please_?"

It was disgusting. The seaweed in the toes, the algae in my hair, the everything-about-being-in-the-water-because-of-Alice. Damn her persuasion skills! Of course, all it had taken was the simple, unconsciously seductive act of facing me and blinking, to get me to dive in. But she was still to blame.

I got to work, ripping the seaweed from the propellers - it had winded around in a fluffy green knot when I'd tried to drive us out of there. The dirty task was made a little bit better with Alice's cheerleading, but I promised myself I would so get her back for this. With green bits in between my nails, I finally got the propeller free. I held onto the back of the boat, and used my legs to push against the rock and send the boat into clear water. Success!

"Happy, now?" I asked her, swimming up to the boat, and grabbing onto the side.

Alice did her best fan-girl smile. "My hero!"

I really shouldn't have grinned so much at her response. It wasn't normal.

As I hung onto the edge of the boat, an amusingly evil idea came to mind.

"Help me up, will you?" I asked her, holding my hand out.

Alice grabbed my hand, and started to pull. "No probl- _AH_!"

I dragged her into the water and she fell in with a satisfactory splash.

"You're going to die!" She said, resurfacing with laughter.

"I predicted that, didn't I?" I said, just as a gallon of water splashed into my open mouth. I spit it out, knowing I probably ingested half a million different species of bacteria, and splashed her back. "Oh, it's _so_ on."

* * *

**When I see the word splash, I think of a Magikarp (sp?). **


	11. Whispers

**Dear anonymous reviewer. You are anonymous and I can't send you a message, but I appreciate that you're reviewing individual chapters. A lot of people either don't review, or review the story as a whole - people like you make me happy :D**

**I seriously take all your feedback into consideration as I write!**

**I think you'll like this chapter.  
**

**

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**

"You're generally supposed to stay _in_ the boat." Edward said as we walked onto the doc, dripping wet.

I looked over at Alice. "Apparently_ somebody_ has a knack for disregarding rules."

"Hey, you started it!" She defended.

We made our way to the house in a fit of giggles, and you'd wonder if we were really in our twenties.

I gave Alice a towel, and found it very amusing that despite the cloth used for _drying_, she chose to shake out her hair like a dog. Her weirdness was compatible with mine.

I shuffled through my luggage, trying to find something decent for her to wear. I owned nothing designer, and she was just going to have to deal with that. Pondering the passing day as I picked out some warm pants, I wondered how I'd found it so easy to be with her. Wasn't it only this morning that I'd tried to get on a boat and escape from this girl, let alone have a water fight with her? I guessed it was because Jasper wasn't here. For some reason, him being around was the equivalent of him being a brick wall between Alice and I. I could make an educated guess as to what was on the other side, but I neither made the effort to climb the wall nor find out for myself, exactly what was behind it.

With Jasper out of the picture, even if only temporarily; it didn't feel like there was some huge blockade in the path of a 'forbidden' area. I didn't feel so bad just being myself, for once. Maybe I'm a terrible friend, but I'll admit that liked it this way.

"What's with you and plaid?" Alice asked, as I handed her the clothes.

Well, I can't say I didn't see that comment coming. "Take the clothes, or run around naked." I warned, indicating that she wasn't going to get to choose her outfit.

"Somebody's a little defensive." She said, taking the clothes from my hands and giving a slight bow before closing the door to the bathroom.

She was really cute, all swallowed up in my big shirt and baggy sweat pants. I definitely like that shirt better on her, than on myself.

After trying help out Edward and Jacob, and nearly wrecking everything they'd been working on; the boys assured us that they could finish their project on their own. They also assured us that they had nothing against girls, but the two of us were completely incapable with a hammer. I didn't mind one bit, seeing as we'd resolved on putting in a scary movie, and I was now curled up on a couch with the girl of my dreams. Literally - don't think I've never dreamed of this girl before.

"That's bullshit," She said, extending her hand towards the television. "If you know somebody's _died_ in there, they who in their right mind would go after them?"

I grinned. "Well, he _was_ in love."

"Oh yes, let's walk into the creepy, dark tunnel because my love is in there." She mimicked.

I smiled at her. "I would."

Alice looked at me thoughtfully. "Really?"

If it were her, _yes_. Would I trip over my feet before I even entered the tunnel? Probably; but I'd still go in. "I think so."

"Keep in mind, there's an axe murderer hiding in the shadows."

I chuckled. "Well, seeing as today we've found out that I'm unbeatable, yes I would. I'd show that crazy lumberjack who's boss."

"You know what's funny?" She asked me.

"What?"

"That you think you won that water fight."

I grinned at her. "I did win it."

"Maybe in _your_ mind. But you know what else is funny?"

"What?"

"That Jacob's about to get his revenge."

"Huh?" I looked up in time to see Edward and Jacob holding a pail of ice water over my head.

Looks like I'd be changing twice today.

...

What had previously been dubbed a 'tragedy' was quickly becoming the best coincidence ever. Who knew that running into Edward would reward me with two days and two nights of Alice Cullen, Jasper-free? Scrap the whole detox idea, I was sucking up her presence like osmosis.

After Jacob had so graciously given me a living-room shower, he realized that now his cushions and couch were all wet. The four of us carried the couch outside to dry, and laid down a blanket in its stead. Putting it to use, Edward's fabbity-fab dinner of mushrooms, radish, and cabbage rolls filled with cabbage, was eaten on the blanket in picnic-style. Turns out we were too cool for the dinner table anyways.

Sorry, I said fabbity-fab dinner, didn't I? I meant terrible, shame for the rest of your life, dinner. Due to my protests towards the shitty meal, a food fight soon broke out and we were pretty much all in grade school again. Jacob and I teamed up against Alice and Edward, and the territory wars began. Needless to say, my throwing skills were worse than a toddlers, and I was soon taken as a prisoner of war. They were terrible to me, really. Didn't they know mushrooms just don't come out of hair easily? Jacob rescued me in exchange for his own freedom, but in the end team Alice and Edward had completely annihilated us. Maybe that's why I was always last to be picked for sports teams.

Because Jacob lived alone, and because he only had one shower, we were all forced to take turns. Edward had already finished his, and Jacob was currently washing away what was supposed to be his dinner. I was sitting in my room, with Alice musing over the ridiculous amount of cabbage that managed to embed itself into my hair.

"Stop moving," She commanded me, and immediately I complied. "There's so much food, your hair is like a fridge."

"Because I'm so cool, right?" I said, smiling at my own joke.

"Right. _So_ cool, Bella. How do you manage your coolness?"

"I hang around hot girls."

Immediate regret for unmonitored words ensues.

_Oh my God, I actually just said that_._ Mental face palm, mental face palm!_ The easily-heard comment earned a smirk from Alice, as nimble fingers pulled cabbage out of my bangs.

"Is that a general statement, or are you referring to someone in particular?"

My mind was screaming profanities at itself. Stupid self, that couldn't catch a break if humanity depended on it.

"Uhh- would you believe me if I told you I meant to say hot _boys_?"

Alice laughed, probably because I was getting flustered and probably because my 'save' was pretty much confirmation of my idiocy. "Hot _dogs_, maybe. Hot boys? No."

"But Jacob has a six-pack." I said.

"What's your point?"

"Uhh-" Right. There was absolutely no point to that.

Hey everybody, my name's Bella and I'm a moron!

I think that was a pretty accurate slogan.

...

If anybody out there needs proof of a God, it would be the fact that I was lying in bed with Alice Cullen. Why Jacob's spare room had a double bed, I will never know - but I was eternally grateful for it. Jacob and Edward were bunking together, as were Alice and I. Can we take a moment to think about how gay that must seem? Or maybe Jacob planned the sleeping arrangements this way, for my benefit. Alas! As long as I was sharing a blanket with Alice, I didn't care for an explanation. Things were working out pretty conveniently.

Well, except for the fact that Alice kept kicking me in her sleep. I'm not talking about the groggy little sway of the legs, I'm talking about knee-jerking, bruise-causing kicks. Hence the reason I was awake at 3am. 3:02am, to be exact.

I evaded a swat from my feisty bed mate, only to receive a knee to the groin. I was so happy I didn't have balls.

As much as I hated to do it, I placed a pillow between Alice and I, creating a wall of fluffy goodness. Then I shifted around, trying to get comfortable without anything to rest my head on.

A sleepy groan came from the other side of the bed. I propped myself up to see if she was awake.

"Stop moving," She mumbled. "I can't sleep."

I chuckled quietly. She was blaming _me_ for waking her up? She should try two hours of being beaten by a should-be lover.

I watched her silently, absolutely registering the creepiness of watching her sleep, but not caring at all. The moonlight filtered in through the window, giving her skin a milky glow; and even through my fatigue, I could appreciate her beauty. I wondered, how in the world - even if she wasn't mine, did I get lucky enough to have her in my life? Through strange, unlikely events, this incredible girl was now running through my life, not to mention my mind, at full speed. I knew I was digging myself in a hole, and I swear I would dig myself to China at this rate - but I was falling so hard for this girl and it felt like nothing was going to stop me. What had originally been a royal pain in the ass, was turning into something I had yet to understand. Nothing could come close to this feeling, to this moment; a moment that was going to be etched into my brain like hands in wet cement.

Tossing away caution, and probably my good sense, I let impulses lead my hand towards her face. I was going for a stray hair that had fallen over her forehead; but as I hovered over her skin, I decided to let it be. Somehow, the minuscule piece of disarray seemed befitting to the picture. I liked her just the way she was.

Seeing her eyes start to flutter, I quickly retrieved my hand and placed it in a less creepy position by my neck. Alice opened her eyes slowly, and blinked a few times.

"Hi," I said quietly. I felt a bit sheepish; even though I hadn't been caught touching her, I had definitely been caught watching her.

She smiled, sleepily. "Hi."

"Dream well?" I whispered.

"I think so." She whispered back. "Something about soccer."

That would probably explain the kicking.

"Perhaps boxing too?" I asked, chuckling to myself in the darkness.

"Hmm?"

"Nothing." I smiled, and even though she had no idea what I was talking about, she smiled too. In that moment, I was certain that I'd never get over this. I was sure that log cabins, whispered words, and the 3am moonlight would never be the same for me. Or maybe I was just over thinking it. "Hey, can I ask you something?" I said softly, pushing the pillow down slightly so that I could see her face better.

Alice nodded, and I could see her starting to drift off again. I wanted to ask her this before she fell asleep. I just needed to.

It was something between a whisper and just a movement of my lips, but I think she heard it. "Do you remember me?" I asked quietly.

By now her eyes were closed, but she was still with me, because she answered. "Mmhmm, sure."

I was positive she wasn't thinking on the same page as I was, but I continued anyways.

"Because I remember you."

There was a long pause, and the silence stretched right into my realization that she was sleeping. Her chest moved up and down evenly, and her hand lay outstretch on the pillow between us. I reached out slowly, as not to wake her, and carefully touched her palm with my pinky. I was perfectly content with drawing meaningless shapes into her skin, but I still had a few things to say to her. Maybe I felt more open, knowing that she was no longer listening.

"Did you know that you made New York stop moving? Even the birds were still." My voice was a feathery whisper, as if I was talking to myself. "They must've thought you were lovely, too."

The corner of Alice's lip moved, ever so slightly. I froze for a few seconds, and then relaxed when she didn't wake.

"Did you know that you changed me?" I said, and that time I was certain that I had spoken too low for anybody but myself to hear.

Her voice broke through the silence, like a hand dipping into still water. "Bella?" She asked, seeming to break through her fatigue momentarily.

"Yeah?"

Alice pulled the blankets up closer to chin. "What are you talking about?"

I might've laughed to myself, but instead I settled on a toothless smile.

"Nothing."

* * *

**Well? Thoughts please, it was really hard for me to write that last scene! **

**I still don't feel like I got the mood down correctly. I'm not too good with words haha.  
**


	12. Off the Map

**Alright, I got a bit of heat for my last comment. Let me clarify that I am a never-ending abyss of randomness, and can do _that_ part well. Sappy moments in sappy stories? That's where I'm essentially useless. Talentless celebrities give me hope!**

**I hope you really like Jacob in this story; because I do. He plays a part later. :)  
**

* * *

According to the quantum theory of E=MC2; the faster you are moving in comparison to the speed of light, the slower 'time' passes for said moving object in relation to a stationary observer. In simple English, if one were to move at the speed of light, they could essentially move backwards in time. At the exact rate of 299,792,458 meters per second; it would seem that time were not passing at all - in theory, creating a standstill.

At the speed Alice's car was whizzing down the road? I swore we would end up in the 1980's.

"God, Alice - slow down! I'm in no hurry to get back to my 9 to 5 job, but I do want to _get_ there." I said, clutching at my seat belt.

Alice laughed, and cranked up the radio. "Relax, it's the country side - there's nothing to crash into. Here, look at these pictures."

I nearly rolled my eyes. How could someone possibly multitask like she did, when driving at a breakneck speed? Here I was, trying not to get swept away to Alaska; while Alice did everything she possibly could that _didn't_ involve driving. Telling me stories about her parents?- Yeah, she's a 'hands talker' and reenacted the entire tale. Shuffling through her iPod to find a better song?- Let me tell you that she has over 1000 songs on that thing, not to mention that every other one was her 'absolute favourite'. Reaching into the backseat; deciding between pairs of sunglasses; or just plain looking at me while she talked were among many things that I was certain would eventually get us killed.

"If you keep your eyes on the road."

"Fine."

She handed me a small envelop of old pictures from the pocket of her door. I flipped through them, finding myself grinning at each image. There were only a handful of pictures, and they were of Alice and Edward as kids, presumably growing up in Boston. The tiny Alice was accompanied by a tiny Edward, and I couldn't help but laugh at their matching mushroom cuts. Not only that, but there seemed to be a cat in every picture that contained Edward.

"Sexy." I said, and the both us understood that the childhood pictures were anything but sexy.

"Everybody goes through the mushroom cut phase." She said, laughing.

"I didn't," I said. "I was more of baseball cap every-day-until-grade-6 type of kid. I thought I was tough shit."

Alice snorted. "And you tell me you're not gay."

We were on our way back to New York at this point in the day, having left the reservation after lunch. What was supposed to be a four hour drive back, would probably be turned into two hours with Alice behind the wheel. I almost dreaded being back in my flat. Jacob's cabin and his presence alone had engulfed me into their protective bubble; filtering in what was good, and leaving out the bad. Now I was on my own, out in the real world. I didn't care if they started calling me Bubble Girl - I wanted back in, and I wanted back in forever. In the meantime, Jacob and I's last conversation still replayed in my head; I couldn't help but wonder if he was right.

_"Hey, I found your shirt in the bathroom." Jacob said, poking his head into my room slowly. I didn't have a lot to pack, but I was taking my sweet time and then some."Figured you wouldn't want to leave it."  
_

_"Thanks, Jake."_

_Instead of tossing me the shirt, like I expected; he waited around, looking like he wanted to say something.  
_

_"Hey, Bella?"_

_"Yeah?" I asked.  
_

_"Don't forget to take your smile."_

_I laughed at him. What a dork. "I don't think it's something I can leave behind."_

_He walked into the room, and closed the door behind him. "Just promise me you'll use it, though." He said, offering me a crooked grin. _

_I sighed. I was sure to smile back in New York; I guess I just wasn't sure how often. "Well, I'll give you a progress update sometime." I said. _

_Jacob stood in my room, as if he were expecting something. What did he want me to say? That I'd be sunshine on legs when I walked into my flat? Let's be realistic - this place was more of a home than a lifetime in the flat could ever be. _

_"You know," He started, tracing his fingers along the wardrobe carefully. "She likes you."_

_Who, Alice? Yeah, thick chance on that one. As friends, maybe - as anything more; I seriously doubted it. I had learned a while ago not to get my hopes up - not when it was such a long fall down__. Jacob should know that, right? "I don't think so, Jake." I said, heaving my luggage onto the bed.  
_

_He laughed quietly. "What makes you so sure?"_

_I stopped stuffing socks into the luggage, and looked at him. Wasn't it obvious? There weren't any lines for Jacob to read between this time. _

_"She just doesn't."_

_"Not when you have that attitude." He chuckled. Well, I was glad _somebody _was finding this funny. "You think she'll never go for you, eh?"_

_What was with him? Didn't he know I was already struggling enough - I didn't need more package while trudging up this mountain. _

_"Her and I aren't exactly on the same page, Jacob. She has a perfect life and a perfect boyfriend back home; I have a job that I landed by complete fluke, and a pretty much mediocre everything else. She doesn't have anything more to 'go for'."_

_"You should ask her." He said, turning to face me. He threw the shirt he was holding to me, which I caught in mid air, and crossed his arms. "Funny you still call them flukes. . ."_

_...  
_

I scrunched up my nose. Starbucks or not, coffee generally tasted like shit. Being from New York it was practically in my job description to drink coffee though, and I hadn't been left out of _that _statistic. A litre of milk and five million sugar cubes later, and the liquid poison became somewhat drinkable.

"What'd you get?" I asked Alice, as she sat down across from me.

"Cafe Americano. Black." She answered.

What a brave, brave soul. Who drinks their coffee black these days?

"That's a no bullshit drink." I said.

Alice laughed, cupping her drink between her palms. She looked extra cozy, as if she were sitting beside a fireplace and were bundled up in a blanket. The image made me smile inwardly; did everything about her have to be so cute? "I only got into coffee when I started college. I figured I'd take the macho route."

"And this route led you to life you have now?" I asked.

"Precisely."

"Who knew? The secret to riches, success, and love is at the bottom of black coffee."

Alice winked at me. "Don't tell anyone."

That feeling of an entire butterfly kingdom being set loose in your stomach? That's exactly what her wink triggered.

God, I wondered if she realizes that I'm not usually like this. Lord knows, I'm not the type of person who calls misplaced adrenaline and endorphins, 'butterflies'; I'm also not the type to take a week off a new job for an impromptu trip in the woods. I don't dive into algae water, eat salad for dinner, ride motorbikes, or speed down dirt roads. I don't like girls, and I definitely don't love them. This wasn't me; this was me on hard drugs, me going through a mid-life crisis, me not being me. It was ridiculous! I was being stupid, juvenile, pathetic, nonsensical, retar- _whoa, why's she sucking on her bottom lip? That's actually pretty cute. I like that. What does it mean? Did I do something? Did-_

Ugh! Back to my inner monologue.

In reality, it takes me a long time to be comfortable with people. A really long time. Save Jasper, I usually have to spend an unhealthy chunk of time with someone to consider them my friend, let alone like them. Let alone love them. That's just it - I was going mental. It seemed like the only logical explanation. What normal person talks to themself as much as I do? Perhaps my inner narrator was just overactive, the monologues and all that are just 'it' being obnoxious.

Maybe I've developed OCD. Why else would I be acting like this? There must be a simple chemical explanation for the imbalance in my brain. I fall a lot - hello, _something_ must've gone wrong. -Else I wouldn't notice all the little things like I do. Examples off the top of my head? How about the way she bites her lip when she's finished a long sentence, and is awaiting a response; the way she blinks slower in the morning than in the afternoon; or the way she prefers celery over carrots on Fridays, and only on Fridays. Now I had to add this cute lip-sucking thing to my list, right after I find out what it's for.

Like I said - mental.

I wonder if she knows the effect she has on people. Does she notice how things get brighter around her?- How she walks into the room and the paint on the walls seem to turn a few shades lighter? Did she know that every time she walks past a group of people, every single one of them does a double take; wondering who she is and how she loves? Surely, I couldn't be the only one.

Nicholas Sparks needed to get into my brain and make a home there - it'd seriously give him a few ideas.

...

We were driving down the road again; much slower this time because there was traffic. The city and its looming buildings could be seen in the distance, and I knew we'd be home soon. This was probably the last time I'd have alone with Alice. Roughly, that translates to 'this is the last time I get to talk to Alice before she sucks face with Jasper'. _Right_, go time.

She was just finishing up a story about her and Edward, and I figured it was now or never. I wanted to relieve that nag that had been there for days.

"You never finished telling me about Julliard." I said, trying to be casual. Except I wasn't casual and that was totally the most un-smooth entrance I've ever made; considering I had totally cut her off from the end of her story. Well, I was only human.

"Uhh-"

"Sorry, I interrupted, didn't I? Please finish." I said, trying to redeem myself.

"Then Edward and I went home."

I waited a few more seconds before realizing that that was the ending of her story. _Oops._ I guess I should have waited.

"Sweet." I said. I probably should have picked a better word, since 'sweet' was pretty much interchangeable with 'cool'; thus making both words conversation cutters. You know when you don't know what to say when somebody's talking to you, and you just say 'cool'? Yeah, I hoped she didn't think I was doing that now.

God, my head wasn't on straight.

"I'm surprised that you remember the Julliard thing," Alice said, laughing. "I totally forgot about it."

"It seemed interesting, and you kind of got cut off before anything juicy happened." I said back to her. No need to tell her I'd slightly obsessed about it that night. No need at all.

Alice shrugged. "It's a long story."

"We're stuck in traffic."

"It's kind of boring."

"I don't think you're capable of boring me." I pressed on. I smiled to try to make myself less of a nuisance, but here I was being impolite again. Buttons need to be pressed to find out what's underneath, don't they? And no, that was not a sexual reference.

Alice laughed again, seeming to resign. "Alright, fine. Where did I leave off?"

"Right at the beginning."

"Oh, okay. Well, yeah - so I'd been living Boston and it was between Julliard and Harvard. I mean, I didn't want to be lame and go to the same school as my older brother but my parents really wanted me to go there." She started. "But I was absolutely in love with drawing. Like, I thought I was Picasso or some shit. Anyways, I decided to go against pretty much everyone who supported me, and ended up in Julliard."

"And presumably, that's where you met your love?" I asked. I seemed to have a knack for interrupting.

"Uhh, yeah. But Tanya comes in later." She answered.

I blinked.

Tanya?

_Is that . . ._

"A girl?" I croaked.

Alice nodded. "Well, yeah. So like I said, I went to Julliard and-"

I literally heard nothing else she said. I will never know how that sentence ended, because I was too busy reminding myself to breathe.

My mind mentally shat itself.

It also vomited a little.

Then it started yodeling.

Oh my God. Alice bats for my team. Or batted for my team. Or I bat for hers, because technically she was on that ship first. Or something.

Or. Or. Or. Or.

Wow that sounds like a seal's noise.

But that doesn't matter because Alice Cullen was, is, should be, _gay_.

I rolled down my window to make sure the world was real.

It was definitely real.

_Dear God, I know I don't pray to you often; but what the fuck are you playing at? Please and thanks. - Bella._

Mental diarrhea ensues.

_

* * *

_**Possibly a terrible place to leave off, I meant to write down Alice's whole story in this chapter. Instead, I tried to opt for a bit of humor because Bella was being too angsty for my taste. **

**It's mostly because I left the sheet of paper that mapped out Tanya and Alice's story up in my bedroom, and I am too lazy to go grab it. **

**Hehe. . . **

**Tell me if you saw that coming.**

**...**

**Oh, and by popular request, I hinted at some Edward+cats in this. Sorry guys, that's as far as I will go :P. Those who read Hot and Cold will get the inside joke. Those who don't . . . well, you're missing out. :D  
**


	13. Two Many Marriages, Not Enough Love

** I had a hard time deciding on how the story should be told. I mean, I really wanted to get it over with quickly by getting Bella to recite it in a few paragraphs . . . but I think the whole purpose of it would be dashed in that case. I mean, it's supposed to reveal a lot about Alice's personality and her way of dealing with things, as well as show how she ended up with Jasper now. Thus Alice should be the one to tell it. . . but then it drags on for the entire chapter. My bad :D. There was really no other way to do it. :(**

**Least favourite chapter, but I guess one of the most important!  
**

* * *

Jersey Shore was better paced than Alice's story. Not that I didn't like listening to her talk; it was just that she'd been talking forever about all the people she met at Julliard, and so far nothing about this Tanya chick. Was I wrong to be anxious about that? I had a burning curiosity to know what type of girls Alice was into. Maybe I should have been listening to this preliminary part; I mean, some of the people might come in later on - but zoning out in order to shit bricks and have mini-mental breakdowns seemed more rewarding to me.

Basking in the glory of this new found gayness was just _so_ sweet. How can I sum it up adequately . . .

It was nectar from Aphrodite's sweet plums; the electrostatic energy in the Great Hammer of Thor; the badass biceps of Hercules. It was like everyone in the world put in a collective effort to jump at the exact same time - making the world on my shoulders infinitely lighter. This was my life right now and it was so freakin' sweet that I could make honey, dribble it over dirt, and call it gourmet pudding.

That kind of describes it.

"So then I get transferred into the Visual Arts sub-program; I mean, I was there for music already but the VA was what I _really_ wanted. Since Julliard is primarily Dance, Drama, and Music; the VA classes were small. Tanya was in every single one," She continued.

_Finally. Mystery girl is introduced 392803 minutes later.  
_

"Like, I noticed her right away. It was crazy, I had a grade school crush on this chick and I'd never even talked to her."

_Seems familiar._

"So we meet, and like she's awesome. Total cool points for her. We hit it off well and everything goes good for a few weeks. Better than good-"

"Let me guess, awesome?"

Alice laughed. "Yeah, awesome. I don't think any other word describes it. And then one day, _poof_."

"Poof?"

"Yeah, poof; she's gone. She avoids me like I'm walking cancer." Alice said. If we weren't backed up behind cars, I would've sworn that we'd drive off the road - she was getting so into the story. I started to realize that what began as something she seemed reluctant to reveal, was really only avoided because of the ridiculous length of the story. Alice was now explaining her angsty times and her quizzical mindset during Tanya's strange behavior; something she felt the need to describe in minuscule detail. She seemed very casual about this - as if having a gay ex-lover was completely normal and universally accepted. In a way I admired her for that - it obviously takes a lot of self-confidence and understanding to be able to accept your wayward sexuality. "So finally I corner her, to ask her what's up. It took a bit of squeezing, kind of like a lemon; but I finally get her to come clean. Turns out she started liking me and she _couldn't_ start liking me, so she tried to stay away."

Oh, how appropriate._ Been there, done that. _Seems like a natural defense mechanism when you like someone you shouldn't - you try to take yourself out of the picture. Very typical._  
_

"So I tell her that I liked her, and then from there it was like ksajirweibcwerxdfjieirfd."

Really, 'ksajirweibcwerxdfjieirfd'? I couldn't help but chuckle - it didn't matter that she was talking about some other girl, the way she was telling the story was utterly adorable. She really did sound like a teenager. "I would like to experience that gibberish." I said with a cheesy grin. "It sounds wholesome."

"Believe me, I'd love to experience it again too." She said, laughing. "So it was good for a while; we dated, sort of. Her parents were major dickheads, so we had to keep it on the down low. We were both 'upper class', so to speak; and her parents were all about image, reputation, and all that cliche elitism bullshit. She'd already shit on their faces by coming to Julliard."

"What was she there for?" I asked.

"Dance. She was a great dancer, it was like she was a worm - she totally bent in ways that shouldn't be possible. Well, _I _appreciated her flexibility."

_. . . That was totally__ a sexual innuendo. Gross!_ Oh man, I could barely touch my own toes; maybe I should start stretching . . .

"We both loved drawing though; we'd spend hours in Central Park just sketching."

"She sounds like a perfect match for you." I said, very aware of the growing jealousy inside of me. I tried hard to push the envy down - I mean, from what it looks like, Tanloser - er, Tanya, wasn't even in Alice's life anymore. She must've fucked up somewhere along the way. I entertained that thought in order to keep my face from scowling.

Alice nodded thoughtfully. "I thought she was."

_There's hope!_

"If there was one thing that really tore us apart, it was the fact that was very insecure about our relationship and her sexuality. I mean, we were both young and still dependent on our parents. She was always scared they would find out, always scared we'd 'get caught'. That really limited us in a sense - we always had to meet up secretly and whatnot." She said.

"But surely that would get better with time, right?"

Alice laughed, perhaps a little more bitterly than I'd known her for. "That's the thing - we didn't have time. Tanya's parents owned an oil company, and apparently politics are a huge part of their work. Since she was kid, she'd been expected to marry this other dude that was a family friend."

"No way, people still do that these days? Like, arranged marriages and shit?"

Alice shook her head. "Well, it wasn't an arranged marriage - she wasn't being forced into it, but she had been brought up with the idea drilled into her head. Her parents were passively pressuring her into having a relationship with this guy - James, was his name; because of his parents' connections and status in the business world. James's parents owned another oil company, and since the industry itself is an oligopoly, Tanya's parents figured that they could completely control the market by having a partnership with James's parents. Plus, something something about continuing a legacy and how everything about him was 'perfect' husband material. Or so they said."

Why did this remind me of Gossip Girl? The elitism, the high-class expectations, the my-parents-are-millionaires-and-I-will-be-one-too; it was another world to me. I'd been raised in a simple house with my father, Charlie. The biggest drama in my life had been when Cooper had stolen his dad's car, and we were pulled over by Charlie himself. This high-stakes marriage shit was beyond me.

"So Tanya was dating James while we were 'going out' - for some juvenile reason, I was okay with it. A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, right? I guess I was okay with it because I knew that Tanya didn't love him. Who would? He was an asshole; your rich, frat boy cliche, if you will. Cocky, controlling, and he had a ponytail for Christ's sake." She continued.

I did my best not to mention that Jasper's hair was long enough to be put into a ponytail, too. I had a feeling she wouldn't appreciate that.

"By then I was head over heels in love with this girl; we both were crazy about each other. I'd do anything for her, literally anything - I never wanted anything as bad as I wanted Tanya . . . But our time was running out; she was set to be married to James that summer. Hours felt like minutes, minutes felt like seconds, and things were just going too fast because the school year was over and July was approaching like a train in my direction."

I didn't speak because I was genuinely interested in her story. You'd think a girl like Alice would have good things laid out for her - turns out that wasn't the case. I guess my earlier judgments of her were wrong. It seems we all have our own trials to face, and our hearts have their own plans for us.

"So, being young and all; I asked her to run away with me. When she said no, I was pretty much shit on legs. She said that she loved me, but she couldn't be with me like she wanted; that she _had _to marry James and it was too late to change anything. That was bullshit - you never _have_ to do anything; you always have a choice, you always get to choose."

"So she chose James." I said, and it was a statement rather than a question.

Alice nodded. "Yes, she chose James. I was too angry at her for not choosing me, too prideful to be mature about it. I didn't go to her wedding to spite her, and I ignored her long after."

"And that was the last time you saw her?" I asked.

"Not quite." She said, her grip seeming to tighten on the steering wheel. "That's the thing, isn't it? No matter how much it hurts, no matter how stupid something seems, you end up crawling back to the person you love. I kicked myself over and over again for not going to the wedding, for not trying harder to get her back. I should have stopped her from marrying James; not even for my sake, but for hers - I knew she'd never be happy with him. I wrote her a letter before school started again, pretty much bleeding my heart out onto the paper. I didn't know her new number, or her new address, so I sent it to her old one. Biggest mistake of my life."

"What happened?"

"I don't know why the hell I put 'Mrs. Denali' on that letter, instead of just 'Tanya'. Tanya's last name had obviously changed - something I didn't think about, and her mother thought the letter was for her . . ."

"Oh shit." I said, knowing exactly where this was leading.

Alice chuckled humorlessly. "Yeah, _oh shit_. All hell broke loose, Tanya's parents were yelling at James's parents; James was yelling at Tanya; and Tanya was denying anything to do with me. By the end of the shit fest, I had been reduced to 'a girl who was obsessed with Tanya', that was so crazy that 'she believed herself to be in a relationship with her'."

"No," I said, feeling a pang of sympathy for her. "Tanya sold you out like that?"

"I'm not even finished," Alice said, grimacing. "Even if there was the slightest possibility for me to continue seeing her after her marriage, that hope was dashed. Both sets of parents were irreversibly freaked out by me, and had a restraining order installed."

"Oh my God," I breathed. It seemed like her misfortunes never ended. And I thought _I_ had it bad.

"So that was that. I dropped out of Julliard two days into my second year, did a course in Media Arts at Emerson back at Boston, and eventually took over the studio."

"You never saw her again?' I asked, and my voice was scratchy even though I had hardly talked in the last half an hour.

Alice shook her head, smiling. "Just once. It was a convention - aka, elitism-central, and she was across the room, sitting with James. She looked different; still lovely, but lifeless. Entirely a different person than when I knew her - she used to shine, she could stop traffic because everybody would stop to turn their heads. I saw her, she saw me, and I swear the look that she gave me broke my heart worse than the first time. _That_ was the last time I saw her."

"You should have talked to her!" I piped up. Even though this wasn't my love story, and I should've been very jealous of their relationship, I found myself rooting for them. I had no idea why I wanted a happy ending for this story.

Alice laughed. "I would have. But then I got asked to leave the area because I was violating the restraining order."

"Oh," I said, quietly.

"I know, it was terrible." She said. "After that, I literally thought that the world was ending; if it went on for a week longer you'd probably find me in a basement with a shotgun, preparing for the apocalypse."

"So, it ended then?"

Alice shrugged. "I guess you could call it that. My parents were really worried about me, and they suggested I go out and find myself a nice boy to love and have five million babies with. It's not that they were really against my pansexuality, it's just that they had developed an extreme distaste for it and thought it best I date a boy. In simple terms, they thought it'd be easier for me to slip into the comfort of conformity."

"Use heterosexuality as a security blanket," I added.

"Exactly," Alice agreed. "So I chilled around Boston for a while, and ended up going back to live in New York. I met Jasper after one of his gigs at a bar I was at, and we became friends almost immediately. He helped me deal with things, and was good company."

"Then you ended up dating him." I said.

"Uhh, no; not exactly." She said.

My eyebrows flew up - from the way they act now, I always thought it was an instant chemistry thing for them. They looked like they were the type that were romantically interested in each other from the beginning.

"Jasper was a great friend and I loved him like a brother. We'd been friends for almost a year when he admitted that he wanted to be more, and that he thought he loved me."

"No way; and you didn't like him back?"

Alice chuckled. "Not really - I mean, I didn't really think about him that way until he brought it up. We stayed friends for a while, but Jasper was determined to 'win my love', so he'd always do sweet things - like what he did on Valentine's day; he'd go all out for simple things and I guess I really appreciated that. With Tanya, things had always been so hidden, so limited - she had never been able to do those types of things for me, and I to her. Eventually, with Jasper being quite the hopeless romantic, I decided to give us a shot."

"And now you're here?" I asked.

Alice shrugged. "Now I'm here."

I creased my forehead. This was a lot to think about in such little time. It didn't seem right to me that things had ended that way for Alice; that she was now with Jasper, when she had only 'loved him like a brother' in the beginning. Was I over thinking it again? I usually do that, but my thoughts seemed valid this time.

"Do you even love him?" I asked her.

Alice laughed, running a hand through her hair. "Of course I do, Bella. I wouldn't have dated him for a year and a half if I only found it convenient."

Alright, so she _does_ love him. But why did I still feel like it was wrong? That she was loving the wrong person? My head was muddled with thoughts that didn't seem coherent. I tried to map it out in my mind.

So Alice was gay, or was, or had gay tendencies. (Or Or Or *slapping hands together*)

She fell in love with a girl who was dating a guy, and eventually insecurity won her lover over.

Then she met Jasper, and they started dating after a long courting period. To me, it seemed like she mind-jedied herself into loving him - but what did I know?

And now her real love was married to a douchebag, and she was going to be married to Jasper - the sloppy seconds.

Reciting all this made me start to realize why I wanted Alice and Tanya's story to end well. In a sense, I was in the same situation. The same pickle.

I loved Alice, and Alice was going to be married to Jasper. - Okay, not the same predicament; but there were some similarities.

Suddenly I found myself not wanting to be the Alice of the story. I didn't want _my_ love story to end disastrous like hers; I wanted to be brave enough to make the right choices if and when the time came. If I had been so close to having something the way she did, I wouldn't let it slip through my fingers. At least I didn't think I would. I owed it to myself to be better than that.

"Do you think about Tanya often?" I asked her, not really sure where the lines were in this conversation. She had told me the story quite casually, but I could tell that there was an underlying sensitivity to the subject,

Alice seemed to mull over this question for a while before answering. "I used to. She never really goes away, you know? Trying to forget someone you loved is like trying to remember someone you never met."

Whoa, deep.

"I've gotten over her, though." She said; and by the tone of her voice, I knew she was being honest. "I can't be with somebody who's too scared to love me back. I've forgiven her for what she did, because I know we were young and her choices were heavily influenced."

"But she did have a choice." I said, watching Alice carefully.

Alice tapped her fingers on the steering wheel. The traffic was clearing up, and we were finally moving at a speed that was respectable for a Porsche. She smiled, and I couldn't help but notice that underneath those perfect lips, there was something melancholy. "Yes, Bella. She did have a choice."

* * *

**I had a very, very hard time writing this. It may seem disjointed because I wrote it in many sittings; I kept leaving to do other things because I found it so boring to write. **

**Alas, I've vomited out these words and tried to form sentences because it was needed for the plot. **

**What I hoped to achieve was giving Alice some layers to her character. Establish that she's not just a pretty face, and that development had occurred before rather than during this story. The manner in which she presents the Julliard story, and her reaction to it now, hopefully gave enough information to show what type of personality she has. **

**I also really wanted to bring in some common issues about homosexuality; I've been in 'closeted' relationships, and they really do suck. As well, the whole idea of dating someone to solidfy your 'heterosexuality' and give yourself a sense of security is very much a prominent problem in today's gay society. At least where I live. Thanks for reading, the rest of the fic should come rather easily to me; and I'm actually excited to write it.  
**

**Now . . . who would kill me if this story didn't end happily? :P**

**(Another, random note: I didn't intend to have a sequel to this story; but writing this chapter had put ideas into my head. I'll take a survey when I finish this fic, to see who's interested)  
**


	14. Nifty Cellphones

**Just kidding, I hate sad endings. I didn't write 30,000 words to just end up with an angsty Bella, did I?**

**Well, I _do_ have two endings in my mind. The sad one is actually looking kinda attractive, in a 'how _you_ doing?' type of way. **

**I guess you'll find out which one I end up picking :D**

* * *

The first thing I did when I entered the flat, was slam my face into my pillow and fall asleep. There were much too many thoughts in my head, and so my brain chose to shut down in the form of temporary death. Oh, sweet, sweet sleep; how you are so good to me. If sleep were a human, I'd cuddle with it and make it waffles in the morning; I'd moisturize it with lotion so it wouldn't get dry and ashy. That's how much I loved it. I could feel myself drifting off into a very pleasant-

"BELLA YOU'RE BACK!"

My eyes shot open.

Cooper bounced on my bed, grinning like a kid on Christmas day. "How was it? How's Jacob? Did you get in touch with your nature spirit? Did you hug trees all week? What'd you do? One of your eyelids is bigger than the other. You're also drooling."

"Hi Cooper." I said, removing my face from the pillow. I wiped my mouth because, in fact, I had been drooling; and faced my old friend. "You look . . . happy."

"That's because I am happy; exquisitely so! But first, tell me about your week." He said.

I surveyed him with a hint of concern. Why was he glowing like that? Something must've made him_ real_ happy. "It was good." I said, rubbing my eyes. I had no idea why I was so tired, but hell - it was Sunday and it was my American right to be lazy to my heart's content today. "Alice is gay. Or something."

"Oh, I knew that." He said.

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Are you serious? Since when?" I asked.

He shrugged happily. "The other day; Jasper got really drunk and told me all his feelings."

I laughed. How typical - when Jasper was drunk, he only had two personalities. One of which was an emotional wreck; that one was personally my favourite, only because it provided me with so much blackmail material. How else would I know that he dreams of horses nearly every night? Yes, a drunk Jasper was _very _amusing.

"So, you ran into Alice; eh?" He asked.

I nodded. "Yeah, it was kind of random."

"And?"

"And what?"

"What happened?" He pressed on.

I shrugged. "Nothing. We just . . . chilled."

"Right, and you guys chastely made love."

I furrowed my eyebrows. Was Cooper acting weird, or was it just me? "What are you talking about?"

"Fine. Jacob called me while I was on my way home, and told me to tell you to 'remember what he said'." Cooper recited, in an ominous tone that in no way resembled Jacob's actual voice. "Now, I have no idea what that means, but I figured that it translates to 'you had an awesome week of lesbian celibacy, and now you and Alice love each other'." He stated.

A muffled curse left his mouth as my pillow flew into his face.

"Hey, Jacob's not the only one who can read between lines!" He said, defending himself from my pillow-onslaught.

"Yeah, and you're reading them _wrong_!" I said.

Cooper grabbed my blanket, wrapping me up into a cocoon until I couldn't move.

"Stop it!" I laughed.

"Not until you hatch." He said, grinning. I got one arm free of its prison, and flopped it around in my attempt to get out. "Man, you'd make one awkward butterfly." He said.

"And you have too much hair." I responded, as I stuck my free hand into his curls and ruffled them wildly.

He jumped off the bed, cradling his precious mop of hair. "Hey, this hair is the definition of testosterone; thou shalt not mess with it." He said, flattening his curls back into place.

"It's the definition of a bird's nest." I said, predicting the punch before it landed on my arm. "Ouch!"

"Suck it up princess," He teased. Then he took great care to re-wrap me into another cocoon before heading out my door. "I'm glad to hear you had a good time. Now come to kitchen so I can show everyone the finished copy."

"Finished copy of what?"

He wriggled his eyebrows. "Bella and the Zombies, of course."

...

Jasper and Cooper were already huddled at the kitchen table, pouring over Cooper's pride and glory of the past few months. When I entered the room, Jasper and I greeted each other and he asked the appropriate questions, inquiring about my trip. Being as vague as possible, I assured him that it was a good vacation, and that I'd probably end up at Jacob's again in the near future. He didn't press the subject, seeing as he was oblivious to my romantic interest in his girlfriend, and we marveled at the comic in front of us.

I'll admit, it was pretty damn good. As much as I hated to see my cartoon self in a ridiculous plaid costume, the comic in hard copy was much more impressive than it was on the storyboard. By now, I was convinced that Jasper was stupid. How on earth did he not see the resemblance between Naztkin Girl and Alice? How could he not make the connection between Napkin girl, me, and his current girlfriend? It didn't make sense because Jasper is clever - real clever; and here he was being studiously oblivious to the world. God, even Cooper would be able to figure it out.

The Cowboy was just plain slow. That's not a great quality when involved in a good ol' Western duel, now is it?

"What is that I'm holding?" I said, indicating the weird-looking weapon of mass destruction in my cartoon hands. We were flipping through the pages, and it had caught my eye.

"That's a banana, Bella."

"No, the other thing."

"Oh, that's your handy dandy bazooka." Cooper responded.

"_No_, that metal thing in my left hand." I said.

"Right, that's your translator. How are you supposed to win Naztkin Girl's love if you don't speak her language? It comes in handy near the end."

"Oh," I said. "I forgot she was German."

"No, she's GermaNaztkin." Said Cooper, smiling.

I rolled my eyes. These lame 'play' on real words were spread in this comic like butter.

I was going to say something else, but Alice walked into the kitchen. Her hair was still wet from the shower, and Jasper immediately swept her into his arms.

"What's crack-a-lack'in, guys?" She asked.

Again with the dorkiness! How did Jasper not explode from her cuteness? In a non-creepy way, I wanted to bottle her up and keep her nearby at all times. Right, that would be creepy no matter how I described it.

Jasper grinned at her, and gave her a quick peck on the lips. "Cooper's comic is done and ready for sale."

Alice moved to the table, looking at the comic in question. "Oh, this is the one about Bella being gay, right?" She asked.

"Right, that chick from the hot dog stand." Jasper said.

I think I might've swallowed my own tongue. Alice gave me a smirk that told me she knew all along about my girl crush on 'Napkin girl', and I could feel the blood rush to my face. So that's why she kept insisting I was gay! I should've known; of course her and Jasper talk - why wouldn't he mention it, if he had no idea it was her, anyways? The world can shoot me right about now. What a trouble maker! Pretending she didn't know . . .

Jasper squeezed his way in besides Alice, causing her to move over closer to me. Her arm was brushing against mine, and I wasn't sure if I should pull away or bask in the pleasant warmth. Right, what type of girl in love would I be if I didn't almost-jizz at the slight touch of her? Basking, basking, basking. . .

"So, does Bella end up with this Naztkin Girl? It's based on real life, isn't it?" Alice asked Cooper.

For a second, he looked alarmed - switching his gaze between Alice and I rapidly, not sure how he should respond. I inwardly cursed his stupidity and shot knives at him in hopes he could be a little less damn obvious. If there was anything good in the world, it was certainly not coming to this table; because he sheepishly replied. "I'm not sure yet, I've only written the next few editions. Uhh- what do you think?"

My imagination grabbed him by his stupid hair, and rammed his stupid face into his stupid comic.

Alice smiled, thoughtfully. "I don't know. It would be nice to see her try." She said.

Cooper nodded, seeming to like this answer. "Yeah, maybe she should."

You'd have to be blind to miss the fact that his comment was pointed at me. More reason to kill him.

Jasper grinned, more oblivious than ever, and slapped me on the back. "Who knows, Bella," He said happily. "Maybe you'll find your Napkin girl after all."

The most I could do was fix a smile onto my face and act like I was casual. I was not casual. Not in the slightest bit. How much more embarrassing could people make this?

After another minute or so of musing, Jasper announced that him and Alice would be going out to dinner that evening. They congratulated Cooper once again, and headed to their rooms to get ready. Five minutes later, once they were safely out the door, I turned on Cooper in a near-murderous mindset.

"Want to bake a cake? I bought some flour; grocery shopping is actually kind of fun." Cooper said, not seeming to notice the steam blowing out from my ears.

"No." I said, in an even voice.

"Why not? I've taken up baking since you've been gone; it's a wholesome hobby."

I closed my eyes for a bit longer than a standard blink. Maybe this was a dream, maybe Cooper wasn't actually this stupid. Maybe this entire situation was an evil figment of my imagination.

I opened my eyes, and Cooper sat in front of me, doe-eyed and looking much like he did two seconds ago.

"I don't want to bake, I want to kill you." I said.

He raised his eyebrows. "Why?

"Because I now wear a flashing red sign above my head, saying 'I'm gay and I am in uber-love with Alice Cullen'."

"I'll say, the look sort of suits you."

"I was_ this _close to melting into the floor because of you, Coop! You're the worst wingman ever."

"Okay, I stumbled a bit at her question. Men make mistakes multiple times a day." He defended.

"I can't believe this, you and your stupid comic are going to be the end of me!"

"That's a little melodramatic." He breathed.

"My life is entirely melodramatic. I can't catch a break, not for fifteen friggen' minutes."

"You just had a week's break, Bella. And from the not-so-anemic glow in your face, it looks like you enjoyed it."

My hands made their way to my face, and I pressed down on the sensitive skin around my eyes. "I _know_." I droned. "I enjoyed it way too much, and that's the problem. Now I'm back in the real world."

"Who's to say they're not one in the same?" Cooper asked.

I looked at him. Who was he, Jacob? Where were these not-so-stupid words coming from? "Don't be ridiculous. Alice will never want me while Jasper's around."

Cooper nodded slowly, seeming to mull this over. "So you really like her, eh?"

"I think I love her."

"Are you sure?" He asked.

I nodded. "I've never wanted anything more in my entire life. I can't sleep without thinking of her, I can't wake up without wondering where she is, I can't freakin' walk on my two feet without her in the back of my mind. No wonder why I'm so damn clumsy."

Cooper's face seemed to blanche for a second. "Uhh, Bella-"

"I know what you're going to say. That I'm crazy, and I've taken this 'crush' thing to a whole nother, pathetic level. But I can't help it, I've seriously fallen so hard for this girl that I think I've broken both my legs and she needs to carry me out of this stupid hole."

"Bell-"

"I love her, Coop. I can't stop loving her; she's always going be Napkin girl - she's always going to be driving away from me, while I wait at the side of the road and watch her leave. And like an idiot, I'll always be waving goodbye, even if she can't see me. I'll always be the girl that missed her. Always. Alice Cullen has freakin' manifested into some virus in my brain, spread her little cutesy self into every cell that controls me, and I might as well be a zombie because I am _so_ not myself. I would give up everything I've ever worked for, just for one second of her wanting me, and me wanting her. I just-"

"Bella, turn the fuck around." He finally blurted, getting through to me.

The rock settled in my stomach a second before I swiveled my head, laying eyes on Alice. . . ._Oh my Lord._

The world froze for an entirely different reason._  
_

"Who knew they'd write a story about us?" Alice said, smirking from the doorway.

The silence that followed seemed to last for a year and day, and I swear my birthday passed twice. Or my deathday; they seemed to be the same thing now. I took in the image of her petite body, leaning against the frame of the door. She looked terribly beautiful and I hated myself for even thinking it. And as if to emphasis just how much on opposite pages we were, she stood there completely nonchalantly, lightly chewing on a single fingernail; whilst every bone in my body was freezing, unfreezing, and then freezing once again. I was going to get freezer burn.

"Bella, I tried to tell you; but you wouldn't shut up." Cooper said, pleading his innocence.

His voice was drowned out by my heartbeat, and all I could do was look at Alice with my deer-in-headlights eyes.

"I came back to get my cellphone . . . Again." She said, and if my mind were working, it would have made the connection that the last time she walked in on Cooper and I unexpectedly, she was also getting her cellphone. How ironic, that the first time I see her, she's on her cellphone; the next time I meet her, she's getting her cellphone; and probably the last time I see her, she's again, getting her cellphone.

Stiffly, I turn my head and see the phone in question, laying on the table.

As if my mouth were mute, and all I had were actions; I dumbly pick up the cellphone, and walk over to her on rubber feet.

She takes the phone from my hands, fingers lightly grazing mine in a way I am acutely aware of, and she smiles.

"Thanks." She said softly. And there's something in her eyes that wasn't there before, and it looked a lot like fire. It looked a lot like something I knew, and something I wanted to know, and I was thinking too God damn much in too little time. Or maybe it was my eyes reflecting off of hers; but I don't get to question, because I have not yet said a word, nor was I capable of it.

She leans in only one millimeter, and not a fraction more; and assured me quietly. "You and I will talk later."

And then she was gone again, heading out the door. Once more, I was left answerless, wordless, and completely blown away by her presence. Once more, she was driving away; and all I could do was wait for her to get back. Like I said, I would _always_ be the girl watching her leave.

* * *

**Hot and Cold readers, did you catch the Cooper baking reference? :P**

**This chapter wrote itself, and I actually ended up cutting parts out because they were unneeded. **

**I forget who I sent the message to, but I was telling one of my reviewers that I was writing this in a different style. Figured I might as well tell the rest of you.**

**I'm writing this in a way that I don't leave everything clear-cut; instead, I plant things into the chapters that have meaning, and let you guys figure them out. Most of these 'things' are words or phrases that are easily read over; and maybe even seem thoughtless. In reality, anything I spend more than a sentence on usually has a symbolic meaning behind it, that foreshadows or represents events in the story. I don't know . . . I feel like I'm sharing something with the analytical lot of the group.**

**Anyways, it's 6am and I haven't slept yet; I'm running on Redbull and an orange. **

**More tomorrow, probably!  
**


	15. Tossing Rooftop Worries

**Lots of mulling over how to present this, lots of writing and then deleting, and very little productivity. *le sigh* C'est ma vie. . . C'est ma vie, malheureuse. lol. **

**By popular request, this story has been . . ._ Elongated_. So to those who figured that this story was ending soon, well - you might still be biting your nails for Bella, depending on how creative I feel. Hehe. **

**Keeping the ending the same, I've changed this part of the plot in order to accommodate an extra chapter or two. **

**

* * *

**

The days seemed longer and longer as they passed, and I seemed more and more lifeless. I was laying on Ange's couch, eating bacon flavored chips. This excessive immobility was now the definition of my life - at least for the past 6 months, that is.

Ange seemed to understand my recurrent need to vegetate at her apartment, slowly eating my feelings away; and Ben was indifferent to it. Thus I had become a regular in their house; their comfy, comfy couch was now my second home.

It was an odd sensation, really. The feeling of reducing myself to a potato-like creature, in the midst of arguably the busiest city in America. Everything in the world was moving along, and I was doing my best to stay put.

Maybe I should call Ali-

_No. You absolutely shouldn't. _

But it's been so long since-

_You know, for a brain you aren't very smart._

Fine. Jerk.

_Crazy lady._

You're talking to yourself.

_So are you._

Another mental conversation inside my head. They'd become frequent in the latter months; the little voice in my head seemed adamant on getting me to 'stop beating myself up'. Surely, it should know that this wasn't me beating myself up; this was me taking preventative measures. I was finally strapping a helmet on my head, predicting the worst, and avoiding the fall altogether. I'm smarter than my brain.

I guess a flashback would be the appropriate way to explain my current predicament. Aka, what exactly happened to land me in this shit hole.

Eight Months Ago

In the cloudy silence following Alice's leave, all I could do was stand in the kitchen; hoping for something that resembled a miracle.

"I can't believe that just happened." Cooper breathed.

I blinked, coming back to the present, and turned to him. I had completely forgotten he was there - this accidental show and tell had wiped my mind blank.

"Cooper . . . tell me this isn't real."

"It's totally real, Bella."

"Well then, humor me."

"I can't."

Right. Damn this world! Damn it in every way it can be damned!

Seriously; life was bullying me_._ Did I do something? Was karma mistaking me for another person? I in no way deserved this shit. I was a good person, God damn it! I wasn't one of those people who wore her socks with sandals, I hadn't even gotten into the whole Crocs fad as it took over America! I was blameless. Blameless, I tell you!

So why heck did Alice Cullen have be everywhere, _all_ the time? Was it really necessary? I rubbed my temples, groaning.

It felt like little Kamikaze planes were falling from the sky and consecutively bombing the center of my forehead. Fuck!

Today was a high-tech vacuum, because it really, really sucked. And yes, that was the corniest analogy ever. Oh God, now I'm laughing at my own lameness - Cooper's looking at me like I'm weird. I'm not weird. He should be more sensitive to my bizzaro behaviour . . .

"Bella, where you going?" Cooper called, as I disappeared into my room.

He followed me through the door, finding me halfway through re-packing my luggage.

"Where you going?" He repeated again, walking up to my bag and taking out the clothes I was stuffing in.

Where was I going? I was making like a ninja and getting the heck out of the flat - that's where.

He was unpacking what I was re-packing and finally, I pushed his hands away. "Stop that," I said.

Cooper furrowed his eyebrows, and watched me warily. "Bella, you're being rather impulsive, don't you think?"

I snorted in a very unladylike manner. If anyone in the world were allowed to be rash, it would be me. Hands down, I deserved to let my emotions take over for once.

"Where you going?" He said for a third time.

I sighed; I hadn't really thought that far yet. I quickly scanned my mind for the few places I _could _go - it was between a motel and my only other friends. "Ben and Ange's." I said, keeping my eyes on the task at hand. I had a new found determination, and it had turned me into a rather hasty girl. Given, my luggage was already half packed from my trip to Jacob's; but I was good to go, making very impressive time.

"Forever?" Cooper asked, eyes widening a bit. Obviously he didn't mean forever; we all know that his definition of 'eternity' is three weeks of Bella in Mope City.

"Until the cosmos align." I breathed sarcastically, heaving my luggage off the bed. "Or until Alice's room is done being renovated; so probably a week or something."

"You're not going to talk to her?" He asked, looking incredulous.

Why did he think that that was crazy? Gosh, if he'd accidentally spilled his guts to the girl of his dreams; he'd probably be running away too.

"So she can tell me that she doesn't love me back, and that she thinks I'm a creep? For Christ's sake, we slept in the same bed together - and now she probably knows half of the thoughts that ran through my head that night. She must feel like, retardedly violated or something."

"Or something." Cooper repeated, and I wanted to smack the amusement right off his face. I was so glad that my life in shambles seemed be _so_ damn funny, to everyone except me. Was it just that I wasn't in on the joke; or that I _was_ the joke?

In the pathetically short time I had entered my flat, I was now very ready to leave it. I predicted this, didn't I? This house was evil.

There Alice goes again, causing me to leave my own home for the second time in less than two weeks. That's some powerful shit she's got going there.

'Bella, I don't think you should go." Cooper said. He was following behind me everywhere I went, being borderline ball and chain.

I turned abruptly, getting ready to snap at him. He walked into me, and my face turned into a pancake on his chest. "Ow." I said, rubbing my nose.

He grinned; half-sheepish, half-apologetic. "Sorry." He said.

Wow, this was ridiculous. "You're not going to stop me." I said to him, trying to muster a very stern voice.

Cooper raised an eyebrow. "I never said I was going to." He replied.

"Oh,"

Then I was mumbling, because I guess I had expected more of a fight and his reasonable response left me feeling rather juvenile (and alright, a tad melodramatic. But hey, a girl gets to be a drama queen once in while; right?). Slightly embarassed, I figured that it was best I made haste. . . I wouldn't want Alice to show up again before I left, now did I? For obvious reasons, it seemed like a likely situation. "Okay, well I'm leaving then." I said.

Cooper hugged me in a friendly way that I would always appreciate, and smiled down at me.

"I'll call Ben, tell him to set up a bed."

...

Lodging at Ben and Ange's apartment was quite pleasant. It was good to have meat in my meals again, and they didn't press the sore subject that had brought me there in the first place. In advance, _no_; this was not what ended me up in their home eight months later. Lord knows, my complicated life wouldn't let me go _that_ easy.

It was only two days since my arrival, that Alice Cullen seemed to wriggle her way into my life again. Only this time it was no fluke, and she was there with intention.

I was walking into the building after a long day at work; being away for a week had really put a lot of to-do's on my plate. It was pretty late, and stars already littered the sky in a way that I was too busy to appreciate. I was holding a bottle of wine with the intention to give it to Ben and Ange; you know, a 'thank you' for letting me crash at their's for a week.

It was Merlot - fancy shit.

My feet tapped rather impatiently as I waited for the elevator to arrive. That's when I saw her.

She was standing outside the glass door, buzzing 'someone' in the building to let her in. I would later find out that she was, in fact, buzzing Angela; but at that moment all I could think about was exactly how slow the elevator was moving.

_Why_ was she here? Couldn't she take the hint that I didn't want to see her - considering I'd up, packed, and left on her accord? I was not panicking, figuring I'd already gone through the worst - but my emotions at that point could really only be described with a groan. The same type of groan you'd do, if you had a neighbor that constantly asked to borrow your milk.

The elevator _ding_-ed, and the door slid open as Alice was entering the building. Obviously she had seen me, and obviously she knew I'd seen her.

That didn't stop me from pressing the 'close' button with the fervor of a three year old.

The doors were rolling shut, but a small, familiar hand intercepted their closure.

Great.

The doors re-opened, revealing the one girl I couldn't seem to avoid. "Bella," She said; her face was painted with a tinge of pink from her run to the elevator. It gave her a healthy glow that I fought to ignore.

I tried to examine her expression - anything for a glimpse of what she was thinking. Well, she didn't look unsure and she definitely didn't look creeped out; but as usual, her face was unreadable. Or maybe I just sucked at deciphering that type of stuff.

"What do you want?" I asked, with a certain bitterness that she in no way deserved. "Can't you leave me alone?"

I knew I was being difficult, but seeing as she had put me through so much, pleasantries were now aside.

"To talk to you, of course." She said. She looked a little bit wary, but at the same time self-assured. Was there a power cell in her brain fueling this 24-hour confidence? I really needed to get one of those. "You owe me a conversation."

_And you owe me my life back_. I thought with a little distaste. "I don't want to talk."

It was strange, seeing her again. Half of me wanted to pluck every finger of hers that was in the way of the door, push her out of the elevator, and tell her not to come back. The other half of me . . . Well, it was still back at the cabin doing leprechaun jumps, sniffing daisies, and other ridiculous things.

"Come on Bella, you don't know what I have to say." She pressed.

_Oh, but I have a pretty good idea . . ._

By the way that she was standing - one arm on the frame of the door, on foot planted stubbornly in the elevator, and two foresty-green eyes on me; I could tell that tonight, she had a determination. Even if wasn't her nature to end up getting her way, I had the feeling that by the end of the night she would've said all she needed to say.

Well, here was my best shot. Preventative measures to ensure survival, right?

"I don't want to hear it." I said, forcing the words from my mouth. And I must've looked real pathetic, because my voice started cracking and I was closing my eyes so that I wouldn't have to look at her. I locked my jaw stubbornly, not wanting to give her the control over me that I knew she already had. "Can't you see," I said slowly, through gritted teeth. "How _hard_ this is for me?"

And then, in the blackness of my vision, I could feel a hand on mine. Really, now? That was practically cheating on her end; I almost didn't have a chance.

In essence; I wanted to tell her everything that she already knew, get my rejection over with, then curl up in the elevator and cry to the awkward background music. Do it all in one go - that was a pretty popular motto in today's world.

"You're the only one that's making this hard." She said to me, searching my face. My own eyes were avoiding hers, and instead they chose to look at our hands that were touching in such a simple manner. She seriously did strange things to my nerves - did she know that she was setting my skin on fire?

Then I shook it off, reminding myself of why I was there. I reminded myself that I was steel, and that I wasn't going to be a girl that just lets shit happen to myself anymore.

"Will you just go away?" I seethed; but as the words the left my mouth, I knew that they were just words, and that people say things all the time without really meaning them. And because I hate to be rude, I add a "Please." at the end of that sentence. Not exactly the vindictive tone I wanted - but at least I said it, right?

As if the name of the game was to be completely uncharacteristic; Alice smiled.

Why in the world was she smiling? I had just expressed my displeasure in her presence, and there she was; completely unfazed.

Damn her confidence!

"Nope," She said; and there was an assertive, yet amused tone to her voice. "I'm not leaving until we talk; and believe me, I am very prepared to be literal about that."

_Why_ was this girl so difficult to get rid of? Well, I guess I had to appreciate the certain fire she had; even if the flames were engulfing me in a slow burn.

"So bossy," I muttered quietly. Alice laughed, and I could feel the mood lighten already. "I hope you know, you'll be here for a while if you plan on keeping your word." I said.

Sure, I'd do anything for this chick - but I wasn't going down without a fight. I didn't come all this way to just fold my cards at her command.

Alice shook her head slightly, chuckling. "Why are you always so difficult?" She asked.

I nearly laughed in her face - that sentence would be more appropriate had she been facing a mirror. "You're the difficult one." I said.

Alice removed her hand from mine, and the look in her eye made me wonder what she was thinking. "Alright, fine. Let's compromise."

I didn't even know the girl knew _how_ to the compromise. Well, now I was all ears.

"What type of compromise?" I asked. I was still being careful, treading the water around this offer.

She chewed her lip thoughtfully - something I adored; and by the way her face lit up, she seemed to come up with an idea that she thought was brilliant.

"Okay, I've got it." She started. "- you take one elevator, and get off at any floor in this building. Your choice. When you get there, you just wait for me."

Oh, I _so_ knew where she was going with this. It was ridiculously cheesy, and it would never work. . . But then why did I feel my resolve breaking so easily?

"Then I'll catch the next elevator and choose a random floor as well. If we choose the same level, then you and I talk."

"And if we don't?" I asked. "This building has 16 levels, you know."

Alice wore her trademark smirk and stepped away from the elevator playfully. Out of the way of the the sensors, the doors started to roll close. "I'll meet you there." She said.

The doors closed, cutting her from my view; and I was left alone with elevator music thrumming in my ears and muddling up my thoughts.

_Whoa. _Was it just me, or did that happen really fast?

How on earth did she manage to get me to agree with this? Well, I didn't agree with it - but here I was doing it anyways.

I wasn't even sure if I wanted it to work - if I wanted to even give it a chance. A part of me had the desire to push floor 12, go into Ben and Ange's apartment, and just forget this. That was the original intention, after all.

But what if she actually _did_ pick the same floor as me? I mean, that would really be something. Really, really something.

I guess my curiosity won the battle.

Not wanting the door to re-open by taking too long, I pushed the button for floor 16. It was the level before the roof, and I don't care if it's cliche, I really liked that place.

When I reached the level, I walked out into the waiting area and . . . well, waited.

I was sitting crossed-legged, in the middle of the three elevators. Anxiety started to build up in my stomach like a thick goo, and screw good intentions - I opened that bottle of wine and drank that liquid courage. My exhausted mind was running laps to keep up with racing thoughts, and all I could hope for was toned calves by the end of it. Whenever they ended, that is.

Five minutes, ten minutes? Some number in that range of time passed, and Alice didn't show up.

I guess my life isn't so movie-like after all.

It was a stretch - wasn't it? The odds finally made sense.

Getting up from my position, I decided to make my way to the roof. I took the stairs, bottle in hand, and walked into the cool air of the night.

Alright; maybe I was a little disappointed. She had been so confident that she'd choose correctly, and seeing her being proven wrong wasn't satisfying in the slightest.

What would I even have said to her, had she come?

That's just it - I don't know.

I never knew anything around her. I'd be lucky to bubble out my own name if she asked for it.

Yes, that's an exaggeration - but the symbolism made sense to me.

The fact is, she changed me. My life was steady before I knew her; my priorities were in the right, and everything was predictable. It followed a system that was normal, consistent, and boring. I was just fine with that.

But it was like all that foundation was made out of sand - Alice came in, spewed over everything I'd built like a tidal wave, and then I was formless. My identity was questioned, my priorities were on crack, and everything became a jumble of broken, incoherent events, thoughts, and actions.

I peered over the edge of the building, looking down at the few passing cars below. Thank God for the safety rail, or I'd probably manage to throw myself off somehow.

I heard the rooftop door open, and turned to face the noise. Though I was expecting a janitor, crazy bird-lady, or annoying teen; I wasn't surprised to see Alice.

"You cheated," She said, walking up to the ledge I was standing behind. "The elevator doesn't come up here."

I looked at her contently; and there was something about the night that made her look beautiful. Her moon-kissed skin had a glow to it that was almost blue, and the light wind caused her hair to blow gently across her forehead. She belonged in a picture frame; frozen in perfection.

"Yeah, but you did." I said, chuckling.

She didn't look angry, but she certainly pouted. "Did you even pick a floor?" She asked.

"The sixteenth."

She crossed her arms. "I went there."

"No you didn't."

"I did. You weren't there."

I frowned. Had I not waited ten minutes, with her as the absentee? Or perhaps it only felt like ten minutes, and I had left all too fast. "I don't know; I waited there for a while. You really chose that floor?" I asked. And then because I couldn't help it, I muttered to myself. "What are the chances."

She'd heard my comment, and responded with a laugh. "Technically, one in sixteen. But I don't believe in chance - I pushed every button in the elevator."

I raised an eyebrow, slowly. "You did?"

Even as I said it, I could hear the slight triumph in my voice. Had she really wanted to talk to me that badly?

"Don't get cheeky," She said, catching my tone (and might I say, responding with equal cheekiness). I smiled sheepishly at her. "I wasn't going to let you get away that easy."

"Why not?" I asked. It was a serious question that I wanted a serious answer to. What did it matter to her? Why not just let me go?- Lord knows, that would make things less complicated.

Alice turned to the street, casting a glance at the scene my eyes had touched minutes before.

"Because, Bella;" She breathed, seeming to find the roads very interesting. "You're too important."

I smiled at her, very satisfied with that answer. Lifting the bottle of wine onto the ledge that she leaned against, I decided that this 'talk' wouldn't be so bad.

"How do you feel about Merlot?"

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**I know, I know . . . ending 'the talk' before it even happened. This chapter is almost double the length of the other chapters as it is, though; and I wanted to get something posted up. I at least got the part leading up to it though, and I think that that's really important. :D**

**I plan on continuing this talk in the next chapter, in some form or another. **

**The reason I wanted to post this though, is because I might not be able to post as much now.**

**I'm organizing a trip to Spain in my school, as well as an upcoming Ash Wednesday school assembly thing. I am frizzle frazzled.  
**

**Ciao, au revoir!  
**


	16. Expectations vs Reality

**So, who missed me? Oh come on, guys; show me some love :D**

**This wasn't supposed to take so long - BUT GUESS WHO STARTED DATING A REALLY HOT CHICK? Moi, merci merci! Well, she's more than just hot, but I won't drone on about that. **

**I wanted to get something up quickly, so this isn't really edited and it's really raw. Lot's more story - I predict a handful of chapters!**

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So there we were on the rooftop, sipping Merlot with our backs against the wall.

We were sitting side by side, legs sprawled out in a lazy manner. She had told me about her week so far, I told her about mine, and we hadn't even mentioned Bella and the Zombies yet. It seemed that talking about absolutely nothing was at the top of our priorities; _that_, or it was just so easy that we did it endlessly.

I was taking a super classy swig from the bottle, and I guess bravery goes hand in hand with alcohol; because I decided to give her an opening.

"So how'd you find me, anyways?" I asked her. I had left the other day like Speedy Gonzales, and she somehow knew exactly where to find me. You gotta wonder about these things.

She took the bottle from my hands. "Cooper told me you were staying here."

_That traitor._

"So you waltzed on over, eh?" I said, eying her lazily.

A smile crept across her face. "More like a foxtrot."

I visualized that image literally, and giggled. "You look so dorky in my imagination."

The 'shut up' was accompanied by a smack to the arm and something along the lines of me looking dorky in real life. Abuse is never a light situation, but I found myself enjoying Alice's.

Having a hard time staying on topic, we strayed off into the subject of dance (specifically, how horrible I was at it). Somewhere between the time of me fleeing my own house, to me sitting defeated in front of those elevators, the fear of this 'talk' had left me. This wasn't the interrogation that I had anticipated; instead, it was a normal conversation that I found very pleasant in its own simplicity. Though, with the gallon of gasoline in my stomach somewhat dissipated, I was actually curious to know what she thought of me. She _did _come here with a purpose - and I wanted to know what it was. Here speaks the wine.

"So, Alice;" I started, as another round of giggles had passed.

She examined me with a sideways glance. "Bella," She responded.

"Well, what do you think?" I asked. It was a simple enough start to a not-so-simple question, eliciting a confused look from Alice. I figured aiming straight for the target was the easiest way to get what I wanted. "I don't know how much of my confessional you heard;" I said. "But I think that I made it pretty clear that I . . ." And then I found myself trailing off, because that sentence seemed a lot easier to start than to finish. Alice looked at me expectantly, waiting.

"That you what?"

Oh, come on; she totally knew 'what'. It was practically spelled out in every word I spoke tonight.

"You know," I said, biting my lip; a habit I must've picked up from _somewhere_. "That I really like you." I said, and it was a half-truth because I just wasn't drunk yet.

"Oh," She said. She pushed a short piece of hair behind her ear, and I wished that I could've done it for her. "It's nice."

'_It's nice_'? Why does that not sound full of promise, splendor, and love-making? Great.

"I'd use that same phrase to describe my cat." I said, maybe frowning a little. I didn't have a cat, but I was speaking of the probable future.

Alice laughed, lightly. "I'm sorry." She said. "I don't know what to say. It _is_ nice though." She assured me.

Okay.

I felt as assured as a slug trying to cross a freeway.

"I do have to wonder, though." She said, eyes flicking towards the sky as she did. "Why?"

It took me a moment to realize what she was referring to. Was she asking me why I loved her? God, I wondered if she knew that she was requesting a twelve-hour soliloquy.

"Are you serious?" I asked. Surely, she should know the effect she had on people. It seemed crazy that she even had to ask.

"I'm serious; I want to know."

"That's easy," I started, only to find myself stuttering again. "I- you- uhh. You're sucking on your lip again." I finally managed, pointing out my current distraction. "What does that mean?"

Maybe it wasn't the right time to satisfy my curiosity on that topic, but I really wanted to know. I was also still figuring out how to answer her own question towards me.

She furrowed her eyebrows, only intensifying the cuteness. "I don't know. I guess I just do it when I'm waiting for something."

_Waiting, eh? _And what exactly was Alice Cullen waiting for?_  
_

She watched me patiently while I gathered my thoughts. I wondered what went on behind those eyes; what they were really looking at, what they were really seeing. They seemed to know much more than they let on, as had been proven to me before, and I couldn't help but wonder . . . Just how much did she know about me? The mask I wore had blanketed me from the unseeing eyes of Jasper, it had won the tolerance of Cooper, and the wisdom from Jacob. But what did _she_ see? Maybe she knew more than I did; I certainly didn't put it past her._  
_

After a moment's contemplation, I sighed. The only way to answer her question without rambling into incoherency, was to show her.

I gathered up my legs beneath me, and turned to face her. My hand found hers, and I wrapped my fingers around her wrist.

"Do you feel that?" I said, coaxing her to fold her legs and face me too.

She was looking into my eyes and not my hands when she responded. "It's warm."

I smiled slightly, and shook my head. "You're wrong. It's fire."

"Where?"

I tightened my grip in the most gentle way I could. "Right here."

I pulled her hand, guiding it towards my neck so that she could feel my pulse. It was quicker than usual, and I knew that she registered its meaning. "That too." I said, pressing her open palm into my skin. "Sometimes you make my heart beat so fast, I swear my ribcage will explode and I'll end up even more broken."

As she stared into my eyes, I couldn't help but think that maybe she wasn't really looking at them; that maybe she was seeing something else. I could have given a name for each and every shade of green in her own eyes, and perhaps she knew that too.

"And then sometimes I think that you've stopped my heart altogether; that my pulse isn't beating because it's stayed at some other time, some other place that you made it feel at home."

I let go of her hand, watching it retreat back into her lap, slowly. Then I touched the bricks beside us, running my fingers along the rough clay. "Being with you is like walking on thin air - it's knowing that I'm going to fall, or that I'm already falling; that it shouldn't be possible for me to be suspended in the sky like I am. But I keep walking, because it's all I can do." I smiled sadly at her, wondering if she believed that what I was saying was exactly how I felt. I was also aware that this was the first time I was honest her - completely and knowingly honest. "It's a little bit like flying."

"Bella," She said, some undecipherable emotion underlying her empathetic tone.

"Yeah?" My airy whisper floated past my lips, and my hand hover above her knee, almost asking permission.

She moved towards me and as I went in for a kiss, she went in for a hug; leaving me for plant my lips lightly into her hair. Not ashamed or disappointed, I let her hold me to her heart's content; feeling the warmth from her breath at the nape of my neck. "You know I care for you, right?" She said, speaking into my hair. "You're my best friend. It's just . . ."

I closed my eyes and nodded.

"I know, Alice. It's your choice."

...

I didn't plan to fall asleep on the roof, but Alice and I ended up talking throughout the whole night and fatigue had taken me over around sunrise. I awoke with the sun in my eyes, and Alice nowhere in sight. I took out my phone, which had somehow gotten tangled in my near-dreadlocks hair and saw a new message from her.

_6:48am - Alice Cullen_

_~ had a good time talking with you. had to go to work._

_coffee soon? my treat._

_:)_

I breathed in through my teeth._ Epic win!_

Well, not really a win - but she wanted to see me again, and that was win enough.

And in the midst of my mental happy dance, I also noticed the time was 8:45am; indicating my work day starting in fifteen minutes. Indicating just how late I would be.

_Mother fuu-_

The fact that I moved indescribably quick did not change the other fact that I was stuck in traffic, 15 minutes later. I groaned, letting my forehead hit the steering wheel of my immobile red truck.

At least it was Friday, so I should be cut some slack for being late. Then tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes afterwards.

In the midst of my near-slumber, the familiar ring of my phone buzzed through my pocket. I looked at the number - it was 508 number, meaning it was from Ashland; but it wasn't Jacob's.

_Who would be calling me from Ashland?_

"Hello?" I said, as I answered the call.

"Bella?"

I blinked at Edward's voice.

"Edward, hi." I said.

"Hey, what's up?"

Well, this was strange. "Driving to work, or should I say crawling. How did you get my number?"

"I stole it off Jacob's contact sheet on his fridge."

"Right. So you and Jacob are getting along, eh?"

I heard Edward chuckle from the other line. "Of course. In fact, I actually called you about that. Do you know where Jacob keeps his spare key?"

"To his cabin?"

"Yeah."

I furrowed my eyebrows in suspicion."Why do you want to get into his cabin?"

Another chuckle escaped Edward's mouth, and I could almost imagine him rubbing the back of his neck.

"I wanted to surprise him with lunch when he gets back from Sam's." He said.

The corner of my lip curled upwards. "_Surprise_ him?"

"With lunch." Edward affirmed.

"With lunch." I repeated.

"Yup, with lunch." He said. "We're on some sort of tomato-potato diet plan. I've got a fabulous recipe."

I mused over this in my head, silently.

"Edward," I started.

"Yeah?"

"Are you. . ."

"-Waiting for you to tell me how to invade Jacob's house? Yes."

"No. But it kind of sounds like-"

"I'm growing facial hair, waiting for you."

"Hey, let me ask my question!"

Edward laughed. "Don't get rowdy, let's hear it."

I cleared my throat. "Edward, are you guys-"

"I'm into Jacob and he's into me, and we're both gay." He supplied quickly.

_Whoa_. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

"-and I really like him, so will you tell me where his spare key is?"

_Oh my God, this entire world is gay! Overpopulation will cease to be an issue . . .  
_

"Under the rock beside his petunias." I said involuntarily.

"Thanks, Bella."

"Wait-" I said, processing the information. "This is so exciting, no way! I had no idea you guys were-"

"Friendly?" Edward said, and I could practically hear his smile.

I laughed. "No, I definitely knew you guys were _friendly_ with one another; I just didn't think you guys were-"

"Banging?" Edward supplied.

"Well, yeah." I answered sheepishly.

"Well, thanks to you, I was able to meet him. So I guess I owe you one." He said.

"Don't mention it. But holy crap!"

"Crazy, right?"

"Definitely." I breathed.

"How're you and Alice, by the way?"

A '_psssh_' left my mouth. "We're nothing."

"Sounds like something."

"You don't know anything." I said, brushing off his comment.

"You're not the only one who talks to her, you know." He said back to me.

_What's that supposed to mean?_

"- listen, I've got to go; Jacob is gonna be back in like an hour and everything has to be perfectly gay when he gets here."

"Wait! You totally can't just leave me with that cliff hanger." I complained.

Edward laughed. "I'll talk to you later. Or maybe Jacob will. See you!"

The line went dead at the same time "Edward!" passed my lips.

I hadn't even realized that I was sitting at a green light.

I shook my head._ This world is so strange._

* * *

**I really couldn't wait for the Edward-Jacob gay confession to come out, so I stuck it in early. I know you were all looking for an Alice-Bella kiss, but guess who sucks? - ME. Deal with it, bros. **

**There's a lot more that I have planned for this story, so stick around. Tbh, I won't update as frequently because I usually drive to my girl's house after I do some work, then come back home and fall asleep - but I'll definitely try. I'm not even gonna mention all the crap I have to do for student council . . .  
**

**I threw this chapter up because it's been so long and I felt terrible, so bear with me. **

**I miss you guys, thanks for all the messages in my absence. **

**Have a good one!**

**p.s. Before you mention it, HOW THE FUCK COULD I _NOT_ INCLUDE A REBECCA BLACK REFERENCE? LOL.  
**


	17. Polysporin

**Well look what we've got here. A year later and finally an update? Lol I'd be surprised if you guys even remember me! **

**As promised, I'm going to finish this story. I'm a handful of chapters away anyways. I apologize if my writing style or story in this chapter isn't very consistent with the earlier ones. It's been a while! Here's a shorter chapter I wrote in one sitting to get the ball rolling again. **

**Enjoy!**

* * *

The kitchen was thick with the smell of _organic_ and reeked of vegetarian. Alice was going to jizz when she got home. I threw in the garlic onto the pan and backed my head away as it sizzled in the oil. Gingerly tossing it around with the spatula, I turned to Jasper who was chopping potatoes behind me. "Are you sure this is right? Why is it being so violent?" I asked, gesturing to the onions and garlic that were splashing hot oil a foot high from the pan. Jasper came and turned the heat down to medium, adding some cubed tofu into the mix.

"Yeah, everything's perfect. Turn those 'til they they're golden, then sprinkle that magic sauce over 'em sweetheart." He said, pointing over to the bowl of brownish-black liquid.

"Isn't this just soy sauce with chili flakes?" I asked, picking it up and swirling it around. The little chili flakes came up to the surface before getting dragged down again and out of sight.

"Hey, it's still my special concoction." He said, defending himself.

We cooked happily side by side, preparing Jasper's 'famous' meal of tofu lasagna. Aka I googled up a recipe and Jasper thought the picture looked decent enough to give it a shot. It was Alice's last night here since the renovations on her condo were finished, and we were going to surprise her with this fantastic meal of tofu on carbs.

I was stuffing shredded lettuce between a layer of lasagna noodles when Cooper came up and took a whiff of our creation. He wafted the air to his nose with waggling fingers and breathed deeply. "B-A-eautiful! Now when can I order the pizza?" He asked, leaning against the counter.

I thrust the bowl of lettuce into his hands. "We can't just order pizza every time we have a vegetarian night." I said, opening the oven to check on the baked potatoes. "Can you finish stuffing that?"

Cooper went to work finishing my lettuce job. "Sure thing. . . So did you guys figure it would taste better by shoving every vegetable possible into this pie?" He asked, poking around at the eggplant and tomato mix underneath the lettuce.

"It's lasagna, not a pie." I said. That vegetable cake-thing took forever to make, it at least deserved proper identification! "And it was rated 4 and a half stars online."

"Four out of ten?"

"Shut up," I said, taking a step back and looking at the food prepared. Okay, so it didn't exactly look like the picture in the recipe - but it looked as healthy as ever. Sure it more resembled quiche making love to a pile of vegetable scraps, but vegetarians dig that, right? Oh yeah, Alice would definitely dig this.

Cooper shrugged, pouring the remains of his lettuce bowl into the lasagna. "At least it's just one more night."

I half-nodded my agreement. Sure, Alice was going to be gone and her leafy diet along with that - but the ordeal made me a little sad. Alice was leaving. I wasn't working with her any more, so what other casual purpose would there be for me to see her? Even though I had to deal with the implosion of my heart every time her and Jasper were together, I was gonna miss that little Raven in our flat. I was gonna miss her barging into my room for little this-and-thats, and eating dinner with her babbling on about health benefits, and crashing onto opposing couches after a long day. I was going to miss everything about her.

_Humph_.

On the other hand, maybe it was a good thing she was leaving. With all the things blowing up in the recent weeks, maybe I needed a break from her. My personal space would be my personal space again -_ that_ oughta clear my head a bit.

Whatever the case, I didn't have much choice in the matter anyways.

Dinner finished cooking and we set the table to look fairly better than usual. Jasper put some weird elevator-type music on in the background and I made a face at him. "It's supposed to help digestion." He shrugged, turning the volume down to a low hum.

After a few minutes of us sitting around, Alice finally came back from the studio. She entered the flat like a light turning on in a dark room. Flashy, bright, and radiant, all eyes were on her as she glided through the door looking as perfect as ever. Alice was wearing her business attire, an arrangement of nicely fitted black and white that accentuated her figure much to my benefit. I looked down at my outfit - a baggy sweater and jeans with holes near at the thighs and knees. _Meh._

"Alice!" Jasper thundered from the couch, getting up to greet his girlfriend.

"Hey," She said, kissing Jasper and waving to Coop and I. "Wow, it smells . . . interesting."

Jasper grinned. "Yeah, it's your last night so we tried to put effort into tonight's meal." He said. It was true - for Alice's dinner Jasper usually just threw some greens together and put salad dressing on the side. A hot plate was a definite upgrade.

"Oh, you're so thoughtful baby." She chirped, giving him another peck on the lips before coming to put her bags down in the couch area.

"Actually," He chuckled. "It was Bella's idea."

Alice looked over at me, and I just gave a warm smile. "In that case, I redirect that thanks to you." She said.

"Well, it was a team effort." I responded, feeling satisfied with her praise, however little.

Alice went to go change into her casual clothes - clothes that could still upscale me on my best days - and we started eating dinner immediately. The lasagna was straight out of the oven and surprisingly tasty. Cooper had most of it. The potatoes were a nice crisp on the outside and soft on the inside. What's that? - a dinner that actually didn't suck monkeyballs? Who said old dogs can't learn new tricks!

We talked mostly about Jasper's upcoming trip to Detroit to meet with some label heads - he was going to be gone for a few weeks.

"Can you pass the lasagna, Coop?" I asked, reaching my hands over as he passed me the tray. I tried balancing it on one hand while scooping with the other, a maneuver that was in no way smart or logical. The tray tipped from my fingers and lasagna spilled onto my lap in a cloud of steam. "Ow ow ow!" I yelped, jumping back from my seat.

Jasper was beside me in a split second with napkins, and the table expressed their concerns. Wow, that food was hot.

"Ouch," I said, as Jasper dabbed at my lap.

"Sorry Chimes." He said apologetically, handing the napkins to me. I took over, wiping the sauce from my pants. I was picking eggplant out of the holes in my pants when Alice spoke.

"Hey, we better run some water over that in case you've got some burns." She said.

Cooper offered his glass to me. "Here!"

I looked at Coop's outstretched hand, over to his eager expression, and then made eye contact with Alice. We both stifled a laugh. The pixie steered Cooper's cup back to the table with one hand and took my arm with the other. "No thanks Coop, we need a washroom for this one."

A quick glance at all the splattered lasagna on myself and the floor, as well as Jasper starting to wipe it all up made me feel bad. "Sorry guys." I said meekly, feeling embarrassed that I managed to ruin dinner with my clumsiness. I let Alice's hand pull me up from the chair and support me as we headed to the washroom.

Alice had me sit on the toilet with the seat cover down as she ran a face towel with cold water.

"Does it hurt?" She asked me, squeezing out the excess water from the towel.

I shook my head. "Not really anymore. This type of stuff always happens to me."

"I get the feeling." She laughed.

"When I was making the lasagna a few hours ago, I didn't expect it to end up in my pants." I said sheepishly. I rested my hands on my knees, waiting for Alice's next move.

Alice closed the door to the bathroom and turned to me. "Those jeans are gonna have to come off." She said, getting on her knees in front of me.

I suddenly felt the need to cough out an entire lung. "Wh-what?" I sputtered.

Alice's cheek twinged red the slightest bit. If I wasn't so taken aback then I'd be proud of myself - I didn't even know it was possible to embarrass this girl. "No," She supplied quickly, holding up the towel. "I have to run the water on your burn. I can't do it through your pants."

I felt my own face get warm and fought the urge to face-palm. "Oh, yeah. Totally." I said. What was I even thinking?

Awkward awkward awkward.

Okay. _I can do this without making myself look incompetent_.

I lifted my hips off the toilet seat and tried to shimmy my pants off my hips. The rough fabric was rubbing against my irritated skin. "Ouch,_ that_ hurts."

Alice's eyebrows pulled together in concern. "Here, let me help." She said, grabbing my waistband and rolling it down to avoid contact with the burn. _Thank God I wore good underwear today_. A small hiss escaped from between her lips as the pants got stuck around my knee area. All the sticky sauce had made it difficult to come off smoothly. An assortment of adorable sounds came from her throat as she tugged my jeans free.

Clearly pleased with herself, she raised an eyebrow at me. I continued to stare at her coolly, admiring her to the fullest. "Stop looking at me like that." She said, with a smug little smile playing on her face.

"You're cute, you know that?" I stated, allowing myself to admit a small truth. Alice didn't answer, but I saw her features soften to acknowledge my comment. I didn't know if she liked my newfound attentions or not, but I found that I was even moreso comfortable around her now that she knew my secret. It was like I didn't have anything to hide anymore - I could now express my inner raging lesbian.

Alice squeezed some water onto my reddened thighs, letting it drip from the rag and onto my skin. Sweet baby jesus that felt good. "Ahh," I said, wincing as she lowered the fabric to my leg.

She gently wiped away the sauce that was caking to my albino skin. "Looks like a first-degree burn. Doesn't seem too bad though, you probably won't feel it tomorrow."

Alice got up to wet the towel again and take a tube of polysporin from the cabinet. She returned in front of me, repeating the water process before wiping my thigh down again. When my legs were vegetable-free, she squeezed a bit of the polysporin onto the tip of her pointer finger and gently applied it to the red blotches patterning my skin. My breath caught as she first touched me, working in the cream and soothing the dull throb from my skin's surface. Even though she was fixing up my burn, it still felt pretty intimate. I was locked up in a small room with Alice Cullen, and she was rubbing my bare thighs. _Hell yeahhhh._

"You're really good at that. This. Taking care of me, I mean." My words came out in a bit of a jumble, but she got the idea.

Alice chuckled, screwing the lid back onto the polysporin tube. "Grow up with Edward and you end up learning a thing or two about patching up battle scars."

I smiled at her, leaning back against the toilet. I sat like that for a solid thirty seconds, just letting myself enjoy her presence. How could I have only met this girl now? Why, when it was already so late? I wanted her so badly, but it was more than that - I admired her wholeheartedly. The way she had led me to washroom and taken care of me, gracefully cleaning my wounds and tending to them - that was just one facet of the kindness etched into her personality. She was flawless. Beautiful inside and out. She was like music carried over to me from a distance; I couldn't touch her, be with her, or have her, only appreciate her when she was there. Jasper was one lucky son of a bitch.

I pulled my knees up to my chin - _ouch_, not the greatest idea. I ignored the sting and wrapped my arms around my folded legs. "I wish I knew you earlier." I said, more to myself than to her.

Alice placed the polysporin back in the cabinet, closing the mirror door. She looked at me curiously. "Why's that?"

I chuckled into my knees, letting my lips press against the knobby joint. "A lot of reasons." I said, letting my shoulders rise and fall. As I expected, Alice didn't respond - it was her way of prompting me to continue. I understood the nonverbal cue, daring to explain further. "If I met you before Jasper, and before Tanya," I started, knowing that I was treading a bit of thin ice. "I think I could make you like me."

Alice's eyes narrowed and she smirked. "You seem pretty confident about that." She quipped, as if I just presented a challenge.

I shrugged my shoulders at her. "Well, you're not denying it." I said. I knew it was a stretch, but I was partly teasing her too. I wondered if it could be true though - would she go for me had she not been with Jasper? She'd rejected all my advances as of yet - I doubt she'd want anything to do with me.

"Hey, you haven't given me time to answer yet!" She complained.

My hands went into the air, gesturing her to continue. "By all means."

"Before I met Tanya and Jasper I was a very different person." She said, her voice going a pitch higher than usual. Was she evading my question?

"Well?"

"Well?" She repeated.

"True or false, I'd have a chance with you if I had met you a few years back?" I asked. The air in my lungs was stagnant, waiting for her response. Her face was confusing me - she was doing that lip-biting thing as if she was deciding on what would be the most appropriate answer. _She wants to let me down easy. _I figured.

Alice rubbed her eyes with her thumb and forefinger, chuckling before locking on my gaze. "What makes you think you'd only have a chance a few years ago, Bella?"

* * *

**Comments are very welcome, seeing as I only skimmed the previous chapters and I might have missed some details to the story line! Hope I'm not letting you guys down :)**


	18. Nothin' Special

**Taking this in a bit of a different direction than I had originally planned, but it all ends up the same when I finish! **

**I think I just wanted to write in some Cooper, haha. **

**Enjoy.**

* * *

One of the greatest things about Cooper was that he was always up for a night out - regardless of where it was. Watching him get hit on by a particularly persistent gay man in this particularly gay bar was one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. He clearly had no idea how to handle the situation.

"Oh, I seriously just thought you were a waiter!" Cooper tried to explain, trying to shove money into the man's hands. The guy had come over to our table, chatting us up and asking if he could get Cooper a drink. Coop enthusiastically said he'd like a beer. The guy had '_boop_'-ed Cooper's nose before skipping away to the bar happily. Maybe I was guilty for not informing Cooper of this guy's flamboyant intentions, but I figured I could use a laugh.

The man frowned, placing the beers on our table and pushing his glasses farther up his nose. "So you let me buy you a drink, and you're not even into men?" He asked, obviously annoyed.

"God no! I'm into women!" Cooper said, a little flustered. The gay guy tightened his face, very offended by the seemingly vindictive tone. I suppressed my giggles; anyone who knew Cooper would know he wasn't trying to be a dick, he was just less eloquent with his expressions. In fact, he was probably trying his best _not_ to sound vindictive. "Not that there's anything wrong with being into men!" He hastily added, catching onto the man's expression. "Being a man, into men, I mean. It's just not my boat - but I do love the boat! And the people on it! I love it from my own boat."

Cooper's eyebrows were pushed together, his hands in the air frozen in motion - he was trying to think of the right words to explain. The gay man crossed his arms, looking unimpressed.

With an amused smile, I decided to end Cooper's ramble before it started. "Forgive my friend," I said in a warm tone. I leaned into the offended-looking man's ear and whispered at a volume that Cooper wouldn't catch. "He's new to the scene - a closeted gay in denial. You know how it is." I said.

As I back away, a laugh tinkled out of the man's mouth and he smiled at me. "Alright, keep the beers - you guys could use 'em." He looked at an oblivious Cooper and winked. "Come back to this bar when your feet warm up."

Cooper screwed up his face, confused. I thanked the nice man, who gave me a knowing look, and he left our table. "What did you tell him?" He asked.

My lip twitched with a smirk. "A secret."

Curls bounced to and fro as Coop shook his head. "I'm never gonna understand you gays."

We sipped our beers to Lady Gaga beats, and talked idly. It was both of our first times at a gay bar, and we didn't really know the drill. For the most part, it was Cooper that had to fend off the inquisitive men.

"Looks like you're the one that's gonna get laid tonight." I said, laughing as Cooper had to awkwardly turn down yet another male offering drinks. He had pulled out the boat reference - I was gonna have to talk to him about that one.

Cooper ran a hand through his hair, pushing it back out of his face. "I have no idea why so many people are interested in me here. Why can't ladies flock me like this!"

I shook my head, a smile on my lips. "It's your hair. You look like a giant girl."

"Because I'm beautiful, right?"

I pretended to avert my gaze and did the '_yikes_' motion with my mouth. "Definitely."

Cooper laughed, downing the rest of his drink. "Listen, Bella." He said, leaning over the table for my full attention. "Tonight is for_ you_. Let's just pick a girl and get 'er done! You deserve it!" He said, his tone excited. I could feel the excitement coming off him - he really thought this would fix things.

My gaze fell down to my fingers, picking at the label on my beer bottle. This was Cooper's grand plan - he figured I needed some time to recuperate from Alice's reign. She had been in our lives - what? three or four months - and it was pretty clear to all that I hadn't been the same since. As his own personal intervention, he insisted that we come to the bar in order to get me resocialized.

Puh-_lease_.

I couldn't even talk coherently with Alice, and she was my best friend. As if I could talk to another girl and get her to go home with me. There was no logic in that head of his.

Sweeping my eyes across the bar - which wasn't too packed for a Thursday night - I let myself take in all the potential people I could make a move on. Immediately, my head started jutting out reasons not to be attracted to them. One by one, my inner voice matched them up with a corresponding judgement.

_Too tall. _

_Scary piercings._

_Bad imitation of Alice's hair cut._

_Too sloppy._

_Was that one even a girl?_

I rubbed my forehead. "Really, Coop - do we have to do this?" I groaned.

Cooper looked at me like I had just asked if I should flush the toilet after using it. "Of course you do. How do you know what you want if you don't try new things?" He said, pointing to a brunette standing by the bar. "Here, how about that one?"

"That's a man, Cooper." On cue, the guy turned to order another drink and his luscious brown hair was accompanied by a burly beard. "And I know what I want, it only consists of one thing. I want Alice."

"And you can have her," He assured me, brushing off my dejections. "But tonight, you can have other things too. If you catch my drift. . ." He said.

I rolled my eyes at him. This is why I have never had, and will never develop feelings for Cooper. He just didn't understand emotions! I knew he was just trying to look out for me, and maybe it was true - maybe I did need a good time; but I didn't feel in the mental state to indulge in it. "I think it's different for boys. Girls don't just get with people just because they can."

"- Sure they do," He interjected.

"No," I countered. "Boys just like to think they do. Like, girls don't just get laid and suddenly things get better. It's a complex."

"Alright, alright. So what are you saying?"

I ripped off the label I'd been trying to peel for the past ten minutes. Satisfied that my small task was finished, I let my brow pull together as I thought about his question. What _was_ I saying? Like a growing orb in the pit of my stomach, I felt a bit of a rant starting to form. Taking a deep breath, I started.

"I'm _saying_, that trying to be with other people probably won't change the way I feel about Alice. That's something I have to resolve on my own. I can't keep trying to look for ways around it - I have to face it, and do _something_ about it. Or I swear I'll go crazy." I didn't usually vent to Coop, mostly because he didn't understand what I was trying to say half the time; but I was also figuring this stuff out on my own as I was saying it. Either way, beers at a bar is way cheaper than therapy.

"Those are my choices, Coop - I have to either go for her, or move on. I can't just keep hanging in there, waiting around for her to notice me. I look back on these past few months and I see myself being such a coward. I just floated alongside whatever path Alice took, I never asked her for anything. I never asked her to love me back, or to leave Jasper. I never even asked if she liked me. If it hasn't happened by now, it's because I'm not approaching it the right way. Wait. Wait, that's_ it_! - I'm not approaching this the right way at all!" I said, with newfound fervor. It was my own eureka moment. I looked up at Cooper with a certain fire in my eyes - I'm sure it startled him because he back his face away. But I was having my moment - realization washing over me like a tidal wave. "Don't you see? I've just been waiting for her this whole time! Waiting until I can see her again; waiting until she talks to me; waiting for her to show me what's okay and what's not. Waiting, waiting, waiting - I'm so fucking stupid. Why would she want me if I haven't even been making an effort to be something more? I need to stop hoping she'll come to me, and instead, go to her. That's what I need to do! Because you're right - I do deserve more than this; and it's pretty sad that this is my first time saying it. I deserve to be with Alice or at least to move along without her!" I said, smacking down my bottle on the table with more force than necessary. This was a good rant. "Damn, I love this bar!"

A few heads turned to see the small commotion from the over-excited brunette in the corner. I didn't notice any of them, I was too busy having a revelation. Cooper nodded his head thoughtfully, seeming to absorb what I said. Slowly, he responded. "So what you're saying is. . . We need to make sure you get laid pronto, pronto, pronto. You are wound up tight as fuck."

I rolled my eyes and took out my phone, sending Alice a text message.

* * *

I woke up with my face in an unfamiliar pillow. Stretching my arms out, I yawned loudly and shook my head. It wasn't surprising that I was so groggy - not after all the drinks last night. I pulled the sheets up to my neck, twisting as I stretched my back. The girl beside me stirred, rubbing her lips together as she slept.

Okay, so Cooper was right. Getting laid was a good thing.

I looked over at the blonde beside me, her hair blanketing her bare back. I wasn't one for one night stands, but Coop had provided a fairly reasonable argument.

_"Everyone needs to get laid, Bella!" He hissed, as the blonde from the bar beckoned me over. _

_I turned to him, suddenly nervous. "I won't even know what to do!" _

_"That's what this is - practice. Go on!"_

_"But I don't feel anything for her."_

_"Obviously, you just met her. She's hot, though." Cooper said._

_I nodded. Yeah, she was pretty. So what? Alice was beautiful. _

_"Alice didn't answer your text yet." Cooper stated, indicating the phone in my hands. I had been on the lookout for her message for an hour now, with no reply. "She's sleeping with someone else - you're allowed to, too." _

_"That's not the point, Coop."_

_"No, the point is, you just made a big fucking deal about taking control. You said you want Alice, or you want to be able to move on without her. Play the field, Bella! You're an adult."_

_I sighed, looking over at the blonde. Well, she was pretty. "A statement, then. That I can get along fine without Alice." I finally said._

_"Exactly!" _

_"An assertion of independence." I added._

_"That's more like it."_

_"- Because it isn't fair that I put everything on hold for her, if she won't even glance my way."_

_"A boost of confidence!"_

_I nodded, starting to feel pumped up. Something primal in my blood, starting to surface. Alice might not want me, but other people did. And that felt damn good. _

_ "Alright, let's do this." I said, emptying the rest of my beer. I hopped off my seat, a determined look in my eye._

_Cooper grinned, sending me off in the direction of the bar. "Go get 'em, tiger."_

The blonde's name was something along the lines of Kate. Or Katie. Or maybe I just called her that.

She was pretty easy to talk to; of course I was very awkward at first. She thought it was pretty adorable that it was my first 'gay night out' and I hadn't been with a girl before - from there she took the reins.

I needn't explain further.

Of course I had my doubts and nerves, but I reasoned myself out of them throughout the night. Like Cooper said, this was _practice_. It didn't mean anything, so why should I let my feelings for Alice get in the way of a good time? Of course I would still pursue her, but I'd continue to live my life as well. I couldn't spend all my time waiting for her. She hadn't even answered my text last night, so you can't say I didn't try.

Still, I felt a pang of unease for sleeping with another girl. I couldn't put a finger on it. Half of it was that I wanted my first anything with a girl to be with Alice. The other half was that I liked it - the surge of power I felt when I had done something for myself, finally. I was mixed up, so to speak.

Thinking about the text, I grabbed my phone from the bedside table. I had two new messages and a missed call. All from Alice.

Oops.

_12:37am - Alice Cullen_

_Hey Bella, kinda having a rough night. I could use a hang out._

_12:46am - Alice Cullen_

_Free to talk? Or are you sleeping?_

Well, I wasn't sleeping at that time, per say. I was just. . . _busy_. I guess I hadn't been paying attention to my phone when we'd gotten back to Kate's flat.

I swung my legs off the bed, pushing my hair back behind both ears. It was pretty early, my internal alarm clock woke me up for work. Today was a half-day, though, so I didn't have to rush it.

Grabbing my clothes from the floor quickly, I decided I better get home.

* * *

**Lalalala, these are easy to write. Why did I wait so long?**


	19. Scratching the Surface

**Hey guys; putting up another chapter quickly so you have something for the weekend :P**

**I might be starting another story too. Keep your eyes peeled!  
**

* * *

Upon entering the flat, I was well aware of the commotion inside. As soon as I walked through the door, I was caught in the crossfire of a lovers quarrel.

"If you wanna go, then just go!" Alice shouted, trailing behind a grim-looking Jasper. The cowboy was carrying his saxophone case in one hand, and a duffel bag in the other. _Whaaaat?_

"You know I don't have a choice." Jasper said, sternly. He didn't look happy at all, only acknowledging me with a nod of his head before sweeping past me.

"Uhh, hey. What's going on here?" I asked. My question was ignored as Alice followed her boyfriend out the door._ I thought Jasper wasn't leaving for another few days?_

Alice shook her head, clearly pissed off. "That's bullshit. I had plans too, that I cancelled."

I stood in the doorway, not knowing if I should try to help diffuse the situation or sneak into my room and let them battle it out. I'd never seen them fight like this; hell, I've never seen them _fight_. I poked my head out, to see them in the hallway.

Jasper spun on his heel, coming chest to chest with Alice. "Plans? These aren't_ plans_, Alice; this is my life. It's my career, not something I can just reschedule. It's what I've been waiting for."

"You knew for a few days, you should have told me-"

Jasper cut her off. "- I've been trying to! I haven't been able to bring it up lately because all we've been doing is fighting. It's always something; always this, always that - I don't get what's been going on!"

I pulled my head back into the flat. That was definitely _not_ my fight. Walking straight into Cooper's room, I left the door open and crashed on his bed. He was at his desk, typing some emails.

"What the flying fuck is going on in here?" I asked, turning to face my friend.

"A fight. Hello to you, too!" He said.

"I can see that. _Why_ are they fighting? Since when do they fight?" I asked, ignoring his greeting.

"Oh, I'm good too, thanks for asking. No, I don't have a hangover - how's yours?" He continued, exaggeratedly making a point to high-five himself.

"Coop!" I said, impatiently.

Cooper laughed, continuing to write his email. "Y'know, this and that. They fight a lot actually, nothing big, just back and forth arguments."

"How do you know?"

He pointed to the vent above his bed. "Just lately. I hear it through the wall. Gosh, I hear far too much from their side of the wall for my liking." He said, scrunching up his nose in a disturbed expression.

I mirrored his face, catching on to what he was insinuating. "Ew."

"Tell me about it. Anyway, today's a biggy. Jasper's flying out early because he got a meeting with some better labels." Cooper said.

My eyes widened. "Isn't it their one and a half year anniversary this week?" I asked. Apparently the day had a lot of meaning to them; something something about it taking a year and a half for Jasper to confess his love for Alice more or less. I didn't really care to know.

"Yeah, so Alice is pretty pissed. It was more of a build-up thing if you ask me." Cooper said. I sort of understood where he was coming from - sure, missing out on their special day must suck, but did it really warrant them yelling at each other? I wanted to wrap my head around it.

He finished up his email and turned me, grinning like a dog. Oh, I so knew what was coming next.

"So, that blonde last night?" He asked, leaving the question open ended.

Instantly my face turned red. It wasn't anything to really be embarrassed about, but I just felt kind of shy about my night. I wasn't one to sleep around, and _everybody_ knew that. "Yeah . . ." I said, trailing off.

Cooper laughed, joining me on the bed. "So, how'd it go?" He prompted.

Instead of telling him details, I simply grabbed the collar of my shirt and tugged it downward, exposing several hickeys on the base of my neck and collarbone. Cooper lit up with excitement. "That's the way to do it!" He said, bouncing the bed in a way that made my head hurt. "Did you like it?"

I chuckled, rolling over to shove my face in his pillow. "Obviously. Hence the not coming home part."

"Yeah!" Cooper squealed.

Just then, Alice stormed past the open door. Cooper and I exchanged a glance, and he shrugged. "Maybe you should go talk to her." He suggested. "Cheer her up."

Alice's head appeared in the doorway again, seeming to have back-peddled. Before I could open my mouth to speak, Alice spoke first. "Where were you last night?" She asked. I was startled by the demanding tone in her voice. She was clearly very upset by what happened between her and Jasper moments earlier, and I could feel some of that anger being directed towards me.

With my mouth still hanging open, Cooper and I exchanged yet another glance. Cooper spoke first. "Bella went home with a chick from the bar." He said.

The muscles in Alice's face tightened. She looked to me as if she needed confirmation, and I just stared back with my mouth slightly agape. That seemed to push her off the edge. "Are you fucking serious?" She said, more to herself than to anyone else. We heard a door slam in the hall, and then the house was silent.

Cooper gave me a look. "Did I say the wrong thing?"

I pushed him out of the way as I jumped off his bed. "You always say the wrong thing." I said, as I made my way to Jasper's room.

I stood outside of Jasper's door, debating whether to knock or just let myself in. Instead, I went to the kitchen and leafed through the fridge. There they were. I chopped up the celery and put them in a nice bowl before going back to Jasper's room. After two sets of knocks with no answer, I turned the knob and slipped in.

Alice looked up at me from behind her laptop.

She eyed me as I sat on the edge of the bed, and placed the celery on the table top beside us. "What's that for?" She asked me.

I shrugged, looking at the bowl lazily. "You. It's Friday."

"So?"

"So, you prefer them to carrots today." I said. I played with the edge of the sheets, my fingers rubbing at the thing material. I wasn't sure exactly what to say. I was pretty bad at comforting people.

When I looked up at Alice's face, her features had softened though she looked even more upset. "Are you okay?" I asked. It was a generic question for these types of situations, but it was all I had.

Alice sighed, her face brightening a bit after her long exhale. "Jasper's just being stupid, is all." She said. Alice closed her laptop, gentle fingers placing it beside her.

"So he's flying out a week earlier?" I asked.

Alice's eyes fluttered, and she leaned against the headboard. Taking a piece of celery, she held it between her fingers as she talked. "Yup. He's on his way now." There was a bitter taste to her sentence, and I got the feeling that I didn't even know the half of it.

I nodded, watching Alice slowly chomp on her piece of celery. She looked so careful, taking each bite like she was being marked for etiquette. "He's missing your year and half, eh?" I said. I wanted to be careful not to stoke the fire, but I wanted Alice to feel like she could confide in me, too.

"Yeah, that's a bust. We had plans to spend the weekend in Washington with my family." She said, taking a bite of her celery. "But it's good for him, getting all these calls and meetings. It's what he wants. It's hard to make it these days as a jazz player, people aren't into that stuff, y'know?" She said.

"Yeah, I know." I responded. Except I didn't know - I was in my own bubble half the time and knew nothing about the music industry. Whatever. "He's just doing what's best for him and his career." I said.

"Exactly, and I shouldn't be mad at him for it. _Can't_ be mad at him for it. I think I was just really counting on this weekend to fix things."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Fix things?" I questioned. Had I not seen the display today, I would never have guessed that anything needed fixing.

Alice held the bowl of celery out to me, and I declined her offer with a shake of my head. "Him and I have been fighting lately, that's all. I'm getting more riled up about things than I should. It's my fault, really."

"No it's not," I cooed. I apparently didn't know much about their relationship, but I couldn't see Alice being the one to blame.

"Yes, it is." She assured me. "I just feel like we want different things. We're growing to want things that we can't get from the relationship we have now."

I shook my head, crawling over to sit beside her. "Don't talk like that, alright? Things will work out. You guys love each other." I said. Where I was getting these words of comfort was beyond me, but I just wanted her to feel better. I didn't like seeing her like this, all upset and unsure. I was so used to seeing her radiant and confident in all her doings.

"That doesn't always help," She laughed, bitterly. I threw an arm around her, and pulled her into a friendly embrace. She was leaning her head on my shoulder, when her eyes turned towards me. Following her gaze, I knew she was looking at my hickeys. "So what was she like?" She asked me.

The question took me by surprise, I didn't think that that was something she'd be interested in. I cleared my throat, coughing into my free hand. "Oh, you know . . ." I started, not sure what I wanted to tell her.

"Was she pretty?" She asked.

Another unexpected question. "Uhh, yeah. Yes. Cooper thought so."

"And you did, too?"

"- What? Uhh, yeah - I guess so."

"You guess so?"

"Okay, yeah, she was pretty. We just had a good time, it was nothin' special." I said. She was sort of weirding me out with all these questions. Was this girl gossip? Or did I just find it weird because it was Alice that I was talking to?

Alice sighed. "It would have been nice to talk to you last night; Jasper and I had a row. Over stupid things, of course."

"I'm sorry, I probably should have checked my phone-"

"No," Alice said. "You were busy, I get it."

"But I want to be there when you need me, Alice."

"But you can't always be. A girl like you is gonna have a lot of swooning girls at your disposal, I suppose."

I blinked. A girl like me? "What's that supposed to mean?"

Alice waved it off. "Forget it. So are you seeing her again?" The pixie asked me, her eyes inquisitive.

Again I was stumbling to answer her spitfire questions. "No. I don't intend to."

"I didn't take you for the type that slept around."

"- I don't!" I defended.

"You had no problem sleeping with a complete stranger last night."

"What - I- I-"

"And no problem letting her put her mouth wherever, so it seems."

"Wait," I instinctively pulled my collar up, covering what I could. Why was she being so aggressive about this? I narrowed my eyes. No, she couldn't be - "Are you _jealous_?" I asked, in disbelief.

Alice lifted her head away from me. "What? _No_." She said, getting defensive herself.

I shook my head. That was it! She _was_ jealous. "Yes you are!" I pressed.

"Don't flatter yourself."

"Then why do you even care who I sleep around with? Why would you be bothered?" I demanded. That had to be it, she had to be jealous! A flame burned within me, and I felt anger threatening to make its way from my stomach to my mouth. She had no right to be. No right at all! How many nights have I seen her disappear into her bedroom with Jasper?

"I _don't_ care, and I'm _not_ bothered." She said through gritted teeth. But I knew her. If she didn't care, then this wouldn't make her angry - she would laugh it off. She was proving me right and we both knew it.

"Bullshit!" I said, and I didn't know I was doing it, but somehow I had brought my hand up behind her head and had my fingers tangled in that short raven hair. My call to her bluff hung in the air like a heavy cloud, and I was so close to her face now that I could feel her short breaths tickling my lips. We stayed like that, eye to eye, and I could've kissed her right there and then. I could've pulled her face closer and mashed my lips onto hers, but we stayed as statues instead.

Alice was the first to break the eye contact, pulling away from me. I let her slip past my fingers, and she adjusted herself so that she was resting her head on my lap. "I'm sorry, Bella. See? I'm picking a fight with everyone." She said, and I could hear her voice being genuine. She was angry with herself, that much I could see.

I was filled with an uncontrollable urge to gather her up in my arms, throw a blanket over us, and stay like that. But I'd have to be getting to work soon.

"For no reason, too. I'm just fucking things up." She continued.

I stroked her hair, tenderly. "No, I'm sorry. I should be here for you, not giving you more things to worry about."

"No, you are here with me. It's helping." She said, speaking softly into my pant legs.

"We can talk about it," I offered.

She shook her head. "Not a conversation for you and I."

"Wha-"

"Not now at least." She finished. Alice turned her head, looking up at me. Her green eyes locked onto mine, and a miniscule smile played on her lips. "I'm mixed up." She said, laughing to herself.

I nodded, feeling the soft, comforting rumble of her body on my lap. I couldn't help but smile too; _there's the Alice I love._

"I know how you feel." I said. I took her hand and squeezed it reassuringly; all that mattered right now is that she felt better. That was my job, seeing as Jasper wasn't around. "Tell you what, stick around the flat and when I come back from work, you and I can chat more. We'll put in a cheesy movie."

Alice's face brightened, deepening the lines on her smile. "Yeah, I'd like that." Her eyes flicked up to the ceiling for a few seconds, and then back into my own. "Thanks for the celery."

* * *

**Well, what'dya think?**

**Got a new story going called Hitman, btw. Check it out :P  
**


	20. Another Sleepless Night

**Well, look who's back from the dead. Hi guys. **

**Spent some time in other fandoms . . . Didn't quite fit in like I did here. Missed all of you! Hope to make it up to you guys by finishing off this story. There's still quite a bit more to go. **

**As for this chapter, it's kind of me just dipping my feet back in. I haven't written or read this story in a while, so I apologize for any inconsistencies in writing style, character development/personality, or storyline. I would really appreciate reviews to see how you guys like it, as my writing style has changed a lot. **

**Another note: I don't like writing introductions. But they have to get done (and there are so many family members, oh gee), so I've kept the introduction scene very brief. Sorry. **

**Anyways, a nice long chapter for you! Let me know what you think. And message me if you have any questions or you just wanna talk. See you around!**

* * *

I was nervous about meeting her family. I mean, given, I was the one who volunteered to go with her to her parent's lakehouse; but the thought was still petrifying.

Absolutely petrifying.

But maybe it wouldn't be so bad. I mean, I figured I would be working all weekend anyway. I had already taken off so much time from work, so I had packed my laptop to do some catching up. The sole purpose of the trip was so that Alice didn't have to go alone. That was good enough. Right?

All I had to do was meet the Cullens. All the Cullens.

And do the usual social stuff; you know, talk to them, eat their food, sleep in their house. And get them to like me.

Oh God.

_What if they don't like me? What if they think I'm intruding?_

My phone rang, and Alice's name popped up on the screen. I answered quickly.

"Hello?"

"Bella!" Came the greeting from the other line.

"Hey Alice."

"I'm here."

"Geez, is it noon already?" I asked, jumping up from my seat at the desk.

"Yup. I'm downstairs."

I looked around my room, which was a disarray of clothes and work papers. "Okay, give me a minute. I'm halfway through packing."

"Bella!" She hissed.

Of course, I should've been done packing last night. Except I laid in bed all night, with the anxiety of a million possible scenarios running through my head. I mean, first impressions on the millionaire parents were a big deal. You gotta wonder about these things.

"Sorry," I offered. I tiptoed through the room, avoiding the piles of clothes on the ground. I felt sort of bad leaving my room so messy over the weekend, but it was the least of my concerns for now.

"It's just two nights, bring a shirt and some shorts."

"Got that," I said, scooping up a tank top off the ground and throwing it into my duffel bag.

"Flip flops?"

"Got that, too." I said.

"Tooth brush."

"Mhmm."

"Sun glasses, sun tan lotion, bathing suit?" She listed off.

"_Bathing suit_? What for?" I asked.

"Swimming, duh!"

"I said I'd go with you. I did not consent to participating in any activities!" I said, trying to save myself the future embarrassment of having to be in a bikini around her family.

"It's a lakehouse, Bella. I'm dragging you in the water with or without swimwear." Alice said, firmly.

"That's a joke." I stated.

"If you say so." Alice said, and I could almost hear the smirk in her voice. "Now hurry up; I'm not supposed to idle out here."

I walked over to my dresser, rolling my eyes as I picked up a swimsuit suit from the drawer. She'd probably talk me into swimming anyways, and I'd rather have something to wear. I set to work gathering up all my work papers, shoving them into a file before placing it in my laptop case. Good enough for a 30-second packing job.

"Okay, I'll be down in a minute." I said.

* * *

The drive down to Washington was made infinitely better by Alice's Porsche. And her company, too, if we want to get into that realm of things.

The four hour trip went by pretty fast. As usual, Alice had the attention span of a peanut while driving; I did in fact fear for my safety. But I got to plug in my iPod for the ride, and it turns out Alice loves musicals too. Well, I'm more of a Phantom of The Opera person, while she's more of a Les Miserables girl; but that was a debate for another day.

We managed to make it while the sun was still up - according the GPS, at least. It said the destination was just up the road. I looked out the window, letting the cool breeze brush past my forehead. All I saw so far were trees. Lots and lots of trees, and lots of dirt road.

"Alrighty, here we are." Alice hummed, leaning forward in her seat as if craning to see something.

I looked around. Still more forest. Alice turned the car onto a stretch of pavement that seemed to come out of no where, and the surrounding trees began to thin out. Through the trunks I could see little glimpses of the water farther down the way we were going; bits of blue peeked its way from behind branches. Alice turned the car again and - o_h._

Okay, yep.

There was definitely a lake house here. And it was definitely a glass mansion.

Alice pulled up to the luxurious wood "cabin", bringing the yellow vehicle to a halt. She gave me a sideways glance.

"Wow." I managed to get out.

"Welcome," She said, offering a smile before stepping out of the car.

I followed suit, opening my door and stepping out onto the asphalt. Alice had popped the trunk and was taking out our duffle bags.

"Here," I said, coming over to take them from her. I grabbed mine and slung it over my shoulder, reaching down to grab hers as well.

"Oh, that's fine." She said, trying to take it back.

"Nope," I said, walking ahead of her. "I've got it."

She shook her head, but smiled. "Thanks."

"This is a really nice place." I said, as we made our way to the front doors.

"They've done a lot with it. It used to just be an empty clearing." Alice said. She nodded at the door. "You can just walk in."

I looked at the heavy oak with a hesitant expression. "Uhh. Why not ring the doorbell?"

The last thing I wanted to do was walk into the house unannounced.

Alice smirked as she brushed past me, opening the door herself. She looked over her shoulder at my immobile form. "What, are you nervous?" She asked with a laugh, pausing in the door frame.

"No." I shuffled my feet. "Maybe a little."

Alice smiled reassuringly, walking back over to me. She came up so close I took a step back, the heel of my foot brushing against the wooden arch. "There's nothing to be nervous about." She said, reaching her hand towards mine. "They're gonna love you." She said, flashing a smile before taking her duffle bag from my grasp and turning on her heel.

I shook my head, letting out a short laugh as I watched her go. "Easy for you to say." I murmured, moving to follow her through the house.

She walked through the foyer and kitchen, setting her bag down on one of the seats before sliding open the back door. I swallowed hard. I could see and hear people outside, and my eyes swept over the picturesque family. I thought back to our drive over where Alice had given me a short briefing on her family members. The big one with the curly hair must be Emmett, Alice's cousin - apparently he was over-friendly and very excitable; the blonde sitting beside him must be his wife, Rosalie - a bit cold, a bit standoffish (Alice said not to take it personally). Edward was there, sitting at the table with his cousins, his foot propped up on the opposite knee. Who I assumed was Alice's mother, Esme, was sitting on a muskoka chair, petting a rather large golden retriever. The dog sat happily by her side. And finally, the man standing by the barbecue must be Carlisle, Alice's father.

I finished my quick analysis and took a quick breath as Alice tilted her head towards the door.

"Ready?" Alice asked, as I walked up to stand beside her.

Aside from the indigestion churning my stomach, and my social awkwardness turning my face tomato red? Ready.

I swallowed the rock in my throat and nodded.

"Just be yourself. It's the best." Alice said, wrapping her fingers around my wrist and tugging me outside.

Sure. No pressure.

Our entrance was received with a bout of noise as everyone seemed to pipe up at once.

Alice bounced onto the patio with me in tow. "Hey guys." She chimed, stopping us at the table.

"There she is!" Came Emmett's booming voice as he rose to greet us. He hugged Alice first before turning and gathering me up in a hug as well. "You must be Bella." He said, grinning as he released me.

"Hi." I said. Yep, he was friendly alright.

"How did you manage the drive with this one?" He asked, jabbing a finger in Alice's direction. "She's so annoying."

"I, uhh-" I stumbled.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Yeah, you're the expert on being annoying." She said, slapping a hand on his chest as she went to give Rosalie and Edward a cheerful hug. "You know Edward;" Alice said, and Edward gave me a little wave. "And this is Rose, Emmett's wife."

"Hi Rose." I said, and she gave me a tight smile.

Alice beckoned me over to the barbecue where her parents were standing.

"Mom, dad, this is Bella. Bella, this is Esme and Carlisle." Alice said with a bow.

"It's good to finally meet you." Esme said.

I stretched out my hand for a handshake. "Very nice to meet you." I said, dipping my head a bit.

Carlisle laughed, interrupting my handshake and clapping me on the shoulder. "No need to be so formal, Bella. You're family for the weekend. Deal?"

I didn't know what to do with my outstretched hand, so I awkwardly placed it on his elbow. "Uhh, deal." I said, flashing a smile.

I felt something wet dabbling at my leg, only to find the golden retriever sniffing at my feet. He looked up at me with big brown eyes.

"Hey buddy!" Alice said, bending down to pet him. He tried to parade her face with doggy kisses and Alice laughed, looking up at me. "This is Zeus. He seems to like you."

I bent down too. "Hey there little guy." I said, giving him a scratch behind the ear. He leaned into it, nearly plowing me over in the process. "I used to have a dog just like this when I was a kid."

Alice grabbed onto his sides, steadying him. "Well, you have to tell me about it some time." She said, giving me a sideways smile.

The wind scattered Alice's bangs across her forehead in an array of chaotic beauty, and I couldn't help but smile back.

And I'll be damned if we weren't having a moment.

Emmett's voice cut through the pleasantries. "Now that we're all here, can we finally eat?" He called over (followed by a mumbled comment from Rose about how food is all he ever thinks about). Carlisle opened up the barbecue cover to reveal a steaming variety of grilled vegetables in response.

Esme offered me a hand up. "Are you hungry, Bella? It's vegetarian." She said.

I nearly laughed. Of course it was vegetarian. Of course their entire family would be vegetarian.

Instead, I just nodded as I let the older woman help me to my feet. "Sounds delicious."

* * *

Well, aside from the fact that I think I've developed an allergy to vegetables due to overexposure, dinner was pretty alright. I was nervous about not knowing what to say, or maybe not gaining the approval of Alice's family members, but I was pleasantly surprised that they seemed to have accepted me as one of their own (miraculously with zero work on my part). Emmett badgered me all night about living in New York, my music preference, and much to my distaste, my relationship status - which I was forced to lie about repeatedly with Alice watching the whole thing. All the while she sported a knowing smirk on her smug little face. And shoot me if I found that kind of hot.

On the flip end, Rose didn't really talk to me; but I wouldn't know what to say to her anyways. Carlisle and Esme seemed to just enjoy having the family together again, and Edward and Alice were engaged in their usual sibling banter for the majority of dinner.

The movie night that followed wasn't too bad, either. Albeit, chick flicks are boring and predictable, but Emmett fought for the right to pick tomorrow night's movie. And call me presumptuous but he seemed to have too much testosterone to pick another lame romance film. So I think we're good on that front.

And then it was bed time.

Since we'd arrived rather late into the day, everyone was already splitting to go to sleep. Carlisle and Esme had already left a little earlier, and Emmett and Rosalie scampered away talking about "feels" from the movie. Yeah, I don't know.

Alice was currently taking a shower, which left me sitting on the couch with Edward. This was a good thing, because of all people to be left alone with, Edward was my Cullen of preference. Plus, I wanted to pick his brains about our phone call last week.

"Do you want some wine?" Edward asked, already getting up to sift through the kitchen. "We usually keep some up here. Otherwise they'd be in the cellar, in which case I retract my offer."

I nodded. A little alcohol seemed very welcoming after the long day. "Sure." I said.

Edward checked a few cupboards, bending behind the counter and out of view. He popped back up with a bottle of Grey Goose instead. "We just have vodka here. Think of it as a more efficient wine." He said, plucking a two glasses from the shelves. He fished some ice from the fridge and filled the glasses before coming back over. "On the rocks, my friend." He said with a crooked smile.

I took the glass from him. The clear liquid was almost filled to the brim. "Are you trying to get me drunk?" I asked, taking a sip and wincing.

"Sloppy drunk." Edward said with a small giggle. "Then you can tell me all your secrets and not look so constipated all the time."

I almost spit out my drink. "Wha- I don't look constipated! Do I?" I asked, my eyes widening a bit.

"When you're around Alice, yes."

I ran a hand over my face. "Oh God."

Just what I needed - my emotional dysfunctions to express themselves as bowel dysfunctions. If Edward could see them, Alice has probably been seeing them from the beginning. Might as well stamp a sign on my forehead.

Edward took a sip of his drink before sticking his hand out to speak. "It's not that bad. You just seem really stiff around her; like you're scared to step out of place. But you really like her, don't you?" He asked.

I opened my fingers, peeking through at him. Wasn't that an obvious question? "Jacob hasn't told you?"

Edward laughed. "Oh, no; Jacob tells me a lot. But I like to get my information first hand. You know, see things for myself."

"And?"

He shrugged before answering casually. "Yeah, I think you do like her."

A let out a huff through pursed lips. "Revelation." I breathed.

Edward laughed again, polishing off his drink. He bent over to fill his glass, then leaned back on the couch with a thoughtful look. He held eye contact with me for a few seconds before speaking. "Why are you so scared to be yourself around her?" He asked, his brows coming together slightly as if he was trying to figure it out for himself.

"I'm not."

"You are." He pressed.

"I spilled my guts to her last week, and she turned me down." I said, crossing my arms. Like I wanted to relive_ that_ situation.

He shrugged once more. "Did she?"

I knitted my brows. What was he getting at? I didn't want to play games. "Of course she did. She made it very clear that she didn't feel the same way about me. Plus, I never stood a chance." I said, feeling a buried bitterness rise up in my chest.

"Now you're making stuff up." Edward said, propping his head up on his hand, while the other twirled his glass lazily. "You're gorgeous, talented, kind and super cute. You've got the complete package, plus some. So I'd say you definitely stand a chance." He said, his lips parting in a small smile.

I opened my mouth to say something, but ended up stumbling on the first syllable. I wasn't good at receiving compliments. Especially compliments like _that_.

Edward's smile brightened as he continued. "And you know what the best part is? Those aren't even my words." He said, continuing to lean back as he let the words sink in.

After a moment's deliberation, I began to understand what he was trying to say. "Wait, you mean -" I started, a bit unsure. "Are you telling me that Alice said those things?" I asked.

Edward gave a very slow nod.

I ran a hand through my hair, casting a thoughtful look off to the side. On one hand that was great; on the other hand that might just make Alice the biggest tease to ever walk this earth. "But why would she say that?" I demanded, trying to get my head around it. "If she doesn't like me back, why would she say those things?"

"Beats me." Edward chuckled. "But if you knew Alice, you'd know that she's complicated. You know, she's been through a lot and and tends to use her pain like armor. She protects herself from things that might hurt her."

"She thinks I'll hurt her?" I asked.

"No. But then again, how could you hurt her unless she had some feelings for you?" Edward asked.

The question lingered in the air.

I downed the rest of my drink, thinking about what he said. Could it be true? If Alice had feelings for me, she was doing a good job of hiding it. And not reciprocating in the slightest. And what was that talk about me hurting her? I would never. At this rate, I probably couldn't. I've have an aneurysm before I'd gain any leeway in that field.

Didn't Alice know how much she meant to me? Surely she should know that.

I blinked a couple times. That vodka was making my head fuzzy.

"Hey guys."

My head shot up to see Alice standing in the archway, clad in tiny little shorts and an over sized plaid button-up. My inner narrator whistled.

"Hey sis." Edward said.

"Hi." I responded, trying to get my head out of the gutter.

"Shower's free." Alice said, nodded off to the direction of the bathroom.

"And that's my cue. It was nice drinking with you, and do think about what I said." Edward said, getting up from his spot on the couch. "Good night ladies." He called. As he walked past Alice, he looked over his shoulder and gave me a wink from behind her back.

I raised an eyebrow at him.

Alice didn't seem to notice. "Sleepy?" She asked, sticking by her spot in the archway. Her hands were on her waist, and she looked absolutely adorable swallowed up in that big shirt.

"Not really." I said. Seeing her was pretty much kick starting my heart and I felt like I had all the energy in the world. "But I suppose this vodka is gonna knock me out soon."

"I would drink too, if I had to meet _my_ family for the first time." Alice said, chuckling.

I smiled. "Actually, it wasn't that bad. Your family is really nice and fun. You must be the odd one out."

"Hey!" She defended.

"Just kidding. You're fun too." I said.

She jutted her chin out. "Better." She stated.

I drummed my fingers on my knees. "So, where am I staying tonight?" I asked. I might as well get cozied up for bed.

"_Well,_ they thought Jasper was going to come up this weekend so they didn't prepare the guest room. Sorry about that." She said, looking genuinely sorry. She scrunched up her lips to one side, as if contemplating the alternatives. "So, you can sleep out here on the couch; I can bring out some blankets and make a pretty comfy nest. . . Or you can just come sleep with me." Alice said, looking down at her hands as she said it.

I swallowed.

"I - uhh, which one do you want?" I asked. My throat suddenly felt very dry; the thought of sleeping beside Alice again was sending my mind in corkscrews.

She gave a measured shrug. "Well, my family is full of morning people. I don't think you'd want to be caught in the crossfire. That's if . . . You don't mind sleeping with me." She said.

"I don't." I answered. Too fast. It sounded weird.

Alice laughed, beckoning me with two fingers. "Well, come on then." She said.

"Ok." I managed to croak out as I dumbly got up from the couch and followed her up the stairs.

Was this normal? Sleeping in the same bed as your friend? Did other people do this kind of thing? Surely Alice knew that asking me to sleep with her was a lot different than asking someone else to. I mean, she wasn't stupid. She knows I like her, and she probably knows what she's doing to me.

What a damn tease.

We got to her room and I closed the door behind me. It was a simple room with wooden furniture and red accents. My bag was already here by the foot of the bed. - as if she knew I'd accept her offer.

Alice hopped onto the bed, laying there with her hands behind her head.

"Window side, or door side?" She asked.

I looked her up and down and maybe forgot to breathe a bit. I mean, was it legal to be that hot? And then it registered that she was asking me what side of the bed I wanted to sleep on.

"Door side." I said, and Alice rolled over to the other side, landing in the same hands-behind-head position. I couldn't help but smile at the cuteness.

I fished out my toothbrush from my bag and went to the washroom to get ready for bed. It was a small washroom with only a sink and a toilet, but it would do. I took the liberty of using the toothpaste that was already on the basin and brushed my teeth. Through the mirror I could see Alice between the crack in the door; she was pulling out a book and settling herself in.

I watched her silently, wondering to myself.

It was strange how far we've come. It went from a chance meeting to another chance meeting, to us actually becoming good friends. And that was special. I wasn't good at making friends, let alone feeling comfortable talking to people that I hadn't already known for ever. So this was nice.

That was the friendship part. The feelings part was a whole different story.

I'd never met someone who could make my heart flutter the way she did. I've never felt that way about anyone. No one's been able to move me like that. Then she comes along and makes it seem easy. And the more I learned about her, the more complex she became. I might have started out thinking she was perfect, but then as I began to understand her flaws she became more than that - she became real. And here I was thinking that those types of people, and these types of feelings only exist in story books. But there she was, laying in a bed that I'd soon sleep in as well. This wasn't me standing in New York, liking some girl I've never met. I met her, got to know her, and those feelings _stayed_. And that too, was special. I felt something warm stir inside my chest, and it wasn't just the vodka from earlier.

I changed into a tank top and shorts, then quickly washed my face. Drying my face on my own shirt, I walked out into the room.

Alice looked up at me. She was already under the covers, her book resting on her lap. She patted the bed on my side, and I took the invitation to come sit beside her.

"Are you gonna keep reading?" I asked, as I slipped my feet under the covers.

She put the book on the bedside table. "Nope, we can just sleep now." She said, making a point to pull the covers up to her neck. In half a second she had created a mountain of blankets around her. I almost mentioned that the last time we slept together, she was a total blanket hog; but I decided against it.

"Okay." I said. I wasn't really sleepy, but I figured I could use the rest.

Alice turned off the lights, and I turned on my side, facing away from her.

My eyes were adjusting to the darkness when her voice filled the room again. "Hey, Bella;"

"Yeah?" I answered.

She shifted a bit closer, and suddenly I could feel her breath tickling my shoulder blades. "Wanna wake up early tomorrow? I'll show you something neat." She said.

I kept my eyes shut, trying to distract myself from the warmth of her breath on my skin. It felt unreasonably nice. "Sure." I said.

"Great. Good night, then." She said.

More destructive air spewing onto my back. My eyes squeezed tighter.

"Good night, Alice." I said.

And then I felt her hand snake around my torso, gently but firmly; followed by the rest of her body pressed against my back.

My eyes shot open.

And so began another sleepless night.

* * *

**Well, I sort of rushed through the last bit because I wanted to post it before I went to work. But tell me how you like it . . . **

**A handful of chapters left, my friends!**


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